Do any of you feel it's hard to please people?

Page 1 of 1 [ 5 posts ] 

catpiecakebutter
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 13 Feb 2020
Gender: Female
Posts: 25

14 Nov 2021, 11:14 pm

I have been looking for a job for while and I have help to try to get one. This week I had a job interview on Thursday and I ask my mom who is better at math than I am, how much money I could possibly based on minimum wage and the possible hours I could be working but she tells me I don't even have the job yet which translates as don't get my hopes up too high. But before when I didn't have an interview this week I told my mom I didn't think I would even get a job and she would think that's being negative. I feel if I'm too positive about this it gets my hopes up too high and if I'm too negative people don't want too hear it. Either way, I can't win with what I say when it's comes to me finding a job. Any suggestions?



Dear_one
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,089
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

15 Nov 2021, 5:39 am

^^ Your example is of one person, your mother, and she does sound self-contradictory. Most people are to some extent, but yours sounds more so than most. There are other people who are very clear, consistent, and easy to please, but they are also rare.



magz
Forum Moderator
Forum Moderator

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2017
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,784
Location: Poland

15 Nov 2021, 5:48 am

This board requires you to be registered and logged-in to view hidden content.


_________________
Let's not confuse being normal with being mentally healthy.


Gebodragon
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 31 Mar 2012
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 7

16 Nov 2021, 9:28 am

I think the best thing is to get over the feeling that you have to please other people. There will always be people in your life--maybe family, or partners, or close friends--whose opinions will matter more to you than others, but in the end, it is yourself whose happiness you are responsible for, and if you can let go of that need to please others all the time--because you can't, it's simply impossible--you will be happier, I think. I'm not saying it's easy to do this--some of us were taught from our earliest days to feel responsible for the happiness of others, or to need the approval of others, and it's a hard thing to let go of. But I find that the more I can do it, the happier and more at peace with myself I am.

Good luck in finding a job that suits you. :)



AnonymousAnonymous
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 62,218
Location: Portland, Oregon

21 Nov 2021, 2:46 pm

@ OP: Best of luck in finding yourself proper employment. :)

BTW, if you are in the US, have you ever considered contacting Vocational Rehab Services
that can help you find work?


_________________
Silly NTs, I have Aspergers, and having Aspergers is gr-r-reat!