I Am Not Like Most People.
In my 20s I told a friend I had something like a crystal ball that I could see through things. It would be such a relief to call things out as they are instead of the indirectness ("politeness") that's required in NT culture.
My grandmother had some form of synesthesia (she could see words). She was not alone in that, but related to your point she was a minority of a minority. Most people don't have that, but some do (probably higher amongst ASD folks).
My BFF and I share Autism characteristics, but we are very different in many ways. We are alike and we are unalike. So here on this board --- it is the same experience: I relate to some folks with similar ASD characteristics, some folks with similar personality characteristics, and some folks with similar circumstances... But I can't relate completely with anybody (but myself - and that's a stretch).
ThisTimelessMoment
Deinonychus
Joined: 15 Apr 2021
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 324
Location: South Africa
I also seem to have a thought process that can "float" for a while. I think it's related to being able to do "systems thinking" somehow.
I can let the facts float around without needing to define them. Deciding what they are limits them. Naming the thought is limiting the thought. So I can (and often have to) let the ideas be "fuzzy" for a while until my pattern recognition can join the bits together into so.ething I can perhaps put into words.
I believe this is part of why, when someone asks me "what are you thinking" I usually have no answer. There are no words attached to the thoughts so there is nothing I can communicate.
This could also be related to having a short or small working memory. I think, when I'm stressed, I don't manage to connect the thoughts with names for them (words) and that is why I can't think in those situations.
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Ever onwards and upwards!
By using a language that other people also use, i am in a sense already conforming like the most people. I can develop a language of my own that is not spoken by anyone else on the planet, and understood by no one else on the planet, but that makes it very difficult in communicating.
I was dating a lady who said she thought in her own language and then translated it into english. She was my first introduction of what the autism spectrum is. It aas odd because she tried to explain what it is and yet apart from this and rocking back and fore when anxious (I stim in other more subtle ways), everything she tried to tell me seemed normal to me so I could not work out what autism actually was.
When I think deeply I go into picture thinking... When I say picture. It is more like creating a film inside my thoughts which acts out the senario of what I expect to see and do in whatever situation I am thinking about. I also do this to try to comprehend what is said when reading a book or is someone is trying to teach me something so it takes me longer to first visualize a scene to make whatever was said stay in my mind and for me to understand it.
Maths was a problem but I overcame this in my early years by using the dot thinking method and "Patterns of dots" like they appear on dice or more like dominos. It is how I think when doing maths. While I can think in numbers, I find I can visualize the number but I can't do anything much with it unless I can turn it into dots.
It is why I used to have maths teachers in school puzzled how I was mentally thinking as I was not able to show my workings out. I would write down thw answer and then do the workings out to match the answer. I once had a puzzled maths teacher sit with me trying to fathom out how I think and I could not tell him because I assumed my way of thinking is normal, and maybe it is? Who knows?
My Mum is different as she has to write it all out in word form in her mind to add up etc, as she thinks in words.
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Oh wow. I totally use domino dots when I'm doing numbers. I'd tap the dots out on the desk in the correct shape. I've never told anyone that and had no idea 'dot thinking method' was a thing. I thought I invented it!
When I was at school I couldn't learn my times tables by rote the way other kids did. I always had to do the calculation manually every time.
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Was that really necessary?
ThisTimelessMoment
Deinonychus
Joined: 15 Apr 2021
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 324
Location: South Africa
Oh. I am glad it is not just me! The issue I get is wrong answers when I have not taken account that some of my patterns of dots that I am seeing may not be converted over to base 10. Certain more difficult mathematical equasions can make me confused between the patterns of dots that I am converting them to because I may get too many patterns to think about all at the same time where I have to find an order of approach, and at times I can then forget which base each thinking process has when they all come together.
Using letters instead of numbers I find difficult because I do not think in letter forms other then to use the letters to write with... So it adds an extra process to everything in a realm I have to process because when I think in numbers, I convert them into dots, but I can not to this with letters such as "x" because "x" varies in its numerical form, so I am not able to find dot patterns to the equasions of what I see.
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
That subtle self centered grandiosity from constantly detecting others are not as sharp mentally as yourself, i can identify with. And i'm sure others who are high functioning can also. Humans brains are heterogeneous , there are many variations, and possible configurations. As you might be able to tell from my big vocabulary, i think primarily in words. Apart from Linguistics, i'm pretty average in all other areas. Although i have imagined concepts in pictures. But it's not my natural default way of perceiving. I have no idea what this, 'patterns of dots' is to you, and i dont know what's going on inside your head. I have always disliked mathematics. Human thinking styles is uncharted territory and no where near mapped out and fully understood. Consciousness is hard to measure, 'qualia' is amorphous. Only recently has neuroscientist been able to scan peoples brains.
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AQ: 27 Diagnosis:High functioning (just on the cusp of normal.) IQ:131 (somewhat inflated result but ego-flattering) DNA:XY Location: UK. Eyes: Blue. Hair: Brown. Height:6'1 Celebrity I most resemble: Tom hardy. Favorite Band: The Doors. Personality: uhhm ....(what can i say...we asd people are strange)
That's why we're here
Individuals are what we are aye.
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"Subclinical autistic traits" (atypical autism).
Normal intelligence, social and language development.
"vulnerable narcissistic defenses w/ mild borderline traits"; Body Dysmorphic Disorder, (self-diagnosed).
Our internal representation of reality: (http://bit.ly/2BJuj5o)
funeralxempire
Veteran
Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 39
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 25,184
Location: Right over your left shoulder
If it's anything like a county you just need to allow alcohol use.
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"If you stick a knife in my back 9 inches and pull it out 6 inches, there's no progress. If you pull it all the way out, that's not progress. The progress is healing the wound that the blow made... and they won't even admit the knife is there." Malcolm X
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う
If it's anything like a county you just need to allow alcohol use.
Dry humor means "dead pan".
Like Bob Newhart.
The opposite might be over the top, and frenetic, delivery. Like Robin Williams, Sam Kinison, or Richard Pryor.
And...getting bombed in public might actually result in that very change in behavior!
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