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hurtloam
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15 Oct 2021, 6:09 pm

I'm still laughing at the "dying on the floor" comment. Like how? My family have good health. What random infliction is this that I can't move my fingers and dial 999?

My Grandad lived alone for the last 20 years of his life. He lived until he was 90. He was probably on the spectrum, but he kept himself busy and made time to visit relatives. He had a good single life.

It's not all doom and gloom and worst case scenarios.

Yeah, American society sucks. The opportunities are limited.

What are you into? What did you study? My job is technical so there are lots of meetups relating to it? There may be that in your field.

I couldn't get a job in my field when I left education, so I got a cleaning job. I was reliable at that and got good references. I got an office job after that and so on.

It isn't failure to look for work outside your field to get your feet in the game.

It's all a game. You've just got to make moves and see where you go. I never planned ahead. I just got on a square and jumped around the board. I feel like men have more pressure to be "successful". I never cared what anyone thought of me. I just made moves to survive and find things I wanted to do.

I'm not Ace. I had a high drive when I was younger. Guys just didn't like me. Would you really try and date 7of9. Seriously?

I got messed around so much men just became less and less attractive and more a total waste of my energy. I've got better things to do.



theprisoner
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15 Oct 2021, 6:20 pm

hurtloam wrote:
I feel like men have more pressure to be "successful".

Quote:
Three times as many men as women die by suicide. Men aged 40-49 have the highest suicide rates in the UK

Yeah men feel that pressure. I suppose when you hit 50 and you're not where you want to be, for whatever reason, that pressure can be too much. Sometimes you never know the reason, They just go off and do it , leave a family behind. I know of once such instance locally.


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dorkseid
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15 Oct 2021, 10:43 pm

hurtloam wrote:
I'm still laughing at the "dying on the floor" comment. Like how? My family have good health. What random infliction is this that I can't move my fingers and dial 999?


A heart attack. An extreme allergic reaction. A stroke. A ruptured appendix. Something heavy falls and hits your head. Nobody ever thinks it could happen to them until it does. The last one doesn't even have anything to do with your health or genetics.

hurtloam wrote:
What are you into? What did you study? My job is technical so there are lots of meetups relating to it? There may be that in your field.


I like collecting comics and action figure and photography. I am studying special education.

I don't know what you mean by meetups. Are you talking about work meetings, or Internet groups related to your field of profession?

hurtloam wrote:
I couldn't get a job in my field when I left education, so I got a cleaning job. I was reliable at that and got good references. I got an office job after that and so on.

It isn't failure to look for work outside your field to get your feet in the game.


I never limited myself to any specific field, unless it was something that I couldn't do well at. For instance, I worked a customer service agent. Answering angry and frustrated phone calls was not something that mixed well with my ASD and anxiety.

I worked as a CNA. It required me to pay $400 out of pocket for classes and certification. It was highly taxing physically and emotionally. And despite that I was paid less than $10/hr. I was regularly asked to work a second overnight shift and then sent home later the same week because I was not allowed to have any overtime. I did well at that job, but was unable to live off of what it paid, and I was too exhausted to work a second job. There was no way to advance without additional school, which I would have to pay for out of pocket. And as I said, I was not making enough to live off of.

I worked at a computer manufacturing plant. I worked on an assembly line. I did well at that job and worked there for 5 years. But there no realistic growth opportunities there.

I worked other random jobs from time to time, like at a warehouse or McDonald's. But never anything that paid well or offered any growth opportunities.

And there were time that I could not get a job, and I ended up homeless a few times. I was never given any consideration for the vast majority of jobs I applied and interviewed for.

hurtloam wrote:
It's all a game. You've just got to make moves and see where you go. I never planned ahead. I just got on a square and jumped around the board. I feel like men have more pressure to be "successful". I never cared what anyone thought of me. I just made moves to survive and find things I wanted to do.


I've never been concerned with what other people thought. What I care about is being successful at a job I don't hate and having the financial means to live well. Of course, that has never happened.

hurtloam wrote:
Would you really try and date 7of9. Seriously?


I remember the show runners openly admitting they casted Jerry Ryan specifically to attract the young heterosexual male demographic.


theprisoner wrote:
Yeah men feel that pressure. I suppose when you hit 50 and you're not where you want to be, for whatever reason, that pressure can be too much. Sometimes you never know the reason, They just go off and do it , leave a family behind. I know of once such instance locally.


Fortunately, I have no family to leave behind.



hurtloam
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16 Oct 2021, 6:03 am

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I remember the show runners openly admitting they casted Jerry Ryan specifically to attract the young heterosexual male demographic.


You know what's funny. I only found that out recently. I just thought she was a cool character. A Borg relearning how to be human was a brilliant idea and I kind of related. I thought her jumpsuit was just to make her look space age and to highlight she still had Borg implants underneath. Doh. I wasn't the target demographic.

But she was not approachable.

My past 2 room mates were nuts and I was glad to be rid of them. I'll take low probability accident and peace over daily annoyance.

Have you moved out of your home town? I was in dead end jobs for years. Moving location helped. Sounds like you've got lots of experience to fall back on which is a really good thing.

Yes, meetups are online these days. I went to a software conference online a few weeks ago. I participated in some workshops and met some nice people.



dorkseid
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17 Oct 2021, 1:40 am

Anyway: just because you are comfortable being single, living alone, or even taking some level of statistical risk; that doesn't mean that I am.



kraftiekortie
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17 Oct 2021, 1:52 am

Statistics don’t mean a damn thing when it comes to dating.



hurtloam
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17 Oct 2021, 6:20 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Statistics don’t mean a damn thing when it comes to dating.


He mean statistics of dying alone in your house. 8O

I more worried about accidents outside. Whenever I go out I leave extra hay and water for my pets just in case.



kraftiekortie
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17 Oct 2021, 6:26 am

You have horses, Hurtloam?

I’m naive enough to believe you might have horses :wink:

It’s autumn, Dorkseid. A great season to walk. How far do you live from your job?



hurtloam
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17 Oct 2021, 6:33 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
You have horses, Hurtloam?

I’m naive enough to believe you might have horses :wink:

It’s autumn, Dorkseid. A great season to walk. How far do you live from your job?


Ha ha, no my pets live in my house with me. They are much smaller than horses. They also like cabbage.

Not sure what area of the US Dorkseid lives in, but is it possible to get the bus to a courty park type place to go for a walk. The trees are lovely around now.



kraftiekortie
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17 Oct 2021, 6:37 am

I believe he’s somewhere not too far from DC and Baltimore.

It’s not hard to walk in residential areas around there….but it’s very difficult to walk in main roads.

Public transportation tends to suck outside of major cities. Even suburbs of major cities have sucky public transportation. The UK does better in this regard.



Itendswithmexx
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17 Oct 2021, 10:16 am

Yah go to bars and chat up women. Duh. It’s fun getting to meet new women. Isn’t it? Exciting? Married people have kids to worry to.

Being single is great if you let it be. Being in a relationship with a good person but someone you don’t love is miserable.



Itendswithmexx
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17 Oct 2021, 10:17 am

How are you too weird? Then get a life job coach? Career coach? Social skills coach. Read self help books. Be fit. Or just be clean and tidy makes a big difference people are so vain and blind to their own shortcomings.



Itendswithmexx
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17 Oct 2021, 10:20 am

Hate to break it to ya, but you’re not the only weird person in this world and they are probably weird too but trying to hide their weirdness by focusing on your apparent “weirdness”. Analyse the f**k out of them and realise they aren’t all that. No one is. People hate in others what they hate in themselves. So be weary not all people are secure of themselves. Or even like themselves. Let alone tolerate or love.



dorkseid
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17 Oct 2021, 12:44 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I believe he’s somewhere not too far from DC and Baltimore.


Way off.



dorkseid
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17 Oct 2021, 1:07 pm

Itendswithmexx wrote:
Yah go to bars and chat up women. Duh. It’s fun getting to meet new women. Isn’t it? Exciting? Married people have kids to worry to.


Last time I went to a bar was on July 4. I was nearly twice the age of every other there. I sat alone for an hour and didn't get any opportunity to talk to anyone other than the employees.



babybird
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17 Oct 2021, 1:11 pm

I love how negative you are. Its such an endearing trait. I'm surprised women aren't just falling over themselves to get to you.


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