Missed a chance to have sex?

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Earlier tonight I walked home this drunk woman. When I got back to her apartment she asked me if i wanted to sleep with her. she started kissing me to.

I declined and said I needed to back to the pub and see friends.

Do you think I blew my only chance to ever have sex?


she is 67 and I am 31

Sleeping with a drunk person doesn't count as "sex".

It counts as rape.

It's good that you walked away.

You did the right thing by not having sex with an intoxicated person. Being intoxicated is called being "impaired" for a reason and you would have taken advantage of her impaired state by doing so.

You dodged a bullet. Being drunk, she did not have the ability to make a clear choice to have sex. Alcohol consumption reduces inhibitions and can cause people things that they often regret later on. IsabellaLinton is right, it would be considered rape in the eyes of the law.

I have had offers like that before from drunk ladies at a local pub that I would eat at. It did not matter if they were pretty or not, I would politely turn them down. (One was there at a bachelorette party even.). Some took it well, but some got very huffy that I refused them. It is not right to take advantage of someone in that manner. Remember the Golden Rule to life if you want to live well.

Same happened to me yesterday. A woman I partially know started sending me messages asking for me to meet her a few miles away for the "real thing". Some people just get crazy horny along with lowered inhibitions if they drink

It's best to turn down their offers unless they behave exactly the same sober too in which case it's more personality than alcohol. Only then might it be OK but those people are very rare and you need to know them well first. Can't touch someone drunk with a barge pole if you even have the tiniest slither of suspicion they might wake up in the morning regretting it.

Being a virgin at 31 is a rough situation to be in too. You have my sympathy, but you did the right thing.

Nobody is entitled to sex though

Yeah. People need to ensure others are genuinely up for it without alcohol playing a huge factor.

It sounds to me like James walked her home from the pub
& based on various posts I've read by James about being at pubs, I would guess that he himself had also been drinking. When all parties having that sex were impaired due to being under the influence of alcohol &/or drugs at the times, it can be extremely difficult to prove who is the real victim & who is the real rapist. It becomes a giant confusing mess & both would likely drop the charges against each other so they themselves would not risk being held accountable for rape or sexual assault.

No I was actually completely sober when I walked her home

I don't want to play devils advocate but being under the influence of alcohol or drugs doesn't automatically make someone unable to consent. I've found myself in a situation a few years ago where a old school friend who always suffered from anxiety decided to ask me over to her house for the first sexual encounter she had in many years as I was the only one she trusted at the time. She said she needed a few drinks to calm her nerves before I popped over and she was a little tipsy at the time and I was sober but as far as I was concerned it was all above board. Her having a couple of glasses of wine to deal with her anxiety was part of the process of giving consent.

We need to remember we are apsies. We are not likely to be dating and having sex with sexually experienced social butterflies.

We're going to be dating long distance partners who might not have been able to enjoy the slow progression in a relationship others have had.

We might be dating recently divorced people who have only ever had one sexual partner in their entire lives and are nervous of meeting their second sexual partner at the ripe age of 35.

We might be dating people who are just naturally very anxious people who have pent up desires but have been to afraid to act on them for many, many years.

Regardless of the reasons, "liquid courage" might be needed in certain circumstances and there is nothing nefarious about someone saying "Sorry, It's been a while, I might need a drink first to calm down"

If you just happen upon a drunk woman you never met before in your life in the street however who is clearly drunk...........keep well away unless it's to help her home only.

i regret something very badly from 2008, it makes me think, if it had gone differently, i probably would never have joined this forum, and i probably never would have attempted to seek help from the dating coach industry, or might have completed community college over a decade ago, and maybe not living with my parents anymore either.

You've broken no rules whatsoever by being on this forum in the last few hours, but is there is a reason why you've made so many posts in the last few hours? I sense something has rattled you recently?

You could ask her number and call her back the next day to check on her when she’s sober.

Defiantly a possibility but the age gap is a but much.

I wonder who would regret it more, the woman or James.

To be fair I probably would have just ended up sleeping with The woman in her bed.

I doubt it would have led to sexual intercourse looking back on it.