Autistic teen arrested for "hate crime" for asking a trans..

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League_Girl
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28 Aug 2021, 8:11 pm

person are they a boy or a girl.

I think he was trying to ask what his pronouns were after learning he is trans. But there is so much misgendering in the comments, ugh.

https://www.womenarehuman.com/autistic- ... osecution/


Looking at the photo, I immediately thought, it's a guy. No way would I know he is trans just by looking at him. But if I had been informed they are trans, I would wonder what their pro nouns were as well. I wouldn't know if they hadn't transitioned yet, are they non binary so I think this teen attempted to ask for their pronouns but instead asked "is it a boy or a girl?" and it got misconstrued as asking about his sex. He just didn't know the appropriate question to ask.


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28 Aug 2021, 8:31 pm

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/transgender-p ... 07745.html

Quote:
Rhian Jackson, prosecuting, said PCSO Connor Freel had been in uniform on foot patrol in Mold, north Wales, in October 2019 when he passed Armstrong, who was with a friend.

She told the court that Armstrong shouted “very loudly, “is it a boy or is it a girl?” and said that when Mr Freel looked over, Armstrong made the comment loudly again.


I don't think he should be fined or anything, but I don't know where you got that this kid was explicitly told that the officer was transgender, and that he was asking what his pronouns were. Walking past someone and loudly shouting, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" at your friend about them, multiple times is odd.



HeroOfHyrule
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28 Aug 2021, 8:36 pm

The site you referenced also has a massive amount of anti-trans articles, especially targeted at trans women and how they're "destroying" feminism and "victimizing" women.

Do you have any more reliable sources that don't blatantly leave out details about what happened? I can only find 2 other sources from a year ago.



League_Girl
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28 Aug 2021, 10:28 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
The site you referenced also has a massive amount of anti-trans articles, especially targeted at trans women and how they're "destroying" feminism and "victimizing" women.

Do you have any more reliable sources that don't blatantly leave out details about what happened? I can only find 2 other sources from a year ago.



I found this on Reddit and had to look for the source and this is the only source I found and it had two other articles linked in it that covered this story.


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League_Girl
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28 Aug 2021, 10:31 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
https://uk.news.yahoo.com/transgender-pcso-wales-court-133507745.html
Quote:
Rhian Jackson, prosecuting, said PCSO Connor Freel had been in uniform on foot patrol in Mold, north Wales, in October 2019 when he passed Armstrong, who was with a friend.

She told the court that Armstrong shouted “very loudly, “is it a boy or is it a girl?” and said that when Mr Freel looked over, Armstrong made the comment loudly again.


I don't think he should be fined or anything, but I don't know where you got that this kid was explicitly told that the officer was transgender, and that he was asking what his pronouns were. Walking past someone and loudly shouting, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" at your friend about them, multiple times is odd.



It was in the article linked and it said the officer was born female. Only way the kid would know he is trans is if he was told so or otherwise there is no reason to ask is he a boy or a girl when he clearly looks male. I mean does he even look trans? What is a trans person supposed to look like? As far as I know, they look like the rest of us when they have been taking hormones.


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29 Aug 2021, 6:28 am

Wow, I think that's pretty tame compared to the abuse and insults that are hurled at cops in other situations.



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29 Aug 2021, 9:10 am

League_Girl wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
https://uk.news.yahoo.com/transgender-pcso-wales-court-133507745.html
Quote:
Rhian Jackson, prosecuting, said PCSO Connor Freel had been in uniform on foot patrol in Mold, north Wales, in October 2019 when he passed Armstrong, who was with a friend.

She told the court that Armstrong shouted “very loudly, “is it a boy or is it a girl?” and said that when Mr Freel looked over, Armstrong made the comment loudly again.


I don't think he should be fined or anything, but I don't know where you got that this kid was explicitly told that the officer was transgender, and that he was asking what his pronouns were. Walking past someone and loudly shouting, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" at your friend about them, multiple times is odd.



It was in the article linked and it said the officer was born female. Only way the kid would know he is trans is if he was told so or otherwise there is no reason to ask is he a boy or a girl when he clearly looks male. I mean does he even look trans? What is a trans person supposed to look like? As far as I know, they look like the rest of us when they have been taking hormones.

Say he was explicitly told the officer was trans (even though the source I listed said the officer was walking past them, not interacting with them at all), what's the point of shouting to your friend (not the cop), loud enough for the cop to hear you, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" and then reiterating, loudly when the cop looks at you. That doesn't seem like asking someone their pronouns to me, so I have no idea where you got that.

I don't think this kid should be fined, but I don't bite the fact that people are pushing that he wasn't being intentionally obnoxious.



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29 Aug 2021, 9:31 am

I don't think the teen should be put in prison for that matter. I also think the cop was having a bad day and was misgenderd one time too many. If I had to choose a side, I'd be on the side of the autistic teen. I also think that cops really need to ease up on people with disabilities. These aren't the 80s anymore. The days of Rainman are long past.


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League_Girl
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29 Aug 2021, 1:52 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I don't think the teen should be put in prison for that matter. I also think the cop was having a bad day and was misgenderd one time too many. If I had to choose a side, I'd be on the side of the autistic teen. I also think that cops really need to ease up on people with disabilities. These aren't the 80s anymore. The days of Rainman are long past.



Yes the cop was a victim of transphobia from when he was 15 when he came out as trans so I can understand why he reacted the way he did.


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29 Aug 2021, 2:02 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
https://uk.news.yahoo.com/transgender-pcso-wales-court-133507745.html
Quote:
Rhian Jackson, prosecuting, said PCSO Connor Freel had been in uniform on foot patrol in Mold, north Wales, in October 2019 when he passed Armstrong, who was with a friend.

She told the court that Armstrong shouted “very loudly, “is it a boy or is it a girl?” and said that when Mr Freel looked over, Armstrong made the comment loudly again.


I don't think he should be fined or anything, but I don't know where you got that this kid was explicitly told that the officer was transgender, and that he was asking what his pronouns were. Walking past someone and loudly shouting, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" at your friend about them, multiple times is odd.



It was in the article linked and it said the officer was born female. Only way the kid would know he is trans is if he was told so or otherwise there is no reason to ask is he a boy or a girl when he clearly looks male. I mean does he even look trans? What is a trans person supposed to look like? As far as I know, they look like the rest of us when they have been taking hormones.

Say he was explicitly told the officer was trans (even though the source I listed said the officer was walking past them, not interacting with them at all), what's the point of shouting to your friend (not the cop), loud enough for the cop to hear you, "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" and then reiterating, loudly when the cop looks at you. That doesn't seem like asking someone their pronouns to me, so I have no idea where you got that.

I don't think this kid should be fined, but I don't bite the fact that people are pushing that he wasn't being intentionally obnoxious.


Because as a cis person, I used to not know how to address this as well. If I saw someone that looked male but were dressed feminine, I didn't know how to address them and I would ask them if they were a man or a woman and they wanted to keep it a secret so it would put me in a awkward position because I didn't know what to refer them as. So I would say "he she" and stuff because I didn't want to use the wrong gender terms by mistake and offend them.

Don't assume that every cis person knows how to address this. I had to be told by another trans person to ask "what are your pronouns" if you don't know what to address them as. Since autistic people have no issues with using scripts, they can learn to use this script when addressing trans people.

I have also referred to babies as "it" because I didn't know if they were a boy or a girl and I didn't know about "they" pronouns then and that you can say "they" if you don't know if they are a man or a woman.

Given that this guy is 19. I was in my 30s when I learned how to approach all this. So I can understand what this autistic man may have been trying to do and I don't think it was intentional. But what I am lost at is why he would even ask this about another man if he is obviously a man? So I figured maybe someone told him he is trans. If someone told me they were trans, I would also have asked ten years ago "so are you a man or a woman" so I wouldn't misgender them. Luckily lot of them have been polite by saying (hyperbole) "I am a woman but was born male so I am a female." I would be like "okay" and use female pronouns. At least they understood what I was trying to ask.


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29 Aug 2021, 2:31 pm

Some autistic people can get caught in a loop of saying the same thing without being able to stop until they hear an answer that makes sense. I can't remember what it is called.

While I understand that the police officer would be offended, is the discrimination actually against the dissability of the one with Autism as he may not be able to prevent himself from repeating things?

It was a bit like something that happened where many of you could not see my point where a a lady reported a young man who I am convinced is on the spectrum who was staring at her and touched her as he fancied her but was unable to speak when he approached her. While they did not mention autism, when I researched what autism was and the many ways it can effect people (As before and during my time on this site I went on a deep research to try to find out what it was and one side to this describes this man perfectly, and I am surprized that no one picked up on this as this is an autism site).


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29 Aug 2021, 2:50 pm

Quote:
Some autistic people can get caught in a loop of saying the same thing without being able to stop until they hear an answer that makes sense. I can't remember what it is called.


I do the same thing too. I once saw an old lady walking around with a baby stroller and I was staring at it wondering where the baby is and she looked at me and said "This is my walker" and I was so confused. I kept asking my mom about it because I was trying to make sense of it. Then she yelled at me to "shut up." I was like 14 when this happened. I have learned to wait before asking these things because of how judgmental people are and they assume any question you ask is being judgmental.


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29 Aug 2021, 3:03 pm

Quote:
While I understand that the police officer would be offended, is the discrimination actually against the dissability of the one with Autism as he may not be able to prevent himself from repeating things?



I think he can learn how to ask the question and learn to not say anything around trans people to avoiding saying something that could come off as transphobic. Like do not ever ask about trans people "is it a boy or a girl?" and instead ask "what are their pronouns?"

It's a matter of being educated about trans people and on the issue to avoid saying something offensive. I can see an NT making this same mistake too if they were uneducated on the topic. Like they also wouldn't know how to approach them about pronouns as well so they also may ask "so are you a man or a woman?" "You mean you used to be a man and now you are a woman?"

Some trans people have more patience than others but the ones that have no patience would be the ones to stand out more. There are also lot of TERF trolls online that will make fake trans posts to make trans people look bad. So if something sounds too insane, most likely it's fake.

That is why I looked the story up online because it sounded insane and I could only find very little sources. Only three sites covered the story. But heartofhyrule found one covered by UK Yahoo news telling a different story.


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29 Aug 2021, 3:23 pm

League_Girl wrote:
Quote:
Some autistic people can get caught in a loop of saying the same thing without being able to stop until they hear an answer that makes sense. I can't remember what it is called.


I do the same thing too. I once saw an old lady walking around with a baby stroller and I was staring at it wondering where the baby is and she looked at me and said "This is my walker" and I was so confused. I kept asking my mom about it because I was trying to make sense of it. Then she yelled at me to "shut up." I was like 14 when this happened. I have learned to wait before asking these things because of how judgmental people are and they assume any question you ask is being judgmental.


Been there and done that! Haha. I remember when I was young my Mum walked me to the bus stop as when I went to secondary school there was a 2 mile walk and I had too much anxiety in the mornings before school to be able to walk it (I was fine walking back home), and at the bus stop which was not too far from the house we used to live at, there was a lady who was in her last few years before she retired also catching the same bus in the morning so my Mum would talk to her while we were waiting. Now they were talking about a manhole which is a covered drain that if the heavy metal cover is lifted, people can go down to clean the drain system, and when I heard the term "Manhole" I asked "Why don't they have womanholes?" and I was unaware of what it meant, and my Mum was trying to keep me quiet as she was embarissed, but I could not stop asking as it was sticking in my head.

Now I am ususally fine, but if something is on my mind, sometimes I will say it, and not realize that it could get me into trouble and the more I try to stop myself from saying it the more likely it will be that I accidently say it. My Dad was like that. He was hillarious!
My Dad...! During the late 1970's to the very early 1980's German people bought a house which backed onto our land, and my Mum said to him before he saw them "Whatever you do, do not mention the war". (It was only around 30 years since WW2 had ended so the German family could very well have been in the war and my Dad was born in the war years).
Now as soon as my Mum had said those words, they were on my Dads mind and the first thing he said when he saw them to greet them was "We do not hold anything against you due to the war". It was a real Bazil Fawlty moment! I can be the same! Haha! I laugh about it now but I honestly can't help it as it is how my mind works and thinks and processes information.
I was once working a train on a winters evening and at a station a really stunningly beautiful black lady got on. She was so beautiful with such deep black skin it was all I could think about. It is like seeing an unusually special train or car. She was beautiful! This got menurvous and when nurvous, to hide the nurves I tried to start up a conversation and I looked out the window and all I could see was a black sky and I said without thinking "There's a black evening out there today" and she looked at me totally offended about what I said.
Then the more I tried to correct the situation the more words came out that referred to dark or black as it was on my mind. (It was unusual to see a black person on the trains which is why my mind fixated on it). I held my hand over my mouth and kept saying sorry as I dare not say another word. I ran to the back of the train with my hand over my mouth as I was soo embarissed as I never wanted to say anything to offend her in any way!

My problem is if my mind is on something I need to talk it out. When a child I was very very quiet and would often be told off for being quiet when in school, so to talk is quite a big thing, but then I can mess up when I talk by saying the wrong thing.
This is why I am scared of these laws that limit free speech because I can so easily say the wrong thing. I never ever intend to hurt anyone, but I know how easily words come out if I am thinking about them and it scares me. But I don't want to be extremely shy and withdrawn like I used to be as it is not good for me.


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29 Aug 2021, 3:27 pm

League_Girl wrote:
Quote:
While I understand that the police officer would be offended, is the discrimination actually against the dissability of the one with Autism as he may not be able to prevent himself from repeating things?



I think he can learn how to ask the question and learn to not say anything around trans people to avoiding saying something that could come off as transphobic. Like do not ever ask about trans people "is it a boy or a girl?" and instead ask "what are their pronouns?"

It's a matter of being educated about trans people and on the issue to avoid saying something offensive. I can see an NT making this same mistake too if they were uneducated on the topic. Like they also wouldn't know how to approach them about pronouns as well so they also may ask "so are you a man or a woman?" "You mean you used to be a man and now you are a woman?"

Some trans people have more patience than others but the ones that have no patience would be the ones to stand out more. There are also lot of TERF trolls online that will make fake trans posts to make trans people look bad. So if something sounds too insane, most likely it's fake.

That is why I looked the story up online because it sounded insane and I could only find very little sources. Only three sites covered the story. But heartofhyrule found one covered by UK Yahoo news telling a different story.



I am one who could not remember what they say if they said it. I would avoid speaking to them altogether incase I said something wrong as though I would really want to be friendly, I am too scared that I would mess up.


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League_Girl
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29 Aug 2021, 3:50 pm

Mountain Goat wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
Quote:
While I understand that the police officer would be offended, is the discrimination actually against the dissability of the one with Autism as he may not be able to prevent himself from repeating things?



I think he can learn how to ask the question and learn to not say anything around trans people to avoiding saying something that could come off as transphobic. Like do not ever ask about trans people "is it a boy or a girl?" and instead ask "what are their pronouns?"

It's a matter of being educated about trans people and on the issue to avoid saying something offensive. I can see an NT making this same mistake too if they were uneducated on the topic. Like they also wouldn't know how to approach them about pronouns as well so they also may ask "so are you a man or a woman?" "You mean you used to be a man and now you are a woman?"

Some trans people have more patience than others but the ones that have no patience would be the ones to stand out more. There are also lot of TERF trolls online that will make fake trans posts to make trans people look bad. So if something sounds too insane, most likely it's fake.

That is why I looked the story up online because it sounded insane and I could only find very little sources. Only three sites covered the story. But heartofhyrule found one covered by UK Yahoo news telling a different story.



I am one who could not remember what they say if they said it. I would avoid speaking to them altogether incase I said something wrong as though I would really want to be friendly, I am too scared that I would mess up.


I'm someone that can't remember pronouns if they don't pass as their pronouns they identify as. It's the same with names too. It takes a while for me to remember. So the fact trans people say they can tell when they are being misgendered on purpose is sus. That is why I stick with gender neutral terms like "they" "person." Cis people can be referred to as "they" also if you are not sure if they are a man or a woman. Cis people can also get offended if they are misgendered by mistake. But I think it's more due to if a woman is mistaken as a man at first, it's implying she is ugly so she takes offense. If a man is mistaken as a lady, he is offended because it means he isn't masculine enough. For trans people, it's due to gender dysphoria. Online, I don't get why cis people get offended if they are misgendered by mistake. it happens to me all the time. Probably because most posters online are male. People can't see what I look like so I don't take offense.


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