Need a good old rant. Anyone else up for it?

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Ade C
Blue Jay
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19 Sep 2021, 10:40 am

I've dropped back in here after a few months away attempting to integrate yet again into a world which is becoming increasingly irritating and confusing. I'm thoroughly sick of trying to operate within the constraints of a neurotypical social structure.
Despite being middle aged and working in an environment which involves interacting with people on a deep psychological level I feel totally disconnected from the human race.
Feel free to continue the theme of my rant or chip in with your own!



Something Profound
Snowy Owl
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19 Sep 2021, 8:24 pm

I get frustrated by the way society seems to operate on certain premises, yet it violates those premises all the time especially in regard to how it treats individual human beings. In theory society works, but in practice it is a mess, and I get tired seeing the disparity between the two, and also get frustrated that everyone seems to think I'm odd for noticing this.

I expect there to be outrage over societal expectation X being presented, but having it be replaced with Y, but people just go on as if that is normal, not seeming to care that this is pretty much untenable and confusing and more than a little irritating.

And then, trying to abide by these "other" rules that seem to be what the world operates by is...well, kinda just exhausting and further irritating.

I do not know how people do it. Day after day, and it is just...expected.

I haven't once felt this "Alien on the Wrong Planet" syndrome before, but perhaps this is what is being referred to...where the world seems to have a facade of rules that it pretends are applicable, but it instead operates by different rules...and I feel like I am the only one who can see this, or cares.



Shellbelle
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19 Sep 2021, 8:34 pm

Ugh, yes! I work in education and it is this boiled down microcosm of society as you are describing and I hate that about it!!
I also feel so confused how everyone operates with such weird optics and double talk. I know I don't really understand NTs, and it is so odd how they say one thing and do another, and then everyone agrees that it is wonderful, but clearly the results imply otherwise. Reminds me of the story, The Emperor's New Clothes. And if anyone points out the Emporer is naked, the messenger is the one who is in trouble.
It is such weird and dysfunctional behavior. I really can't understand it, and hate engaging in what feels like to me, dysfunctional behavior. It really is exhausting.



Ade C
Blue Jay
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20 Sep 2021, 4:37 am

2 very eloquent rants there. Anyone else fed up with other people's BS?



MCPJ
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21 Sep 2021, 8:07 am

I f*****g hate my life right now

I am a full-time waiter working in a busy and large hotel which is too f*****g stimulating, I constantly feel drained and on the brink of a meltdown. I am scared that I will snap and do something I seriously regret. I am sometimes scared of myself or how I feel, like there is no escape from what at the moment feels like mental torture. I have learnt to push this feeling down and am forcing myself to continue regardless as I hope it will turn into a learning opportunity, as I do understand my mind more and am doing things to improve my condition but it does feel very difficult and most days like I am fighting against the world. I feel like I have no off time like I am constantly switched on. I feel like I am building up to a meltdown but like I have no alternatives as I live in a very rural area so there are no easily accessible support services and the alternative living situation is to move back in with my, very-controlling parents, who I feel hold me back in life.

I feel like I have no escape from a very exhausting situation



Shellbelle
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21 Sep 2021, 2:52 pm

That's the worst @MCPJ
Sounds like the first year at my job. I ended up really physically sick from the constant overstimulation. I was a wreck. I don't know how most people cope with all the noise and lights and go, go, go. And talking at each other. It feels insane.
You have a good point about continuing to move forward and not back by going to your parents. You'll expand your capacity with time I hope. If it is encouraging, know I did eventually- not saying every day is rosy, I still have tough days or weeks and even months, but I can get myself through work more consistently now.
Just be as gentle as circumatances will allow. This stuff isn't easy on our systems for sure, but you sound brave and self aware, so you have some good things going for you.



Ade C
Blue Jay
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23 Sep 2021, 10:31 am

MCPJ wrote:
I f*****g hate my life right now

I am a full-time waiter working in a busy and large hotel which is too f*****g stimulating, I constantly feel drained and on the brink of a meltdown. I am scared that I will snap and do something I seriously regret. I am sometimes scared of myself or how I feel, like there is no escape from what at the moment feels like mental torture. I have learnt to push this feeling down and am forcing myself to continue regardless as I hope it will turn into a learning opportunity, as I do understand my mind more and am doing things to improve my condition but it does feel very difficult and most days like I am fighting against the world. I feel like I have no off time like I am constantly switched on. I feel like I am building up to a meltdown but like I have no alternatives as I live in a very rural area so there are no easily accessible support services and the alternative living situation is to move back in with my, very-controlling parents, who I feel hold me back in life.

I feel like I have no escape from a very exhausting situation

Sounds like you're in the wrong job. Until you can change that there's always alcohol!



hariboci
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05 Oct 2021, 6:36 am

I'm fed up with people in general.
I don't seem to fit in to any group, even with autistic people, so I cannot maintain a friendship in the long term, but it's exhausting in the workplace as well. Even though we still work from home,but the daily calls are exhausting, I have no clue what others are doing as I can't focus on their parts and then comes the team buildings. I can mask that I feel good and there are a few moments when I really do, but in general it's boring.

In the bigger picture I don't understand why there is so much hate in the world. The news are full of tragedies, anti LGBTQI, anti women, anti X race s**t, anti Y religion, lies, stealth and ignorance. And most people are too selfish to even talk about it or notice it, they just go on with their life, selfishly ignoring everything that is not directly affecting them.

I guess I need a cave, but at the same time I crave for interactions and like minded people as well.


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You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Ade C
Blue Jay
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05 Oct 2021, 11:34 am

hariboci wrote:
I'm fed up with people in general.
I don't seem to fit in to any group, even with autistic people, so I cannot maintain a friendship in the long term, but it's exhausting in the workplace as well. Even though we still work from home,but the daily calls are exhausting, I have no clue what others are doing as I can't focus on their parts and then comes the team buildings. I can mask that I feel good and there are a few moments when I really do, but in general it's boring.

In the bigger picture I don't understand why there is so much hate in the world. The news are full of tragedies, anti LGBTQI, anti women, anti X race s**t, anti Y religion, lies, stealth and ignorance. And most people are too selfish to even talk about it or notice it, they just go on with their life, selfishly ignoring everything that is not directly affecting them.

I guess I need a cave, but at the same time I crave for interactions and like minded people as well.


Hey, how's it going?



Dear_one
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05 Oct 2021, 12:29 pm

The major traumatic incidents in my life have been about discovering that I had overestimated people's ability to distinguish rationality from rationalization. I have also had a life-long quest to uncover the roots of all our double standards, and now that I want to present my discoveries, I'm being blocked at every turn by people who like the advantages that they currently enjoy without them seeming unjust.



Nyssarbor
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05 Oct 2021, 1:03 pm

I'm tired of how loud everything is in the name of "safety" motorcycles, car engines, beeping noises from construction equipment, ambulances, fire alarms, just to name a few. All these things could be a reasonable volume and still get the point across that something is going on that needs attention. It's actually more dangerous for me because instead of being able to focus in a crisis, I can barely see because the sound is overwhelming my entire brain. I also find it disrespectful to the earth but that's a separate rant. And it's all because of the rigid rules that people put in place as a result of freak accidents. I hate it here and I hate all these horrible artificial noises. Human civilization has created my sensory issues. I have no problem with the sounds of nature, even the loud ones.


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ConfusedFresher
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06 Oct 2021, 4:12 pm

Ade C wrote:
I feel totally disconnected from the human race.
Feel free to continue the theme of my rant or chip in with your own!


I’m 18 and everything is just so very confusing. Same, so much same. It’s so so difficult



Shellbelle
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06 Oct 2021, 6:04 pm

I agree, things can be very confusing.
It isn't easy, and days like today make me want to curl up in a little ball somewhere and just sleep this planet off.



Lady Strange
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06 Oct 2021, 6:47 pm

Shellbelle wrote:
Ugh, yes! I work in education and it is this boiled down microcosm of society as you are describing and I hate that about it!!
I also feel so confused how everyone operates with such weird optics and double talk. I know I don't really understand NTs, and it is so odd how they say one thing and do another, and then everyone agrees that it is wonderful, but clearly the results imply otherwise. Reminds me of the story, The Emperor's New Clothes. And if anyone points out the Emporer is naked, the messenger is the one who is in trouble.
It is such weird and dysfunctional behavior. I really can't understand it, and hate engaging in what feels like to me, dysfunctional behavior. It really is exhausting.


Yeah I totally agree about the "Emperors New Clothes" thing going on. I notice it at work, people fawn all over a certain person and it drives me nuts because the person is a selfish miserable person and sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who doesn't play the game. Can't stand all the games and mind games people do. Sometimes I just really want to get away from society and the headache of trying to figure it all out.


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Figured out in summer of 2020 about 99 percent sure that I have autism (with lots of research and help of my husband and doctor). Cannot get official diagnosis yet (can't find anyone to diagnose adults).


theprisoner
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07 Oct 2021, 6:47 pm

Yeah. Life is Hard. This is Life on Hardmode. It's those blindspots. Thinking your can handle stuff or understand things sufficiently, then getting swerved, things just never go quite as smooth as you would like it.


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Dear_one
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09 Oct 2021, 6:06 am

Rant of the hour: Too many clips on YouTube have robot narrators with totally predictable speech mannerisms and a general inability to pronounce abbreviations correctly. Too many of the others now have synthetic "background" music to trick us into thinking the talk is more interesting than it really is.

Rant of the week: The Experimental Aircraft Association is one of the finest flowers of the American penchant for freedom. It lets people risk their own lives even if there is a remote chance of their accident affecting others. The amateurs have produced some great advances in aviation, doubling many records. What we need now are similar permissions for experimenting with more sustainable transportation and housing. Everything I want to build is mostly illegal to use.