Anxious about university

Post Reply New Topic

I hate the fact that people are meant to be in group and be perfect at social interactions. I will probably have no friends there because i suck at socializing. Have you studied university and how many friends did you have what were your struggles?

I had 0 friends in the five years I attended college. Those were some of the worst years of my life. Please do all you can to do better than me (and perhaps some others).

I was too scared to talk. That was a barrier. Another one was that I struggled with learning so I didn’t have much to contribute in conversations.

I definitely recommend connecting with those with similar interests and focusing on your strengths. Everyone has something to offer to people. Keep learning on how to be neurotypical or masking.

Most people aren't perfect. You don't have to be perfect when socializing. Just make sure you don't say something that's offensive to another person.

What are you studying in University? Congratulations on getting in. It's not easy in the country where you live.

Being a weirdo isn’t always necessarily bad. You just have to make sure to not say anything too off putting or offensive. As long as you seem genuine and well-intentioned. If you act confident (without appearing conceited) and find a way to really “own it” as far as weirdness goes, it could turn out okay! To “really own it”can be a fun thing to experiment and play with. Keep thinking about how your weirdness or outside the box thinking can make you stand out as an individual and how it can contribute to others. A lot to think about and sort out I know. And then there’s still trial and error. It’s complex but time is on our side.

I’m guessing you are in your 20’s. Possible you just have to live through life and just have things suck for a while. 20’s are hard years for everyone. But at the same time: there’s a lot you can do each and every day to improve.

If all else fails: you will find your audience. Even when small. Those people are out there.

I wish the OP would answer us.

Not everybody has negative feelings towards him.

I know what it’s like to be utterly stuck. When you scramble and feel desperate for answers, they do indeed come. At some point. When you want it enough and live life enough, it can happen. It’s a process one has to be very patient with. Find as much meaning as you can along the way.

Some precious lil "people" had the nerve to tell me that they were my "friends", but many of them totally disgusted when I asked them to call me "he" instead of "she". (UCSD 2004)

Plenty of "weird" people have friends

However since Covid you could telecommute

That might be easier

Most NT's wish they were "normal."

Many are not "normal."

I bet you will do well in computer programming. My advice is for you to concentrate on your coursework, and make sure you get decent grades (marks). If you are known as someone that's good in your class, there will be many opportunities to socialize.

Try not to think of yourself as inferior to other people. Because you are not inferior to other people.