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Kitty4670
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02 Jan 2022, 4:30 am

I’m talking to a guy on my dating site, he’s Handsome! He has blue eyes, my fave color, he’s 37. We met 6 days ago, he wants to meet me, I would love to meet him, but I can’t, 1. I want to go slowly, 2. There is the Covid, 3. It’s soooo hard for me to walk alot, I have bone pain in my ankles & my feet has tightness. And number 4. I’m not vaccinated, I want to be vaccinated, but I can’t do it on my own. I haven’t told him about my Cerebral Pasly, Aspergers, Psoriasis & other things. I wanted to tell him, he haven’t been online too much. I’m going to lose him when I tell him. Why everything have to be sooooo hard with me?


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HighLlama
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02 Jan 2022, 5:54 am

This is the hardest part of dating, I think: meeting all the people who don't accept you. Of course, some are accepting and realize you just aren't right for each other.

For love, we have to meet many rejections, whether just or not. Anything else is just housekeeping.



kraftiekortie
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02 Jan 2022, 6:08 am

Please get vaccinated as soon as possible.



dtcyankee
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02 Jan 2022, 8:28 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Please get vaccinated as soon as possible.

Pretty sure she can make that decision on her own without you telling her



kraftiekortie
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02 Jan 2022, 10:18 am

I’m pretty sure she could, too.



Nades
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02 Jan 2022, 10:32 am

Why can't you get vaccinated on your own? This sounds suspiciously catfishy to me too.

Why don't you arrange to meet him ASAP? How receptive someone is when asked to meet is by far the best way of sorting out time wasters and cat fishers. I think you need to meet up in person considerably more often than you do.



Kitty4670
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04 Jan 2022, 12:26 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Please get vaccinated as soon as possible.


I will get vaccinated when I can, it’s hard for me, I can’t walk too good now, didn’t you read what I wrote?


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Kitty4670
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04 Jan 2022, 12:34 am

Nades wrote:
Why can't you get vaccinated on your own? This sounds suspiciously catfishy to me too.

Why don't you arrange to meet him ASAP? How receptive someone is when asked to meet is by far the best way of sorting out time wasters and cat fishers. I think you need to meet up in person considerably more often than you do.


Didn’t you read what I wrote? I need help. And I can’t meet him. Once again didn’t you read what I wrote?


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Nades
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04 Jan 2022, 3:44 am

Kitty4670 wrote:
Nades wrote:
Why can't you get vaccinated on your own? This sounds suspiciously catfishy to me too.

Why don't you arrange to meet him ASAP? How receptive someone is when asked to meet is by far the best way of sorting out time wasters and cat fishers. I think you need to meet up in person considerably more often than you do.


Didn’t you read what I wrote? I need help. And I can’t meet him. Once again didn’t you read what I wrote?


I did. I still don't understand why some alternative arrangements can't be made.



Kitty4670
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06 Jan 2022, 4:16 am

Nades wrote:
Kitty4670 wrote:
Nades wrote:
Why can't you get vaccinated on your own? This sounds suspiciously catfishy to me too.

Why don't you arrange to meet him ASAP? How receptive someone is when asked to meet is by far the best way of sorting out time wasters and cat fishers. I think you need to meet up in person considerably more often than you do.


Didn’t you read what I wrote? I need help. And I can’t meet him. Once again didn’t you read what I wrote?


I did. I still don't understand why some alternative arrangements can't be made.

Like what?


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Nades
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06 Jan 2022, 5:16 am

Kitty4670 wrote:
Nades wrote:
Kitty4670 wrote:
Nades wrote:
Why can't you get vaccinated on your own? This sounds suspiciously catfishy to me too.

Why don't you arrange to meet him ASAP? How receptive someone is when asked to meet is by far the best way of sorting out time wasters and cat fishers. I think you need to meet up in person considerably more often than you do.


Didn’t you read what I wrote? I need help. And I can’t meet him. Once again didn’t you read what I wrote?


I did. I still don't understand why some alternative arrangements can't be made.

Like what?


I dunno really. For the vaccine call the health services in the area, they're certain to be able to provide you with one somehow. They deal with people who struggle to move all day every day.

As for meeting a guy, you could possibly invite him to visit you near where you live. If you genuinely believe you can't meet him or any other guy however then why waste his/their time by talking to them in the first place?



OrangedApple
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06 Jan 2022, 6:52 pm

I see two issues here .. youve got quite a lot going on that you haven't told him & maybe should start disclosing some of the ones which will be apparent when you first meet .

If hes decent he will wont mind as much as you think he will , he'll respect that youve been honest I doubt hes perfect anyhow .

2. There are niche dating sites specifically aimed at ppl with disabilities. .. getting to know someone on one of these sites would remove a lot of angst around the possibility of rejection.

3. I dont wish to sound horrible but when it comes to potential 'deal breaker stuff' honesty is always the best policy , otherwise how can you trust them or they you? Wrong footing to get off on.
I had a similar with a friend of mine , she asked me to join her at a speed dating event later this month & I was up for it.

Then when I saw the age group wasnt applicable to us . 43 - 55 were're 57 /58 .. then she told me she usually takes at least 3 yrs off her age.

I said count me out ..its deception..from the word go.
Horses for courses I suppose , but If I would arrange to meet until youve had a chance to tell him a bit more about yourself..if you truly have a connection..he will only respect you for it.

:) Goodluck!


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DW_a_mom
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06 Jan 2022, 10:12 pm

I am sorry things are hard. Life really isn't fair, is it?

I wonder if you can prepare him for the disclosures by letting him know you have medical conditions that make meeting in person difficult, and that you also worry will make him lose interest. That may allow you to slowly ease into a more honest conversation, although no one can guarantee he won't run for the hills even with that little information.

You can't have a real relationship without being your full, real self. Alternatively, while playing at the edges and having a light and flirty relationship is fun and less in need of full disclosure, there is only so long one can keep that up. Either way, you eventually have to take a risk of some sort. No, it is not easy.


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AprilR
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06 Jan 2022, 11:56 pm

i also think it's best to be honest about who you are from the start without getting too attached. Otherwise if you get too close it might hurt you even more. I hope everything goes well



blitzkrieg
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07 Jan 2022, 7:41 am

Yeah, be honest from the start. If you don't tell them, then that can backfire for sure.

When I was young & foolish I hid things at the beginning about my disabilities' when dating, but that can go wrong in so many ways it's not even funny.


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