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Is marrying certain groups frowned upon in your family?

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How does your family view marrying/dating certain groups?
Allowed without any restrictions 37%  37%  [ 10 ]
Allowed but certain groups preferable over others 19%  19%  [ 5 ]
Allowed but certain groups frowned upon 7%  7%  [ 2 ]
Greatly discouraged for certain groups 30%  30%  [ 8 ]
Forbidden 7%  7%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 27

salad
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23 May 2021, 1:35 am

I wanted to do a survey on WP and document the prevalence of how families are ok with/condemn the marrying/falling in love with those from certain groups or cultures.

In my family's culture marrying outside is very frowned upon, and ESPECIALLY if the person is darker skinned its a major stigma. The whiter skin and lighter features, the better, but god forbid if someone from my community married a darker skinned person, or even worse, an African American, there would be some hell raised....

Mind you I dont support it obviously, but this is how our culture is. Its backwards and racist and needs reform. Family is Palestinian btw.

What about in your family. Is there any opposition, stigma, barriers or any considerations made when marrying someone from another group, or is your family completely open minded and won't bat an eye no matter who you marry/date?


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funeralxempire
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23 May 2021, 1:55 am

Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


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cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 1:58 am

nope



salad
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23 May 2021, 1:58 am

funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


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cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 1:59 am

salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?



Gentleman Argentum
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23 May 2021, 1:59 am

salad wrote:
I wanted to do a survey on WP and document the prevalence of how families are ok with/condemn the marrying/falling in love with those from certain groups or cultures.

In my family's culture marrying outside is very frowned upon, and ESPECIALLY if the person is darker skinned its a major stigma. The whiter skin and lighter features, the better, but god forbid if someone from my community married a darker skinned person, or even worse, an African American, there would be some hell raised....

Mind you I dont support it obviously, but this is how our culture is. Its backwards and racist and needs reform. Family is Palestinian btw.

What about in your family. Is there any opposition, stigma, barriers or any considerations made when marrying someone from another group, or is your family completely open minded and won't bat an eye no matter who you marry/date?


This just never came up in my family, because both my brother and I prefer our own race, Caucasian. There is little to no sexual attraction for the darker skinned, or as my brother put it, a black woman would have to be really exceptional to get him interested. In my case, I once had sex offered to me by a young and fit black woman and turned her down, just was not interested at all.

I don't think there would have been any major difficulty if one of us brought a black person home. My parents were both pretty liberal on racial matters. It just never happened.


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salad
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23 May 2021, 2:07 am

cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


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funeralxempire
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23 May 2021, 2:11 am

salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


Yeah, I've dated people from a few different backgrounds. My ex was Ethiopian/Tigray and my folks adored her like a daughter. The women before that they didn't trust so much because I had mentioned that she camwhored and she got really, really baked before meeting them because of how anxious she was.


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cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 2:23 am

salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


Ok this is probably quite common. If its any consolation the people in the dishonourable list (Asians, Indians) think exactly the same way. Don't bring home an African.



cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 2:24 am

funeralxempire wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


Yeah, I've dated people from a few different backgrounds. My ex was Ethiopian/Tigray and my folks adored her like a daughter. The women before that they didn't trust so much because I had mentioned that she camwhored and she got really, really baked before meeting them because of how anxious she was.


Yeah I'm the same, dated international. Weird thing is I never met a female of African background, damn shame.



salad
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23 May 2021, 2:33 am

cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


Ok this is probably quite common. If its any consolation the people in the dishonourable list (Asians, Indians) think exactly the same way. Don't bring home an African.


I never understood the hate Africans got. They are easily the nicest, most kindhearted people ive ever met. Anti-African racism is really messed up


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cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 2:43 am

salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


Ok this is probably quite common. If its any consolation the people in the dishonourable list (Asians, Indians) think exactly the same way. Don't bring home an African.


I never understood the hate Africans got. They are easily the nicest, most kindhearted people ive ever met. Anti-African racism is really messed up


When I lived in Malaysia my best friend was a PhD student from Uganda. He was easily one of the nicest, well-read and most pleasant person I ever met. As with Funeral-empire he raved about girls from the horn of Africa (Ethiopia and Somali)



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23 May 2021, 2:51 am

It's the question of the past now ;) but my family would discourage contact based on one's religious and political views.


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Sweetleaf
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23 May 2021, 3:03 am

Uhh well I just don't care...I got with my boyfriend and my family likes him ok. but at the end of the day I would not ever break up with him even if my family thought I should, that is not the case which is nice but if it was i'd certainly put me and my boyfriends happiness ahead of that in importance...Like if my family does not want to accept the person I love they can f*ck right off...it is my life now. But that is not how it is my mom likes him just fine, my dad likes him my brother though there was a bit of a rough patch likes him to.

I mean both my grandparents on my dads side died recently, and to tell you a secret I don't care....I was never close to them so it was nothing to me that the died. I mean I was a little sad because sounds like my grandpa died and my grandma just kinda followed like she stopped eating and crap and just waited till she died to so that is sad but as far down as I dig I still don't care. I am more sad about a friend I had for a while who died train hopping, I still think about that but I still don't care that my grandparents died. I mean even I was kind of surprised at how much I did not care that they died like even now I have no real emotion about it.

So idk I figure if my family would try and ruin my relationship I would cut them off of contact from me, but luckily they seem to respect I've grown into an adult and can make my own decision, so I don't think they'd try and interfere in our relationship. .


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Sweetleaf
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23 May 2021, 3:22 am

cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


Ok this is probably quite common. If its any consolation the people in the dishonourable list (Asians, Indians) think exactly the same way. Don't bring home an African.


I never understood the hate Africans got. They are easily the nicest, most kindhearted people ive ever met. Anti-African racism is really messed up


When I lived in Malaysia my best friend was a PhD student from Uganda. He was easily one of the nicest, well-read and most pleasant person I ever met. As with Funeral-empire he raved about girls from the horn of Africa (Ethiopia and Somali)


I recall a foriegn exchange student from my college that was from africa showing us like a slide show of like where he lived. It was kinda cool to see but yeah for sure he was used to the warmer climate, so like he even had a winter jacket on to go outside in the spring which seemed insane to me cause by then I thought we were getting some rather hot weather but he insisted it was chilly enough in the mornings to need the jacket. Cool guy for sure but yeah he was not used to the climate and altitude here in colorado and even complained about it a bit. I think he just ended up thinking we were all insane for living in the mountains and not hating it.


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cyberdad
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23 May 2021, 4:23 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
salad wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Nope, my parents wouldn't complain no matter what.


lucky you :( :(

I wish my family was open minded like that.


What options do you have?


My family is ok with other Palestinians, white European converts to Islam, Lebanese, Jordanians and maybe Syrians. Anything outside of that has varying levels of no. Marrying Middle Easterners outside of the countries I already mentioned is acceptable but criticized. The darker skinned Arabs though are less favorable. Indians and other South East Asians is really dishonorable. Africans is a huge scandal and looked at as wild. African Americans aren't even considered.

Jews? Literal treason whose penalty is expulsion from the family.

It sucks when your family is so backwards on this stuff. I wish they evolved and modernized like the rest of the world did.


Ok this is probably quite common. If its any consolation the people in the dishonourable list (Asians, Indians) think exactly the same way. Don't bring home an African.


I never understood the hate Africans got. They are easily the nicest, most kindhearted people ive ever met. Anti-African racism is really messed up


When I lived in Malaysia my best friend was a PhD student from Uganda. He was easily one of the nicest, well-read and most pleasant person I ever met. As with Funeral-empire he raved about girls from the horn of Africa (Ethiopia and Somali)


I recall a foriegn exchange student from my college that was from africa showing us like a slide show of like where he lived. It was kinda cool to see but yeah for sure he was used to the warmer climate, so like he even had a winter jacket on to go outside in the spring which seemed insane to me cause by then I thought we were getting some rather hot weather but he insisted it was chilly enough in the mornings to need the jacket. Cool guy for sure but yeah he was not used to the climate and altitude here in colorado and even complained about it a bit. I think he just ended up thinking we were all insane for living in the mountains and not hating it.


Yeah I've heard of culture shock but moving from the tropics to snow is a form of climate shock :lol: