He's not that into me

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A few years ago, I developed a crush on a former friend's roommate. That said, there have been several hints that he's not really interested though he's jerked me around a few times.

1. A few years ago, he asked me out one minute and then the next he posted on FB that he had just went on a date with another woman and dated her for 5 months.
2. After he broke up up her, he contacted me but I said no because I didn't want him to use me as a rebound. Plus, I had other things going on.
3. I had not seen him or talked to him for over a year and a half, until this weekend. I realize I still like, and I told him I would like to meet up with him sometime and he said "I'll let you know," before walking past me to his car and just ignoring me.

As hurt I was, I realize there are other nuances

A. He hasn't contacted me during the last year and a half
B. When I first saw him he said, "I didn't know you were coming."
C. He didn't really make the effort to catch up. Instead, he was more interested in playing video games.
D. If he was interested, he would have also asked if he could give me a ride home and perhaps taken me to an all night diner for coffee.
E. I am thinking if he is going to ask me out one minute and then turn around and date other women then that's a big one.

Though I put the ball in his court, I am not going to reach out and chase him. I figure if he's interested then he will call me. I also don't know him either so...

Your earlier rejection of him - because he was on the rebound and you were too busy - makes it extremely unlikely he will try again. He's probably still smarting, from being rejected before.

From this man's perspective, Bea's assessment is valid.  Also, inconsistent behavior -- showing interest, then not showing interest, and then showing interest again -- is a turn-off; thus the brush-off.

Ok, I will work on being more consistent in the future if I like someone while also being more persistent. Even if some guy wants to use me as a rebound, I will stick to my guns. In the meantime, I leave him alone by not inviting him to hang out one on one or even in a group. If he feels that way then I don't want to give him the wrong idea.


That set aide, while he was still dating the other girl, I was interested and liked him but I wanted to give him some room to be with her. Yes, I would have gone out with him but not in regards to a rebound situation like that because I think he and I would have gotten hurt.

Though it's not going to work out, I think he's a super nice guy and he certainly has some traits that I would want in a boyfriend.