Ever get in trouble for a facial expression?
100 percent agreed .
More often than not, getting in trouble for a "facial expression" is nothing more than a power trip for the authority figure punishing you. He/she knows you can't control your face. But he/she also knows it's an "easy" thing to abuse a victim for. That's why it's so common for parents and teachers to say "stop smirking at me", even when smirking was the last thing on the child's/victim's mind.
Yes.
Not merely because of mismatching or lacking any.
But merely because I cannot "stop" and it was inappropriate.
I didn't mind -- because to me, it's just facial expression.
It's better than me exploding into something more unwillfully violent or in more drastic reaction.
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I have something called a "Neutral Affect"; more commonly called a "Poker Face". While others around me are grinning like Cheshire Cats, looking like mourners at a funeral, or displaying some sort of feral rage, I am usually showing no emotion on my face unless I consciously put some effort into it.
This leads to false accusations of being aggressive, bored, or judgmental, or of simply being a snob.
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Unfortunately, there seem to be a lot of men out there who feel entitled to command women (including total strangers) to "smile!" I used to run into such men fairly often. (It has happened less often as I've gotten older and this neighborhood has become more multi-cultural.)
The last time I ran into a man who told me to "smile!", I think I said something like something like, "If you want me to smile, tell me a good joke. I don't like being commanded how to feel."
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FleaOfTheChill
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I do that as well. I often have my scrunch/I'm thinking face on. From what I hear, it's an amusing thing to behold.
I tend to be either overly animated with my face or have a dead pan expression. It seems to be all or nothing with me. I get laughs when I do weird crap with my face. When I do nothing with my face I get asked what's wrong, or if I'm bored or mad or something.
I don't get in trouble for it (though I might have as a kid, I'm old, so a bit removed from that now), but I can make people worry that I don't like them or care what they're talking about or whatever. It can also be off putting to people who don't know me if my expressions aren't situationally appropriate. Which is most of the time in my case. *shrugs*
I don't recall people making negative comments about my facial expression until I hit perimenopause -- which seemed to trigger an ASD burnout and my ability to mask seemed to slip away. I even had a co-worker outright tell me I needed to fix my face!
So for the past couple of years I have been told that I make it obvious by my facial expression when I disagree with people. I have been told that this can be intimidating. Just now realizing....my fix for that has been to actively stop caring about other people's decisions and being honest with myself about what is my business or not. If their stupid decisions don't affect me, I need not care...and so my facial expression will not contort. And if their decision does affect me, I now try to speak up and honestly disclose my thoughts on the matter (which I had been super reluctant to do.) Thus, the words and actions match the expression.
I will also smile when nervous or when someone is mad at me...that really pisses them off more! Of course, my thinking is...see I am smiling, everything is OK, right? We can all calm down now. Smiling helps, right?!?
Clearly the answer is no, smiling does not always help. It can makes things worse. Unfortunately.
So I am still trying to learn not to smile when others are upset and mad.
Plenty of lil dipshits have had the nerve to tell me off or laugh at me for making the wrong facial expressions
Precious lil "parents" had the nerve to tell me that I looked like I wanted to kill someone.
Schoolteachers
Coworkers
Strangers
Some precious lil "people" truly believe that they have a right to be happy at all times and when they are not happy, someone must've violated their stupidass "rights"
They talk too much and too loud and there are too many of them
(Verbal fluency) is just like (smooth talking)
While I am like "pick your battles" and "actions speak louder than words" . Tongue tied.
Manipulative lil ass holes
Precious lil "parents" had the nerve to tell me that I looked like I wanted to kill someone.
Schoolteachers
Coworkers
Strangers
Some precious lil "people" truly believe that they have a right to be happy at all times and when they are not happy, someone must've violated their stupidass "rights"
They talk too much and too loud and there are too many of them
(Verbal fluency) is just like (smooth talking)
While I am like "pick your battles" and "actions speak louder than words" . Tongue tied.
Manipulative lil ass holes
I like the way you think.
Yes me too! Also my former boss used to snigger at me when I was concentrating hard in meetings. This was all pre diagnosis, made me feel confused.
kuze
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'I am that which you seek to destroy'
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