Understanding what ppl say... decoding rather

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Joined: 6 Dec 2012
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 11

22 Sep 2021, 11:44 pm

So sarcasm is a way of life in my family, and I use it often. Too much really. But I don't often pick up on it aimed at me. I get anxious talking to ppl bc I don't know how to discern anything beyond the literal words they say or type.

Is it literal? Sarcastic? Passive aggressive? Is there subtext I'm supposed to understand? References to things I don't remember?

Even with good friends I get it wrong all the time. And it makes me sad that talking to them is so stressful. It feels kind of like a test.

I'm just wondering if anyone has found any strategies?

Mona Pereth

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Age: 63
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,639
Location: New York City (Queens)

25 Sep 2021, 8:24 am

I would suggest that you just tell your friends and family that you have difficulty understanding sarcasm and subtext, and that you therefore need people to be precise and literal when talking to you.

To be fair, you should also offer to do the same for any of them who have difficulty understanding your sarcasm/subtext.

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