Is it reasonable for a 31 year old to be banned fromcaffeine

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Well if an adult is of sound mind and parents or carers aren't legally required to look after you then there's no reason to control what you can and can't eat or drink. I'd understand it if you were a recovering alcoholic and they were helping you to stay away from alcohol, but to stop you drinking tea and coffee? Pure controlment.

Considering they have no respect for you whatsoever and treat you worse than a cow in an slaughterhouse, do you think they're telling the truth about you inheriting the company in the future?

Are you willing to be disowned by your parents too, even if it means being left out of the trust/will/company ownership?

Well you may have a point because they are trying to swindle me out of a lot of my ownership in the company and future companies.Because my dad said that I own the company 100 percent in the initial partnership agreement that was a verbal contract but he changed his mind.I just cant turn down millions so I am not willing to be disowned.I wish I could get my share back in the future but idk of anyway how because I dont want it to be like something straight out of Dallas and Dynasty by fighting my sister in court for control of the company.The lawyers would get everything anyways and I would be estranged from my sister.So I may just have to let my a big part of 100 percent ownership of the company be stolen from me.Mom and dad gaslight me all the time about finances and agreements and then they never honor any of their agreements with me.I have no chance of starting over in the oilfield if I get disowned.I thought I could trust my dad with the oil company.I never thought he would try to steal a lot of it and project on me.

Do you have an actual way of checking your ownership you have in the company? Legally on paper that is?

All I have is a verbal contract but I may have to do a hostile takeover of the company and take back whats rightfully mine after my parents die.I am just going to wait it out for now because the oil wells are depleting quick and the wells may be done in 20 or 30 years by the time my parents go.And then I could just buy my sibling out of the leases after the wells are stripper wells or not flowing anymore but could still be revived at some point in the future depending on if there is going to be secondary and tertiary recovery in the Energy Basin frack wells.Its in my parents name right now because of the 2000 dollar rule although i may be off the 2000 dollar rules soon because I may lose my benefits soon.I heard verbal contract are enforced in Texas possibly but I could get kicked out of the church and get our version of excommunication for suing my parents so I may have to get some elders to settle the dispute at some point.Thats why the estate would be better to sue.Plus i dont think my sibling would be able to hire as good of lawyer as me if push comes to shove.I already have verbal contract made over the phone with my sister to buy out her portion of the company but she does not want to sell and changed her mind despite the agreement.

It doesn't sound like you have any real legal ownership of the company so far. You have to ask yourself, do you want to endure this horrific abuse from your parents for a ownership stake in a company that might go into administration due to changes in oil demand over the coming decades. Not only that but an ownership stake that verbally comes from the mouth of people who are by their nature, dishonest, controlling, abusive, prone to explosive outbursts, have a hatred of anyone vulnerable and willing to exploit your autism to serve their own means?

They see you as low down the pecking order as rats and cockroaches so you need to question them if they're actually going to give you any stake in the business whatsoever.

You said you have control over the company affairs too (unpaid for your work obviously, you can't expect any more from your parents).

Have you thought about just knocking this all on the head and driving the company into the ground? Your parents are using this imaginary stake in the company to control and abuse you so as far as I'm concerned, good riddance to the company. Bankrupt everyone, let them disown you and move on with your life safe in the knowledge they're as bad off as you now.

Good points.We will just have to see how it goes in the energy industry and the company.I wont need them forever in the oil industry possibly because leasing is beginning to open up here for mineral rights so i am just biding my time till I can get my first lease of my own because I nearly got my first one a few months back and my first big lease has the potentional to make me a lot of money so I just invest in my business and get on in my life.

I have some capital saved up for the start-up costs for the land firm but I am trying to convince my dad that wind and solar is the way of the future but he aint having it so I may have to do on my own.I may get a job in the finance space and eventually start my own companies in that space so I dont neccesarily need the oil company ownership to get the life I want.Also I dont think my dad is as good in the oil industry as me because he wants to focus on fracking which tends to not be as profitable and if i had my choice I would stick with buying up existing production and fixxing it up so I may do that on my own and it would prolly be more lucrative potentially than my dads company.I am the visionary of the company like he does not seem to be too concerned getting big in oil.I do know a way to possibly take the company down or at least make it more likely.I could just stop stressing the importance of the right legal entities.He does pay.he pays me 10 bucks a month for company work.I know its not much but at least it a little bit.

Like if oil does not work out for me I can be a banker and live the life I want and have more stability than the energy industry potentially.But right now the LLC is set up to be divided essentially equally between me and my sibling.I am used to having no discretionary income so maybe I would be fine without their help as long as I had roof over my head and I could eat peanut butter.It got so bad the other night that I ran away because I wanted to teach my dad a lesson and I told him that someday he may never see me again if it gets to that point again.My dad makes me so sad a lot of the time.He has made me cry so many times.I just wish he wasnt affable to others it seems like because everybody would take his side and i would get blamed for everything.I know a friend that could teach me to hire landmen and then I would be set for life if it got a good productive lease of my own and I would have enough money to live anywhere in town.

Out of interest, is this money you have to put towards business entirely yours to do as you please without your skid stain parents having any say or control over?

Maybe a different therapist would be more justified than the current therapist

Your caffeine restrictions sound unreasonable.

However, your parents are under no obligation to be reasonable.

They can do whatever they want in their house

Unless you move out

It seems like the use housing and inheritance in an abusive manner to deny you agency. Obviously removing yourself from that situation would entail significant risk but you're entitled to not be abused and treated like a small child.

No-one else experiences life as you do(though some may be found right here). They cannot know what you need. when you need it. My experience is that we each learn what benefits us best and this can change on a daily basis. There are no blueprints on what works, what does not for each and every individual on this Wrongplanet. You NEED to “do you”.

I wish I could but my parents prevent that.I feel like I am in jail in my parents house with no agency.I would leave but I dont have the money.

Ya I wish I wasnt treated poorly a lot of the time.I wish I could have the freedom of an adult and not be treated like a 5 year year old every day.I wish my parents did not control every aspect of my life when I am over 30.

well I wont need a lot of money at all theoretically to start my own oil and gas land speculation business.Theoretically I wont need to put any of my own money towards paying the landowners for drilling rights to their land.if things go as planned.It does not even need to be a big ranch.I would be fine with a 160 acre ranch or farm because I could get 4 wells on it possibly.5 percent to 25 percent ownership of 4 wells would be more than enough money to get my life on track.However I would flip the lease to a driller for a profit and keep the wells so I could be free at that point.It would be even better if i could get a big ranch because they could possibly drill a whole lot more wells.I thought I was going to lease a huge ranch but it fell through.I dont have control over any of my bank accounts because of the 2000 rule.I am not allowed to use my debit card.

People accept abuse all the time. I do, and apparently you do. Deep down we know it's not right, but it seems like a small price to pay, as the water starts to boil around us (the frog in the pot analogy). At my workplace, once I noticed I was in boiling water, I did my darndest to make it better from within; I gave it years of asserting myself and it did improve, but not enough. In the meantime, asserting myself helped build my confidence. In my personal relationship I am doing the same - my husband is emotionally detached which was good (he was nonreactive to colossal meltdowns), but bad (he was nonreactive to my suffering). Now that I am more self aware and assertive, I don't "need" his emotionally detachment anymore and am kindly demanding a shift in our dynamic (this after over 20 years together). I firmly believe this will make him and I both better, healthier, happier human beings.

So, if you are in a Catch-22, if you accept his control, your self esteem will continue to deteriorate and truly you will not be able to live well on you're own. If you don't accept his control, you are afraid you will be kicked out (and worse) before you are ready (or able). Perhaps a moderate solution is to kindly assert yourself - keeping in mind it's better for BOTH of you --- you want to meet your need for independence and self direction and meet his need for whatever he is afraid of ---- what is he afraid of? Ironically, might he be afraid to lose you? (even in the face of kicking you out ---- people are super weird that way)

After reading a few posts into this thread, one thing became clear to me: none of this is about caffeine. The caffeine is just an excuse to exercise control. I think you and your parents are in a head-locked battle over who controls your life.

When we've talked before I've worried about what they know about you that I may not; that there could be potential good reasons for limiting your choices; that they might be trying to keep you safe.

But if they use that line about throwing you out, if they constantly play that type of emotional abuse game, then they aren't acting in concern for your best interests. Your best interests would NEVER involve making such comments and threats. They are trying to control and mold you into some vision they have in their heads that has nothing to do with you becoming your best self.

That kind of environment is toxic to live in.

When it comes to caffeine itself, neither of my adult children consume it anymore on the advice of their doctors. I would have wondered if you had received advice from your doctor that you either were ignoring or not aware of if the control issue wasn't glaring me in the face. Many minor health issues are dramatically improved with the removal of caffeine.

I would like you to find a transitional group living situation for autistic adults. It won't be in your small town; so be it. Do your research and find disability and support services that can help you both with planning and funding. I want to know who you can be without this worry and obsession over money. As long as that worry and obsession continue, their control game is in the bag, they've got the power. If separating from their control means a simple and small life on disability, so be it. The kind of control game they seem to be playing will make someone go crazy, and that would be waste of everything you might be able to be. You can't become who you are meant to be while this battle overrides.