Should autists get married through 'trickery'?

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I would get my family bishop and preacher at the church involved to try to help us with a Bible study and shepherding help to know what to do.I think my kids will be less likely to become atheist in the futute while they are with me because I plan on homeschooling all of them using evangelical fundamentalist and/or church of Christ material.

Trying to brainwash kids won't keep rebellious freethinkers from deprogramming themselves. Many atheists come from exactly the background you describe. Once people go 'no, that actually sounds silly' it's unlikely they'll reconsider.

^ Thanks for explaining it in calm words - the topic is a bit too personal for me to speak calmly.
I kind of reconciled with my parents using a lot of healthy distance - but it took over a decade.

Depends on how badly ASD effects someone. If someone with ASD suffers terrible anxiety, ADHD and is unable to cope without constant support from others for example then telling a potential partner is a no brainer and correct choice.

If someone with ASD can cope perfectly fine without any external help and is a hot shot doctor or something then I don't really see the point in telling a partner as their ASD is having no effect on their overall life. Any partner worth their salt should consider ASD as irrelevant in such a case and probably shouldn't even dwell on it in the slightest.

That's not a good enough reason to have kids.

On the subject of trickery, there should be none in my eyes unless it's to avoid being discriminated against.

Yes and no.

"Subclinical" ASD - or BAP - can be thought of as a personality trait. It's fair that your partner knows your personality.
Unless the person is super-well-educated on the topic, though, using the word "autism" would probably introduce more confusion than understanding. So, it's better to just describe the relevant parts, like "I like my routines, they make me comfortable" or "I'm bothered by bright lights".

As and when issues come along that someone with ASD is prone to then yeah it'll be best to tell a partner about it but a lot of NT's have their little moments too. A very high functioning NT is better off just warning a partner if one of their weird little moments is approaching than explicitly telling him/her they have ASD.

Personally for me. I might eventually tell a potential partner I have ASD but that will be when a relationship is already very far long. I may also never tell them. My ASD is almost exclusively poor social skills and little else. Any date would be able to spot it at first glance if they pay attention and if I get to a second date then as far as I'm concerned my ASD didn't bother them.

With an ASD sufferer who needs constant care and supervision a partner is best knowing off explicitly that they have ASD. If it's anything more little moments that are blips from time to time then it's best to tell someone.

Lot of satanists also come from that kind of background though most satanists are athiests to.

Why do autists make bad partners?

Why do you think marriage involves misleading people?

Why do you think an autistic person is unfulfilling?

I'm asking sincerely. Where did you get these ideas?

Odds are really good that your children will not live by the church’s rules. Or, even if they believe, that they will have a rebellion period. Will you kick them out?

When a person becomes a parent, they have a duty, I believe, to love their kids unconditionally (you can create boundaries, but they will ultimately become their own people). What I’m seeing is a whole lot of conditionally. Even if you believe you will still love them as you kick them out, your actions will say otherwise.

I was not a “no boundaries” parent, but I learned to meet my children where they needed me to, so they could be as God actually made them, not as I believed God intended to make them.

The beautiful thing about becoming a parent, is learning who they are as individuals. They have their own minds, their own soul, and their own free will. We can guide and advise, but children aren't replacement parts for our own existence.

Your child will have their own philo-spiritual beliefs, their own identity, and their own path.

Loving parents know that by instinct.

So ... you intend to isolate your children from their peers, gang up on them with church leaders, and then indoctrinate them with religious propaganda.

What will you do when they realize that they have been brainwashed?  How will you explain to them that they have no friends or social skills because you believe that religious indoctrination is more important?  How are you going to support them when they turn 18 and cannot get into college?  How are you going to feel when the only well-paying jobs they can get involve military enlistment?

Yes, what Isabella said.

Texas, I wanted my children to have my religion, and my son does, but my daughter does not. She is spiritual, but a perfect storm of differences eventually made her realize the church was not a fit. Just like being ASD in an NT world can feel like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole, the same is true with religion. The way God made my daughter, the essence of who she is, is not a fit for my church. All the intervention in the world will never change that, and could only increase the divide.

There is no part of me that believes God will abandon her because she has abandoned a church and it’s flawed, very human, leadership. She isn’t a fit for the human world attempt to understand God and His will. That is, in the end, what all religion is: human’s attempt to understand God and His will. But because I’ve been able to meet her where she is, instead of where I wanted her to be, she isn’t abandoning the ideals of how God wants us to live and treat others. She hasn’t lost a sense of His presence. She’s kept the most important parts.

You strike me as a little naive to how the real world and people work, Texas. I am sure your intentions are good, but without truly understanding all the implications, I believe these ideas of yours can do a lot of damage to your future family. Faith is strongest, I believe, when chosen with free will, and not adopted because no other path is seen.

A lot of the way the right-wing bubble works is that people who were raised like that end up getting jobs perpetuating that abuse against future generations.

He'll be qualified for Liberty College and will go on to work for literalist church or a right-wing thinktank.

I know adults who are seeking CPTSD therapy because their parents pushed religion too heavily when they were children, to the point it felt like a cult. Their own minds weren't allowed to develop normally, and they couldn't escape without the fear of burning in hell.

Then there are other people like me. My parents allowed me to study all religions and choose the one I liked. I actually ended up being more religious in a spiritual sense, than either of them. In this respect, kids can become religious even if it isn't indoctrinated by their parents.

It goes both ways.

It's important to teach values and the golden rule, which are common to all belief systems. It might be important to teach and share family traditions pertaining to religious holidays (Hanukkah, for example). But, telling a child what they have to think, believe, or feel about spiritual matters? That's something else all together, and it's not healthy for children.

Should we marry through trickery? Why would anyone think for one moment that this would lead to happiness?

If you’re kind in nature, someone who can compromise on ALL things, and respect your partner and understand that your children are yours temporarily to raise with love, being firm but kind, but above all else, allowing them to be “individuals” with their own hearts and minds, then maybe then, you are someone worthy of attempting to share your life with someone else.

The person you marry deserves your utmost love and respect and please allow no trickery to be involved.