New Aspie at 56

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Hi there. I am pursuing a diagnosis of high functioning ASD. I've done two informal tests, both indicating I'm on the spectrum. I hope to learn about myself and about you. I hope to finally feel like I fit in. I already feel like I can relate with the few online groups I've found but my anxiety is high. This is stressful. Your site is giving me hope.

Welcome to WP! No matter your diagnosis status, I hope you find WP a nice place to visit.

And that is nice. But I'm not sure what you are hoping for.

I was 56 when I retired; I was 64 when I was diagnosed. When I got my Adult Autism Assessment what I was hoping for was to finally get an explanation for what I'd been experiencing all my life. As a child I assumed I was just like everyone else and as time went on I was confused as to why I wasn't treated like everyone else (and I don't mean in a good way). By my 50s I began suspecting there might be some actual difference between me and everyone else that could explain things.

I knew virtually nothing about Autism and would not have taken it seriously as an explanation. Until "Reality" gave me a hint to read about Autism. And the more I read about Autism, and the more my bride read about it, the more we suspected I probably was a High Functioning Autistic. But even a strong suspicion is not the same as knowing so I got an Adult Autism Assessment. And I really did insist we pickup some champagne on the way home from getting the assessment which was officially: Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild).

If you are much like me, that "knowing" is about the only difference the diagnosis makes. I have yet to find any practical benefit...other than WP, of course!

There is a disadvantage for my bride, however. Now, whenever she bumps up against one of my Autie traits she gets to hear me say "I have a doctor's note for that!"

She was tired of hearing that before we left the Psychologist's office.

Given your age I hope a diagnosis works for you the way it did for me--not as a warning of problems ahead of you but rather an insight into the problems you already got past.

And, definitely welcome to WP!

Welcome to WP. I first realized I was aspie when I was almost 64 years old. I have found the forum helpful. It doesn’t come all at once. More like new insights here and there.

Welcome, there's alot of late diagnosed types here

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

This is important because many middle-aged persons and older — such as myself! — are going to be self-diagnosed.

And if you don’t mind, how hard was getting your insurance to cover the diagnosis process and/or how expensive?

This is a topic of interest to me so, sorry, what follows is a lengthy response--which I guess isn't such an odd thing from an Aspie. This response is likely only of interest to someone in the U.S. who is contemplating getting an Adult Autism Assessment.

Well...there is good news and there is bad news...

It was at the beginning of 2019 that "Reality" nudged me into learning about Autism. For a few months my bride and I did online research (and also taxes and life-in-general) we concluded I was likely a High Functioning Autistic. But, I wanted to be certain--one way or the other. By that point I knew the way to find out for certain was to get an Adult Autism Assessment.

My insurance company's website seemed to indicate that for "mental health" stuff I could just go directly to an appropriate provider without any approvals or anything. Just to be certain, though, I telephoned the insurance company and got told something different: I needed to have my Primary Care Physician request a referral. (Actually, because this was not what I got from their web page, I called the insurance company several times...sometimes I was told I could just arrange an assessment on my own, sometimes I was told I needed my PCP to submit a request.)

Note: Later I concluded that the correct story was (1) for Mental Health issues I could go directly to an appropriate in-network provider (2) they had no appropriate in-network providers anywhere near me, so (3) I would have to go off-network and that would require a request from my PCP.

To be cautious I decided to ask my PCP to submit a request for a referral. My bride had the same PCP and already had an appointment for other things so my bride relayed that I wanted an Adult Autism Assessment and we wanted her to put a request in to the insurance company. I was not there at the time but my bride says our PCP did not challenge the request, did not request additional information, and did not ask any questions. My bride says our PCP immediately requested the referral for me! (I found it somewhat interesting that the PCP was so quick to request an Autism Assessment for me.)

The insurance company did not request any additional information from me and did not ask me to do any additional paperwork. Twelve days after the PCP submitted the request I received a referral from the insurance company in the mail!

This is when things got messy. I telephoned the provider on the referral and they said they did not do Adult Autism Assessments!

I called the insurance company again and told them about this. They told me a few other names. I checked them out on the Internet and it seemed pretty obvious to me that none of them were suitable! I called the insurance company again and told them about this. They then told me I could find a provider on my own and they would issue the necessary referral. But they said the provider had to be a licensed Psychologist with ABA certifications.

I spent months trying to find that! It turns out very few psychologists have ABA certifications--and I tried to find an in-network provider like that but there were none anywhere near me! Finally I started calling off-network providers (who were not psychologists) that had ABA certification and whose web page did not explicitly limit their practice to children.

The second one I called was nice enough to explain that the ABA certification was irrelevant for performing an Adult Autism Assessment! They said all I needed to find was a licensed psychologist!

Note: My insurance company did not know what they were talking about! When I'm feeling generous I concede that Adult Autism Assessments are probably rare so they didn't have much experience with a request like mine. When I'm not feeling generous I admit their heart had been in the right place but their head had been somewhere that didn't get much sunlight.

I began a new search. I used https://www.findapsychologist.org/ to try to find a psychologist in my area whose web page said they worked with Autism and accepted patients as old as me.

Note: I think Adult Autism Assessments must be rare and that is probably why I didn't find any psychologist whose web presence said they did Adult Autism Assessments. Why advertise something that (almost) no one wants?

The first Psychologist practice I called had an Office Manager who answered the call. She did not think they did Adult Assessments but would check for me. On the callback she reported one of their psychologists would do an Adult Autism Assessment for me but it would be a few weeks before she could see me. SUCCESS!

Note: I think Adult Autism Assessments must be so rare that a psychologist willing and qualified to do one might never have done one before so their staff might not know that they would do one.

And--at the age of 64--I was officially diagnosed as Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild). Oh, by the way, I enjoyed the assessment! It was kind of fun!

Cost?

I assume the price can vary depending upon where you go. My assessment would've cost a little over $1,000--except that the Psychologist could see an IQ test wasn't needed so, without that, it cost a little under $1,000.

The Psychologist I used did not coordinate with insurance. I had to pay her directly. I was so happy with the diagnosis (it helped me understand what I'd been experiencing for more than six decades!) that the price did not bother me. Though if I had not gotten some kind of diagnosis, however, the price would've bothered me.

A few months afterwards I decided to submit the bills to my insurance providers. They reimbursed me for about half.

This could be a combo of:

1) Your primary care provider recognizing likely spectrum traits in you,

2) And/or having previously decided on time management grounds not to argue with patients too much about these types of requests, as long as the request is within reason.

Plus, your wife may have been an effective, confident, and matter-of-fact advocate on your behalf. And due to a social dynamic I only partially understand, it sometimes — certainly not always! — works better to have someone else advocating on your behalf, rather than for a person to directly advocate for themselves.

And we can also learn from this, and advocate for others with matter-of-fact confidence.

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Actually, I hope it’s not too much a time management decision on the part of the doctor, because I have high hopes for quote “regular” doctors such as internists and family practitioners as an additional choice in times of anxiety or depression. Which I’ve read 25% of people will struggle with at some point of their lives severe enough to potentially benefit from medication.

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Anyway, I liked your detailed, human response. And Congrats on maneuvering through the health care system!

Hi and welcome, sariel . Anxiety is certainly the dominant emotion for those of us on the spectrum. I wish you well in seeking a diagnosis. Good to have you with us.