Joined: 8 Apr 2020 Age: 38 Gender: Male Posts: 113
25 May 2021, 6:22 pm
I was wondering why are Aspies not good at stress being pushed or constant yelling? I ask because my father get's in these moods and he just can't get it through his head that the more stressed out he gets with yelling the more I will keep it up as well, I try to tell him I want a ''peaceful'' ''puttering around'' life but why don't many NT's understand this? they just keep it up
I am really starting to wonder if there is more to being a Aspie if it's neurological as well as internal? because if I push myself for days like I have been doing I get acid reflux, IBS, and Panic Attacks or don't ''function'' right, he doesn't understand that he ''pumps'' me up and I am all stressed that is the reason why I yell and almost got into arguments with people in public
Joined: 6 May 2016 Age: 60 Gender: Male Posts: 3,965 Location: Missouri
25 May 2021, 6:32 pm
Good question, point. Have seen a number of autistic people write that with being on sensory overload all the time their baseline stress level is already high all the time & it only takes a small additional stress to push the stress level too far.
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Joined: 15 Apr 2021 Age: 50 Gender: Male Posts: 324 Location: South Africa
27 May 2021, 1:48 am
I completely get where you're coming from. Perhaps you can find some written material about autistic burnout and the importance of managing stress levels that is written by some source he would respect to give to him. He may be behaving like that because he feels overwhelmed by the fear you are "Not going to make it in life" if you don't push yourself. If you can somehow reassure him you are doing ok perhaps he will see that backing off is really the best thing. I think if you try to understand his perspective (yeah, difficult, I know!), you might be able to see how to communicate with him so he realises what he has been doing is counterproductive. Of course you have to be able to have a calm rational conversation for that to work. Good luck!
Joined: 7 Mar 2017 Age: 60 Gender: Male Posts: 1,311
27 May 2021, 2:09 am
kitesandtrainsandcats wrote:
Good question, point. Have seen a number of autistic people write that with being on sensory overload all the time their baseline stress level is already high all the time & it only takes a small additional stress to push the stress level too far.
Very true.
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Joined: 9 Feb 2012 Gender: Female Posts: 5,812 Location: California Bay Area
28 May 2021, 3:14 am
Non-autistic people tend to be better at calming themselves down; it is a basic thing for them to do so they take it for granted and don't really think about or understand the way stress can affect someone with worse self-soothing capabilities. Also they usually don't have the sensory sensitivities to be seriously bothered by the sound of yelling and stuff.