Page 3 of 3 [ 37 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3

DW_a_mom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,755
Location: Northern California

10 Jun 2021, 5:29 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
DW_a_mom wrote:
True.

And I’m glad for that.


There's probably pros and cons, fewer kids end up parents these days.


Interesting hypothesis. I never thought to connect the two. I wonder if there is any data. Correlation isn’t causation, and kids today also have increased access to good information (and bad information) on sex, pregnancy and birth control.


_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).


Brainiac42
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

Joined: 3 Jun 2021
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Posts: 381

10 Jun 2021, 5:32 pm

Update: I told her I wasn’t comfortable and she said “Okay, thank you for being up front and honest.” So it went really well.



funeralxempire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 36
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 13,465
Location: I'm right here

10 Jun 2021, 5:36 pm

DW_a_mom wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
DW_a_mom wrote:
True.

And I’m glad for that.


There's probably pros and cons, fewer kids end up parents these days.


Interesting hypothesis. I never thought to connect the two. I wonder if there is any data. Correlation isn’t causation, and kids today also have increased access to good information (and bad information) on sex, pregnancy and birth control.


Definitely it would require more number crunching to make it even a hypothesis but statistics show kids are starting that activity later and it's unlikely that teenage sex drives have changed, so the best explanation is a change in habits for expressing those drives. Whether it's porn, sexting, some other not-in-person method (or some combination), they're probably still getting off somehow.

At least it's a more reasonable premise that they are than that they're not getting off. If one wants to make that case they'll need something to support it. :nerdy:


_________________
the problem with capitalism is that eventually you run out of other people's resources and cheap labour to exploit
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


DW_a_mom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,755
Location: Northern California

10 Jun 2021, 5:53 pm

Quote:

I texted her while she is at work because I was obsessively thinking about it and I told her that it was a dealbreaker. I just can’t handle that I don’t think. Maybe that makes me insecure idk.


Whatever answer you get I suspect this is going to be a really emotional and trying time for you and want to express my empathy and support.

Shared values and shared vision are such a huge part of making relationships work, yet also difficult to find. People can love each other and not be meant to be together; when that happens it can a difficult reality to face.

I’m like you in that what I accept and respect in the broader world are not necessarily things I can handle inside my own relationship. Our relationships need to be safe places despite the inevitable fights and disagreements. It’s how we get through them that often is the biggest tell on if a relationship is meant to be.

But I confess I am nervous for you and hope I didn’t steer you wrong, and only helped you find what was already inside you. I do wish you the best.


_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).


Last edited by DW_a_mom on 10 Jun 2021, 5:56 pm, edited 2 times in total.

DW_a_mom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,755
Location: Northern California

10 Jun 2021, 5:55 pm

Brainiac42 wrote:
Update: I told her I wasn’t comfortable and she said “Okay, thank you for being up front and honest.” So it went really well.


Phew!

It is SO important to be able to be honest with our partners. Tactfully, of course.

Be aware the conversation may have more legs to it. Understanding how you feel will also generate a longer thought process on her part. Be prepared.


_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).