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Technic1
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03 Aug 2021, 9:39 pm

As in all or nothing black and white thinking?



hurtloam
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04 Aug 2021, 12:13 am

No. Being too black and white about things can hurt other people when you don't take nuances and circumstances into account when making a decision or interacting with someone.



Technic1
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04 Aug 2021, 12:22 am

Then what is white thinking?



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04 Aug 2021, 12:34 am

"Black and White" thinking isn't about "black" being "bad" or "White" being "Good." It is "This or That" One way or another way, no other option in between.

It is like a light switch: Off or On. People who use Black and White thinking only see things as binary options: Off or On, never anywhere in between. Granted, there is not real in between of off and on.

But in "Black and White" there are shades of gray. And between one person's perspective and another's their are zillions of different ideas and beliefs that could be different and make a difference on opinion.

Aspies, or people with ASD in general, are not better at being "Good" people or "Bad" people as anyone else. We just tend to see things in a binary or often literalistic way more frequently.



Technic1
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04 Aug 2021, 12:42 am

I am using white thinking as a way of saying all or nothing good thinking.

Double use of the word ‘white’.

On or off being very good, or on or off being very bad.



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04 Aug 2021, 1:19 am

No person, be they NT, Aspie, ASD, or otherwise, has the ability to present purely good ideas. What is good for you may be bad for me. Or bad for the NT down the street. Or bad for an entire country.

Since good and bad are pretty subjective, no one of us can ever be "really good," even if we try. And many do try. But somebody will always be offended or hurt by your actions, even if done innocently. So you can't generalize on whether Aspies are good or bad people. People with ASD are just people.

Some are good. Some are bad. Both of them are sometimes a little good or a little bad. And most of us are something in between.



funeralxempire
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04 Aug 2021, 1:33 am

No, I'm f*****g terrible. :twisted:


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StrayCat81
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04 Aug 2021, 3:02 am

funeralxempire wrote:
No, I'm f*****g terrible. :twisted:

You sure? Maybe you are actually goody-goody? :3



hurtloam
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04 Aug 2021, 3:17 am

It means a person is quite rigid in their thinking and they are liable to only see things in terms of good and bad.

Here's an example. A teacher requires students to work hard in class and to arrive on time. These are what he calls the good students. One girl has good grades and always arrives on time. But her grades start slipping and she starts turning up late.

What do you think of her now? Has she become a bad student?

A black and white thinker would say yes. They would tell her to sort herself out and work harder and get in on time!

However, a reasonable teacher would talk to her and find out if she needs any help.

Turns out her Dad died and she's having issues concentrating. He used to being her to school in the car and how she has to navigate public transport and get 2 buses to school and one of them in inconsistent and she keeps missing the connection.

Who is the better teacher? The black and white thinker or the one who understands nuance?



kraftiekortie
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04 Aug 2021, 6:42 am

Nuance!

Some Aspies suck; some aspies are great people.

Black and white thinking keeps you away from the Truth.



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04 Aug 2021, 10:06 am

Yes because we have to be. NTs are allowed to judge, manipulate, lie, cheat, break rules, whatever, because they're NTs. Aspies have the pressure and the obligation to "live and let live" and follow all the rules by the book and be extremely good people and please everyone because it would be hypocritical if we didn't.

That's the message I pick up on WP anyway.
Just stop trying to be like Jesus and just be humans! Think of yourself sometimes! Nobody's perfect, you aren't obliged to please everyone, and break a few rules sometimes! Otherwise people will just take advantage of you and you end up bending over backwards to please everyone.


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AnomalousAspergian
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18 Sep 2021, 4:03 pm

They are not nicer or more selfish than neurotypicals. Although if they lack interpersonal empathy their behaviour can manifest as selfishness. However, some on the spectrum may not even be aware that they lack empathy. It is a blind spot that they can fall into and become unfairly scapegoated by peers. They may well develop a misanthropic attitude because they don't realise why they are being scapegoated. But I think it is frustrating to be autistic because we get easily frustrated by why nonautistic behave the way they do. For example, I can understand why some people (usually neurotypicals) like banter but I still find it frustrating and generally irritating to listen to. Someone might interpret that as selfish but I can't help but feel repelled by it and annoyed at it. It's a bit like a compulsion that doesn't go away.



naturalplastic
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19 Sep 2021, 12:35 pm

Technic1 wrote:
Then what is white thinking?


Its "black and white thinking", as opposed to "shades of gray thinking".

Black and White is all or nothing -something is all good, or its all bad .

Shades of gray means to recognize nuances, in between situations, and like that.



naturalplastic
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19 Sep 2021, 5:07 pm

StrayCat81 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
No, I'm f*****g terrible. :twisted:

You sure? Maybe you are actually goody-goody? :3


I'm a goody-two-shoes! :D

Like this guy:



PhosphorusDecree
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19 Sep 2021, 5:28 pm

Joe90 wrote:
Yes because we have to be. NTs are allowed to judge, manipulate, lie, cheat, break rules, whatever, because they're NTs. Aspies have the pressure and the obligation to "live and let live" and follow all the rules by the book and be extremely good people and please everyone because it would be hypocritical if we didn't.

That's the message I pick up on WP anyway.
Just stop trying to be like Jesus and just be humans! Think of yourself sometimes! Nobody's perfect, you aren't obliged to please everyone, and break a few rules sometimes! Otherwise people will just take advantage of you and you end up bending over backwards to please everyone.


The average NT mental toolkit seems to include the ability to judge when they can and can't get away with s***. (Obviously it doesn't work all the time, or there wouldn't be prisons....) I find I have to play by the rules to a ridiculous degree, as I have no idea when I can get away with bending them. The moment I go "oh, to hell with it" is the moment I blunder into trouble. But I've grown up enough not to make this about black-and-white morality. It's just self-preservation.


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HeroOfHyrule
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19 Sep 2021, 5:41 pm

Based on experience with people in my family autistics/people with autistic traits aren't necessarily "good people". They can easily become as*holes and hurt other people just like anyone else can, though I also don't think we're more likely to become "bad people" either.