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ezbzbfcg2
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05 Oct 2021, 7:49 am

I would caution not to think in black-and-white terms regarding niceness and jerkiness in people.

There are indeed some people who are consistent in behavior: "That little old lady is so kind to everyone...that one guy is a cantankerous blowhard, everyone agrees."

But generally speaking, it's not either-or. We talk about non-binary in regards to gender perception. Truth is, it applies to behavior. Someone may be a complete and total jerk to you, but be as polite as pie to me. Whether or not this person is a jerk would be a matter of opinion or interpersonal experience.

I also think misconceptions are commonplace. Generally speaking, Aspies are more likely to get confused and deeply try to deduce how/why an individual is behaving a certain way. NTs, I find, when confused about another's behavior, will default to "I don't understand, THEREFORE: this person is being hostile!" even if that wasn't the other person's intention.



Jakki
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05 Oct 2021, 9:37 am

Generally i think aspies are kind people but if surrounded by bad people and constant propaganda
and praised for believing propaganda . Then celebrates this with others pushing this propaganda.
Can easily be manipulated into believing all kinds of corrupt ideas, just like anyone else , That is craving acceptance . Even acting on such beliefs .


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magnum233
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11 Apr 2023, 10:15 am

i would say yes we are only whilst we might be smiling on the inside that often wont translate well to body language. In short, many neurotypicals have poor opinions of aspies and autistics because it can look like were grumpy or blunt showing little to no expressions when were actually in a good mood.


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MatchboxVagabond
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11 Apr 2023, 10:23 am

This is going to vary a lot depending upon the person, the situation and what you mean by nice. I am generally pretty nice and easy to deal with when masking or with a cooperative person. I'm also an absolute monster if I'm pushed to the point of having a meltdown and nowhere to retreat. Doubly so if I've got any sort of reasonable defense as to why it's OK in this situation.

I'd wager that is probably fairly common as we often do have some challenges in terms of regulating our emotional state when compared with the NT population.



Dengashinobi
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11 Apr 2023, 10:45 am

Aspies can be nice but it's difficult to be nice when you have social blindness. Sooner or later you are going to step on someone and hurt that person.