Autistic adult not getting help leading to tragic ending

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League_Girl
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13 Dec 2021, 3:27 pm

When kids know there are no consequences, they keep doing it. Like if they know about unconditional love and know their mom would never send them away and will always love them, they abuse them by hitting them and stuff knowing they will never be rejected or pushed away but this is where I draw the line. I even told my son of he ever hit me again. I may call the police and have him arrested for assault and he can seriously hurt someone if he hits. I am getting him ready for the real world and not letting him get into any bad habits and I don't want a violent teen when he becomes one and when he enters puberty. We even told him kids go to juvi hall for assault. My kid needs to know unconditional love stops when abuse starts so he knows where the line is drawn.


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blitzkrieg
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17 Dec 2021, 2:55 am

Male suicide is extremely high in male Autistic populations. Nobody likes the average Autistic dude. You have to do something really special to stand out & have to go 'the extra mile'.

NT's of either 'sex' don't like Autistic males. Autistic females don't typically like Autistic males.

The social hierarchy goes like this from a socialist perspective:

NT females
NT males
Autistic females
Autistic males

Not sharing the burden of capitalism is a good thing. Not earning worthless, spiritually empty, symbolic money is a good thing.

Nobody should want to earn as much money as men as a true female.

If you are participating in capitalism, then you need to worry about it. If not, just be you.



League_Girl
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17 Dec 2021, 3:03 pm

blitzkrieg wrote:
Male suicide is extremely high in male Autistic populations. Nobody likes the average Autistic dude. You have to do something really special to stand out & have to go 'the extra mile'.

NT's of either 'sex' don't like Autistic males. Autistic females don't typically like Autistic males.

The social hierarchy goes like this from a socialist perspective:

NT females
NT males
Autistic females
Autistic males

Not sharing the burden of capitalism is a good thing. Not earning worthless, spiritually empty, symbolic money is a good thing.

Nobody should want to earn as much money as men as a true female.

If you are participating in capitalism, then you need to worry about it. If not, just be you.


I think you made this post in the wrong thread because this is about a man with severe autism who had behavior he was beating his mother she died from head injuries from it. They said he had the mentality of a two year old but the story doesn't add up what the OP posted. Either the parents were in deep denial about his disability or he was a master manipulator. He could have been a savant so that would explain why he seemed intelligent.


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Summer_Twilight
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17 Dec 2021, 3:28 pm

League_Girl wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
How many of you recall the Issy Stapelton story? It was the one where her mother tried to take her life as well as her own back in 2013.

Basically, Issy turned violent after she reached adolescence and especially towards her mother and sister. That said, there are a few things.

1. Kelly Stapelton attempted to "Cure" Issy's autism through learning how to practice ABA on her daughter instead of going and finding a therapist.
2. When she attempted to seek help for Issy, after she got violent, professionals would give her specific instructions on how to make home life better. Still, she didn't listen and the violence continued
3. Her mother had a history of mental illness and other issues of her own

That said, there are people on the spectrum who are naturally violent and Issy was one of those


I have heard 3 different versions of it like she was 2 when she started to hit her mom and then it was 8 years of age and then 11. I assume they might have meant when her aggression changed and then it became deadly at 11 years of age when she gave her mom a head trauma. Why she wasn't removed from her home is beyond me.

It's rare for a kid so small to cause an injury to an adult. My son once almost pushed me down the stairs when he was 3 and I nearly lost my balance. He only gave me a nudge and I was pregnant so my balance was off. It would have been an accident if it happened and I lost the baby.

Kelli seemed to be black and white and stubborn and they both had problems. Those two should not have been left alone.

I also think Issy had more going on because autistic people don't resort to violence when they don't get their way or try and run their mom off the road by grabbing a steering wheel or pushing them down thd stairs because their mom wasn't responding to their demands fast enough or even target 1 person that doesn't fend for themselves. She did use to attack her brother but backed off when he knew how to fight her so she went after her mom and younger sister. They were both smaller than her.


What mental illness do you think Issy had?



League_Girl
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17 Dec 2021, 4:17 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
How many of you recall the Issy Stapelton story? It was the one where her mother tried to take her life as well as her own back in 2013.

Basically, Issy turned violent after she reached adolescence and especially towards her mother and sister. That said, there are a few things.

1. Kelly Stapelton attempted to "Cure" Issy's autism through learning how to practice ABA on her daughter instead of going and finding a therapist.
2. When she attempted to seek help for Issy, after she got violent, professionals would give her specific instructions on how to make home life better. Still, she didn't listen and the violence continued
3. Her mother had a history of mental illness and other issues of her own

That said, there are people on the spectrum who are naturally violent and Issy was one of those


I have heard 3 different versions of it like she was 2 when she started to hit her mom and then it was 8 years of age and then 11. I assume they might have meant when her aggression changed and then it became deadly at 11 years of age when she gave her mom a head trauma. Why she wasn't removed from her home is beyond me.

It's rare for a kid so small to cause an injury to an adult. My son once almost pushed me down the stairs when he was 3 and I nearly lost my balance. He only gave me a nudge and I was pregnant so my balance was off. It would have been an accident if it happened and I lost the baby.

Kelli seemed to be black and white and stubborn and they both had problems. Those two should not have been left alone.

I also think Issy had more going on because autistic people don't resort to violence when they don't get their way or try and run their mom off the road by grabbing a steering wheel or pushing them down thd stairs because their mom wasn't responding to their demands fast enough or even target 1 person that doesn't fend for themselves. She did use to attack her brother but backed off when he knew how to fight her so she went after her mom and younger sister. They were both smaller than her.


What mental illness do you think Issy had?


Perhaps ODD. I knew a kid with it and he also would use aggression to get his way and he really hurt his mom. He appeared sweet when he knew there would be a consequence but if he thought he can get away with it, he would get abusive to get his way. I also think some was learned behavior because he didn't act that way with his dad.

I wouldn't go far to say she was a psychopath.
I also find it messed up and disturbing that Kelli never seems concerned about other people and her daughter around Issy. If I were her, I would be more concerned about how violent my kid is and other people around her than being all happy about being in jail because no more being beaten by your kid. I mean jeez, it makes her look bad and why the judge gave her a harsh sentence. Plus she had been warned by her lawyers that going on the Dr. Phil show will hurt her case and she didn't listen. If I were her, I would have listened because they are the experts and trained and studied and know how the court systems work. Pretty arrogant to assume you know more than someone who is actually trained in law and studied and went to law school. Why have a lawyer in the first place you know. She was probably exhausting to work with.


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Summer_Twilight
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18 Dec 2021, 8:24 am

Thanks, Issy also could have been very spoiled and was used to getting her way.

Kelli has some serious problems of her own. She had some disturbing videos on YouTube.



League_Girl
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18 Dec 2021, 3:29 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Thanks, Issy also could have been very spoiled and was used to getting her way.

Kelli has some serious problems of her own. She had some disturbing videos on YouTube.



I also read somewhere where she was planning on going to go to McDonalds with her friends but she didn't have a ride and had no way of getting there so she tears up the whole house. I have no idea what that means but I imagined punishing walls, throwing things off shelves and everything and I wondered "why didn't she just do that to her own stuff?"

What stuff did Kelli have on youtube, only stuff I saw was her own injuries Issy caused and injuries her doctors had and her being beaten by her daughter who was 11 at the time. Her mother was screaming and I wondered why wasn't she restraining her daughter and on top of her. Maybe she was afraid to fend for herself fearing she would have been charged with child abuse if Issy had marks on her skin from self defense.


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Summer_Twilight
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26 Dec 2021, 3:18 pm

If you go to Kelli Stapleton’s YouTube page, it shows you.

As for having no ride to McDonald’s, wow.



Jakki
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18 Jan 2022, 10:30 pm

It is a truley sad story .. and with the information that was available at the time, and now still only slightly better .
Having been the sibling of my non verbal sister , whom I witnessed became violent after repeated exposures to violence by my older brothers , whom liberally used the same on me. My mother was operating in overwhelmed mode, And reacted with her own forms of violence towards me at the behest of my older brothers whom blamed me for all the damage or theft that was going on in the house. Resulting. In additional violence on me. My non verbal sister I could not watch out for cause, I was just trying to survive and I would often find ways to hide from the family on our little residential home . They had been locking me in a closet on and off for over a year. When a cousin and her mother came to visit, and. In a solitary conversation alone with my niece I asked her what she did , when she was locked in a closet, and how she might avoid it . She said she was never locked in a closet. Apparently this got back to her mother after they left . Suddenly , that did not happen anymore but that did not stop physical beatings.
Then my younger NT brother was borne and focus was on him , but he suffered no bad situations . Then my sister was borne and she did not progress . She learned violence .My older brothers did what they wanted and inflicted physical beatings on her . She even attacked me once , unprovoked. But instead of a closet , my mom had her sit at the base of the couch my mother laid on eventually learn to do huge jigsaw puzzles in short period of time .
And myself although I was older now. And hiding in the garage at night with a blanket and a soft pad. And my parents allowed that. This circumvented my beating by almost 75% . I was in school and getting passing grades
With absolutely no effort.The older brothers did much better at the same school .As I got into high school , I made friends with the gifted students class people after several years of no friends. One of my lifelong friends was a pharmecuetical tech in training and explained drugs to me, and how to research them. A non verbal child cannot express when they are feeling out of control or when they are in withdrawals from a drug.As my sister was.
Then one day found thorozine in my parents med cabinet, And found it was being used on my little sister by my mom, cause mom could not handle the violence my sister had used to get her way. I knew what Thorazine was, early on. That and haldol are used as chemical restraints on violent people .
After I explained how powerful of a drug it was. My mother started finding other ways to placate her youngest daughter . Softer meds, better doctors . And joined with other parents .And formed the Los Angeles first AARC.
Association for autistic and ret*d children. And was a staunch supporter until she became too old and did pay 50,000 dollars to put my sister in a unknown group home.After my father had died, using his life insurance money.
That was in the late 1970s and 80s . Am surprised that in the 1990s the world had not found better ways to deal with
Autistic persons. So the above story has me wondering what Sky grew up with that caused violence.And hit close to home. Creatures usually learn the things they have lived with. Perhaps this may give alittle insight to the above story. But not everyone is the same, these are just my first hand experiences in a possibly similar situation.


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txfz1
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18 Jan 2022, 11:02 pm

I had missed this thread. Thank you for sharing your story and the bump. WP has raised my own awareness, how lucky I am even though I wasn’t diagnosed, and opened my thinking how the huge the difference there is between people in the spectrum.