Clubbing scenes make me upset and jealous

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The scenes of people going back to the clubs and bars makes me feel like I am just wasting my life by not going out and interacting with new people like they are because they appear as though they are not anxious at all about the virus and completely oblivious to it as though its not around anymore when it is. The weird thing is it makes me jealous even though night clubs have not been my thing really anyway, they don't play the music I listen to, they get stuffy and cramped and I don't really like the flashing lights and that is not because I have photo sensitive epilepsy because I don't. I've continued to stay at home on weekends.

The clubbing scenes in TV shows & movies make me want to have a seizure or try meth. The crowds, the loud music, the people doing drugs, the flashing lights, & the montage scenes they show where things keep jumping around make me d@mn glad that I never went to a club or a bar. I think people tend to need to be drunk &/or on drugs in order to enjoy that which are both things I've never done.