Considering Alcohol for Socialising

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When I first entered the world of work I would tell people that I was allergic to alcohol so I didn't have to drink or really go out with work people. I just couldn't handle that stuff.

Then I got into whiskeys and bourbons for a while - I liked them and they were interesting to me so I drank them and it certainly did a lot for my social life at that time. Suddenly I could stand being in bars, normally the noise is unbearable, and I could even talk to people for a while. I'd usually end up disappearing without saying goodbye to anyone though when I reached my limit. These few years were pretty much the only time in my life where I've had a social life, friends and anything normal in that regard. I miss that a lot.

I don't think I was ever at risk of having a problem with alcohol, but I appreciate that for some people it's a very dangerous substance and maybe you can only really find out how you're going to react by experimenting with it.

I don't drink at all now. A few years ago I started getting a weird reaction to it, almost like asthma, where my airways start to constrict after a few sips of spirits. I don't really care enough about drinking alcohol to find out what that's all about. I just don't drink it.

I used alcohol to be in places toxic to my mental well being, I needed more and more to cope.

You seem self aware. I'd be very mindful if you do try it.

There are social gatherings that don't revolve around alcohol and you'll meet much more interesting people. Try clubs or meetings listings at your local library.

Alcohol was a disaster for me at your age.

I would highly recommend you did NOT drink to be more social or to be less anxious.

Drinking for socializing (in college) was a slippery slope for me--and landed me with a dangerous binge drinking habit. I struggled in social circles and at parties (situational mutism and sensory overload were the worst), so I thought drinking was an easy route to appearing more "normal" and becoming numbed to it all. I was able to drink a LOT of hard liquor (despite being small), and apparently I never appeared to get drunk (despite being really drunk). Drinking did take away my anxiety in the moment, but there was ALWAYS a tradeoff. Brutal hangovers with uncontrollable meltdowns and panic attacks were almost always a part of the aftermath. The only way to ease them was to drink more. Pair that with having chronic pain (and wanting relief), and that is how alcohol took over my life.

I've been sober for 6 years (last week), and I can assure you that there are good friends and moments you can make WITHOUT the use of alcohol. Perhaps the issue is the settings you are finding yourself in rather than your reaction to them? I would maybe sit down and write out a pros/cons list before making any final decisions.

I agree with both of you. I'm not religious at all either, and I've been sober 6 years (on the 15th). I don't go to AA meetings, but I'm lucky enough to have a very supportive partner (who is also my sobriety partner). We are both neurodiverse, and we both became binge drinkers.

I was an alcoholic at uni. Started drinking during my 1st year and discovered that drunk-me was a super sociable person. Alcohol helped me with socialising;I talk a lot after drinking and many of my friends appreciate drunk me. I also prefer my drunk character and alcohol helped me to relax.
I did had a bit of issues in the end. Like, i think none of my friends know what I am really like coz most of the time I was drunk. I lost myself a bit.

Though, I drink less after I graduated. It wasn't hard for me to quit alcoholism. I also understand that my friends are still my friends when I am sober. I drink once a week now when I play online games with friends. I learn to be happy when I am sober and it's ok not being able to socialise with people all the time. In fact, I now realised it was actually quite tiring at uni having to socialise all the time. I love alone time.

Would I regret using alcohol as my socialising tool tho? Probably not, coz it was just part of my uni experience and I did made a lot of great friends in the end. If I didn't start drinking at that time, I would probably ended up having 0 friends at uni. Alcohol is useful sometimes, but drink sensibly.

Wow guys, thanks for all your replies!....
Seems like approx 70% of you think it's not a good idea...

I wonder does alcohol affect autistic people differently? Like physically? I read somewhere that things like coffee and medicine affect us more strongly than others... and the dose should always be considered more carefully for us. There's also the fact that some of us are already on medication that doesn't mix well with alcohol.... and IBS and autism have also been linked.

The general thoughts is that the whole alcohol helping you socialise thing doesn't work out in the long run, because at the end of the day, you're going to be seeing people sober anyways.... maybe it's better to work on that side of things AKA not take the easy way out...

I definitely wouldn't be drinking to seem 'cool' anyways, I don't really care about that... it's really just frustrating to see other people enjoy themselves, and I feel like I'm missing out on various rites of passages, going out for drinks in college etc. It's really for myself, if that's what some of you were saying

Still though it's so frustrating feeling this way...seeing other people have a good time at parties etc. I am tempted to try a few drinks with some trusted/safe friends.....
If it's a question of self-discipline, I think I'd trust myself to experiment and not develop an addiction... but of course I appreciate that many people think this and have had their lives impacted anyways...
Thank you all so much for sharing all your thoughts and stories
they've been so interesting and insightful to read

Have you considered possibly keeping the company of some people who don't drink and party? I know that these people are probably the minority these days, but it might be an interesting path to explore?

I hope you stay safe and enjoy yourself either way <3

When I was in my late teens and early twenties I used alcohol to relieve social anxiety. At first it worked and it was really fun. But then I started increasing the frequency and quantity that I drank and I felt things getting out of hand. I did a few things I still regret, and it gradually stopped relieving my anxiety too.

But in my mid-twenties my body stopped tolerating alcohol. It is very strange but now a single beer and I start to feel bad physically. Mostly I get a headache, sometimes quite severe, but I also get sinus inflammation as well. To be honest these health problems are the reasons I quite drinking. Because it just stopped being fun due to the physical discomfort.

So I'd say if you can drink in moderation and it adds good experiences alongside already healthy and trustworthy relationships then all good, but I would not recommend using alcohol as anti-anxiety medication.

(Sometimes I wonder if my reaction to alcohol is related to my neurodiversity, or if maybe there is a third factor causing both, like maybe a certain set of genetic variations. But this is purely speculation as I am not a doctor or geneticist.)