Should I try to date 'bad girls' in this sense?
Oh okay thanks .
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Sweetleaf
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Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,470
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Did you tell her that you were really turned on by it though? And you'd like to incorporate more of that even when she hasn't had a bad week? Obviously not the part of her having a bad week, but just that you enjoyed the way the sex happened.
Like you have to use words to explicitly express you enjoyed that, its nearly impossible for neurotypicals to get hints from autistic people, even if you think you are giving the hint right.
_________________
We won't go back.
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
It may be a case of her moving to a new sexual level?
Breaking through boundaries?
Have you asked her if she ever was like that before?
Perhaps you are a "Virgin Whisperer".
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Did you tell her that you were really turned on by it though? And you'd like to incorporate more of that even when she hasn't had a bad week? Obviously not the part of her having a bad week, but just that you enjoyed the way the sex happened.
Like you have to use words to explicitly express you enjoyed that, its nearly impossible for neurotypicals to get hints from autistic people, even if you think you are giving the hint right.
I suspect he is doing better than both of us put together.
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Did you tell her that you were really turned on by it though? And you'd like to incorporate more of that even when she hasn't had a bad week? Obviously not the part of her having a bad week, but just that you enjoyed the way the sex happened.
Like you have to use words to explicitly express you enjoyed that, its nearly impossible for neurotypicals to get hints from autistic people, even if you think you are giving the hint right.
I did but for some reason we tried having sex two more times, and she wasn't like it as much, and I couldn't get aroused as a result.
I was told by other people that maybe I am not sexually attracted to her and we should just be friends, and I should perhaps break up with her as a result. But I feel that I am really in love with her and she makes me really happy and I never felt this way about another person before. But my friends tell me that she can still do that for me, even if we are just friends, since there doesn't seem to be sexual attraction.
However, the thought of breaking up with her would devistate me, even if we could still remain friends after. Even if we still remained friends, the thought of her having another bf later, as a result of me leaving her, would make me really jealous inside, like I threw away something great.
Is it normal to think this about someone, who I should be just friends with if the sex isn't working, according to other people?
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Did you tell her that you were really turned on by it though? And you'd like to incorporate more of that even when she hasn't had a bad week? Obviously not the part of her having a bad week, but just that you enjoyed the way the sex happened.
Like you have to use words to explicitly express you enjoyed that, its nearly impossible for neurotypicals to get hints from autistic people, even if you think you are giving the hint right.
I did but for some reason we tried having sex two more times, and she wasn't like it as much, and I couldn't get aroused as a result.
I was told by other people that maybe I am not sexually attracted to her and we should just be friends, and I should perhaps break up with her as a result. But I feel that I am really in love with her and she makes me really happy and I never felt this way about another person before. But my friends tell me that she can still do that for me, even if we are just friends, since there doesn't seem to be sexual attraction.
However, the thought of breaking up with her would devistate me, even if we could still remain friends after. Even if we still remained friends, the thought of her having another bf later, as a result of me leaving her, would make me really jealous inside, like I threw away something great.
Is it normal to think this about someone, who I should be just friends with if the sex isn't working, according to other people?
Have you considered that sex is just too much trouble and not worth the effort, especially since Mrs Palmer and her 5 daughters are always there for you?
Inexperienced women become experienced by being with men (Cpt. Obvious). If you're willing to give it time, it might get really good in the end. If your partner is on the domineering side, my experience is that it will show quite early, especially if you can get her to relax. If it does not ... maybe it's not there?
If sex isn't working I don't think I could be in a relationship with the person, even if they were a 10/10.
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,470
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
Well the problem with me is a I felt my gf is not naughty enough. However, the other day she was really naughty and wild in bed and went all out aggressive on me. I was really turned on by it, and I asked her what made her do it differently this time.
She said she was just having a really bad week, which she was. Her ex has been stalking her and she had to take legal action. I feel bad for her having a bad week, and feel bad about her ex stalking her of course... But does she have to have a bad week, and a stalking ex, in order to be passionate in bed though, or is that normal for some people, and they are not near as passionate otherwise?
Did you tell her that you were really turned on by it though? And you'd like to incorporate more of that even when she hasn't had a bad week? Obviously not the part of her having a bad week, but just that you enjoyed the way the sex happened.
Like you have to use words to explicitly express you enjoyed that, its nearly impossible for neurotypicals to get hints from autistic people, even if you think you are giving the hint right.
I did but for some reason we tried having sex two more times, and she wasn't like it as much, and I couldn't get aroused as a result.
I was told by other people that maybe I am not sexually attracted to her and we should just be friends, and I should perhaps break up with her as a result. But I feel that I am really in love with her and she makes me really happy and I never felt this way about another person before. But my friends tell me that she can still do that for me, even if we are just friends, since there doesn't seem to be sexual attraction.
However, the thought of breaking up with her would devistate me, even if we could still remain friends after. Even if we still remained friends, the thought of her having another bf later, as a result of me leaving her, would make me really jealous inside, like I threw away something great.
Is it normal to think this about someone, who I should be just friends with if the sex isn't working, according to other people?
Well, that is a start at least but you may have to specifically mention it's hard for you to get aroused without that. I just can't say how she would react. But if that is the truth then there isn't really a good way around it at least in my experience. If she feels they same way you feel about her she may be willing to work with you on the sex.
Also, seems you do see her as much more than a friend...and don't see her the way someone would see someone they'd be happier being friends with than in a relationship.
_________________
We won't go back.
It depends a lot on how relaxed you are and how attractive you find your partner, which is mostly subconscious. A woman you can logically "assess" as considered, by societal standards, "hot", might not be the same woman that gets your reptile brain going.
Maybe one way to get into the mood is to keep some dirty photos of her on your phone (in a locked away folder!). Before getting it on, e.g. after a shower or something, you can start playing out all your fantasies in your head and all the things you'd like to do. That way you'll be quite charged up already when the foreplay starts, and sex after that will be more satisfying imo.
But if you're looking for a domineering partner, consider that she too might be looking for that and in that case you have to switch roles quickly to satisfy each other. It can work, but dunno if it's for you.
ProfessorJohn
Veteran
Joined: 26 Jun 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,089
Location: The Room at the end of 2001
I am having trouble with thinking you are genuine.
Maybe one way to get into the mood is to keep some dirty photos of her on your phone (in a locked away folder!). Before getting it on, e.g. after a shower or something, you can start playing out all your fantasies in your head and all the things you'd like to do. That way you'll be quite charged up already when the foreplay starts, and sex after that will be more satisfying imo.
But if you're looking for a domineering partner, consider that she too might be looking for that and in that case you have to switch roles quickly to satisfy each other. It can work, but dunno if it's for you.
Based on what ironpony has said, she is a "good gurl".
I doubt she would allow herself to be photographed in a pornographic way.
Please correct me if I am wrong, ponyman.
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