Have you detected fear in females around you?

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HeroOfHyrule
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20 Nov 2021, 12:50 am

I don't "sense fear" from the women around me, or really from anyone. People usually think I am much younger than I am due to my height and other factors, so I don't think anyone finds me threatening or worth "fearing". I sense discomfort sometimes though, because I can be awkward to interact with and people often pick up on my anxiety towards them.



cyberdad
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22 Nov 2021, 3:05 am

I went through a phase when women were really scared off me although that might have had something with developing Dutch courage after a bottle of scotch or vodka but I was a walking nightmare and killed conversation as I walked into a room :lol:



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26 Nov 2021, 5:29 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
I don't "sense fear" from the women around me, or really from anyone. People usually think I am much younger than I am due to my height and other factors, so I don't think anyone finds me threatening or worth "fearing". I sense discomfort sometimes though, because I can be awkward to interact with and people often pick up on my anxiety towards them.
I think people tend to be more scared of me when I'm upset about something & having a disagreement with someone. Like when a customer service rep is not doing their job & giving me the runaround & BS excuses. So many people these days get hired for jobs they are incompetent at or just don't give a sh!t about doing rite. Then they get argumentative & upset at a customers when the customer has the nerve to actually expect them to do the job that they are officially hired to do. I'm nice & polite at 1st until I realize they are intentionally screwing me over or not caring at all. I tend to be a passive person & go my own way with things or go along with whatever others want but there are times when I really do need to stand up for myself & I am also extremely protective of romantic partners. I NEVER been violent as an adult but I could snap if anyone were to harm a woman I love. Some women I've made a move on had actually thought I was gay till then :oops: They saw me as a good friend but they never considered me as potential boyfriend materiel :( I really did like being their friend but I tend to become attracted to women after I knew them a bit. It takes time to know someone's personality & develop an emotional attraction. My girlfriend likes to joke that I'm 51% female & she's 51% male so together we make a male & female couple if this makes any sense to you guys :? :lol:


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Rexi
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30 Nov 2021, 11:10 am

nick007 wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
I don't "sense fear" from the women around me, or really from anyone. People usually think I am much younger than I am due to my height and other factors, so I don't think anyone finds me threatening or worth "fearing". I sense discomfort sometimes though, because I can be awkward to interact with and people often pick up on my anxiety towards them.
I think people tend to be more scared of me when I'm upset about something & having a disagreement with someone. Like when a customer service rep is not doing their job & giving me the runaround & BS excuses. So many people these days get hired for jobs they are incompetent at or just don't give a sh!t about doing rite. Then they get argumentative & upset at a customers when the customer has the nerve to actually expect them to do the job that they are officially hired to do. I'm nice & polite at 1st until I realize they are intentionally screwing me over or not caring at all. I tend to be a passive person & go my own way with things or go along with whatever others want but there are times when I really do need to stand up for myself & I am also extremely protective of romantic partners. I NEVER been violent as an adult but I could snap if anyone were to harm a woman I love. Some women I've made a move on had actually thought I was gay till then :oops: They saw me as a good friend but they never considered me as potential boyfriend materiel :( I really did like being their friend but I tend to become attracted to women after I knew them a bit. It takes time to know someone's personality & develop an emotional attraction. My girlfriend likes to joke that I'm 51% female & she's 51% male so together we make a male & female couple if this makes any sense to you guys :? :lol:

Many men seem to give off way more female vibes than females. In fact i often get their gender opposite if they don't talk about it.
I guess societal gender standards are just a mask to hide the truth.
That's odd, there's a message error that i have too few characters in my message to post?

I seem to relate to your gf quite a bit, I'm glad that she is on the spectrum. I wish you'd be together on the site.


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theprisoner
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30 Nov 2021, 11:18 am

Rexi wrote:
Many men seem to give off way more female vibes than females.


Are you talkin about Pepe. Cause the the way he kept simping for you in that thread, did seem a bit feminine. You actually have a bit of masculine vibe.


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CinderashAutomaton
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02 Dec 2021, 5:44 pm

There's a meme about 'Resting b***h Face' that some women have, but I have a bit of a 'Resting Dour Face' when I'm by myself in public. It also translates a bit into body language, so I can sometimes appear to be a tough/mean looking person.

It's scared a few women, which hurts, but I can totally understand it. I'm above average height and often wear heavy jackets and backpacks, so I can end up looking kinda scary. I used to walk through some sketchy areas and have had a bit too much experience with physical bullies so it's only a matter of course that I'm like that.

Funny enough, more than one girl/woman has initiated contact with me because I have a 'kind' face, and many others have said the same thing. When I'm talking with people my face changes drastically from when I'm not currently engaged with anyone.

As far as @jayo's situation...I have no way of knowing since I wasn't there to witness those situations, but there are several reasons that aren't fear that could elicit an avoidance response that may be similar to fear. Many, and probably most people tend to have a bias regarding preference for aesthetic traits in friends and romantic/sexual partners, which is commonly referred to as a person's 'type' (though friend 'types' aren't commonly thought about even though it's a thing).

When it comes to 'types', don't worry about the rejection. There's nothing you can really do about it. Many people even get into relationships with someone they think is great but just isn't type and their relationship fails because one person just can't maintain enough romantic or sexual interest despite being idealogically into the other people.

Also, as others have mentioned, many woman get physically intimidated by big looking guys. It sucks, and neither can the guys help having the body they're born with, nor can the woman do anything between their own size and instincts. Just gotta accept it and move on.

Last thing: Body language is also a pretty subtle thing that a lot of people don't realize can impact a first impression, and for a woman that's out looking to party or date, that can be all the signal they need to decide whether they want to avoid contact or not. It might not seem fair, but it's what they have to do. They often can't be up front about their lack of interest or desire to be left alone because many guys react very badly to that, and it can spoil a woman's night or even set her up for harassment or worse.

Some women might go a bit too far, true, but by and large it's a self-preservation kinda thing to not get embroiled in troublesome or dangerous situations.


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CinderashAutomaton
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02 Dec 2021, 5:51 pm

Rexi wrote:
Many men seem to give off way more female vibes than females. In fact i often get their gender opposite if they don't talk about it.


Trueeeeee

I used to get misgendered online a lot, and even had fun with that for awhile. And that was before I had decided to start presenting more feminine. (I no longer do so, though vestigial artifacts and old habits sometimes pop up)

Funny thing; if you get into this game called VR Chat, you'll find that the most feminine people are usually guys.

It's a very interesting phenomenon and environment.


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Rexi
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04 Dec 2021, 6:42 am

theprisoner wrote:
Rexi wrote:
Many men seem to give off way more female vibes than females.


Are you talkin about Pepe. Cause the the way he kept simping for you in that thread, did seem a bit feminine. You actually have a bit of masculine vibe.

I've never thought about Pepe in that regard. I don't think about it anymore in fact, actively. It doesn't really matter or add up in any helpful way to a person's character. I just know it as in the past it frustrated me. Role reversal sorta. I wanted something different. Someone like me. Dating girls hasn't been any more successful though. So that aspect really doesn't count. My fiance is really good at being with me though, he's a guy. In fact I like female vibes and sensitivity, showing vulnerability now, I highly value it so long as it's genuine. Men are encouraged by society to not show it but I think it's a strength to do.
The other 'feminine' aspects that are positive are they actually open up and talk a long time and it's relaxing, lack of judgement. Girls like to portray a tough exterior, can go both good or bad. Chances are it's bad.


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Rexi
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04 Dec 2021, 6:58 am

CinderashAutomaton wrote:
Rexi wrote:
Many men seem to give off way more female vibes than females. In fact i often get their gender opposite if they don't talk about it.


Trueeeeee

I used to get misgendered online a lot, and even had fun with that for awhile. And that was before I had decided to start presenting more feminine. (I no longer do so, though vestigial artifacts and old habits sometimes pop up)

Funny thing; if you get into this game called VR Chat, you'll find that the most feminine people are usually guys.

It's a very interesting phenomenon and environment.

I've heard of vr chat. My ex is on there. Apparently lots from my old game joined but I wasn't able to because of low comp specs. Might be time to get there see if it's toxic or not. Somehow the old doesn't really settle me, might be people I don't really want to reconnect with. You seem cool though.

RBF is on my face tho whenever I relax but especially when tired. Maybe my face expresses the true disgust I feel for what most people say too because teachers used to jump to the worst conclusions about me.


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RetroGamer87
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11 Dec 2021, 7:40 am

Everytime I walk into a crowded room..

I kid, I kid.


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