Of course.

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Here's a lurvely video of the neighbourhood I hope he gets sick of asap and decides to make moves to get out of & then only return once in a blue moon to say hi to old friends and grab a couple scoops of ice cream or whatever once he knows he can refrain from relapsing:

https://vancouversun.com/news/crime/vid ... eet-market


Visitors and tourists are shocked to see that this place exists in the same city as $$$$$$$$ homes and supercars. It is pretty wild.. several blocks of chaos, drugs, homelessness, violence, tent cities etc.

It was noticeably colder this morning - coldest morning this year.. and it's been ridiculously dry - we've had such an extended summer. More very warm days ahead, but for his sake I welcome cold rainy weather.. as I think that'll make life much more uncomfortable in that neighbourhood and life and be a major motivator to go to detox/treatment. It'll suck if it is for countless others at the same time and then wait lists are even longer.

All we can do is wait and be supportive when he reaches out. Myself, his family, his friends - which I met one of his friends the other night; another trans guy. He came over for a drink and conversation - it was like a seamless extension of our messenger chats. Talked a bit about him, but mostly about work things as well as his relationship issues with his partner. But it was nice to meet him in person And I think I made a reasonably good impression on him.. which is good if his friends like me.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Feel free to clarify.


Went and donated clothes last night and inquired about some art. Ran into & met graffiti artist Smokey Devil doing a mural and talked with him and his helper, a guy I've chatted with on messenger for months but never met, and Smokey recognizes his picture and sees him around. Knows where he's staying, who he hangs out with, what he does for money etc - which I knew most of those things so I know he's got the right guy. Says he last saw him about 5 days ago and he looked alright. Nice to have any updated at all while he's not in a head space where he wants to talk.

Side note, I saw a few pieces from a locally famous artist and one of them I really liked but it's very tall.. like approx 1' wide by 8 or 9' tall painted on a rough cut piece of corrugated plastic. It's called 'How many homies does it take to change a light bulb?' and is a human tower up a lamp post - it looks pretty cool. I've seen another one like it at a friends place in a smaller format and now I wonder if it's the same artist as apparently this is one of his famous pieces - I guess he's done a few. If I can find a wall to put it on in my parents home I might just go buy it. I do want to collect a few of his pieces.. he's not called Vancouver's Van Goh for nothing - and also, he's over 45 years old and a daily fentanyl user - he will die someday and then there's no more new art to consider buying. It was neat to meet the guy who knows him and even though he can't promise a commission he Can relay the message of what I want painted for my brother and then if the guy decides to paint it I'll be able to go get it from the contact I know whereas the artist himself will sell it on his way to deliver it lol because he's just that impulsive when it comes to cash for drugs.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Went and bought a painting tonight. People see him around, say he looks good/clean (I expected that) & he’s typically hanging with some girl they assume is his girlfriend. Never know, maybe, but could just be that they’re street friends and work together (crime) for cash for their habits/he’s looking out for her. I dunno -> he’s hung out with girls before regularly that he’s not dating and wouldn’t sleep with but Is neighbourhood friends with, so I can see how it might not be a dating thing but others could perceive her to be his girlfriend if they’re always seen together. (Apparently she looks like she’s going downhill fast.)

Regardless, whatever is, is, can’t change it. Just wish he’d call me and communicate vs not. A few different addicts/ex-addicts/front line workers each independently said about the exact same thing: He’s not communicating with you or family because he’s ashamed of slipping and being in such active addiction mode and doesn’t want to talk about it or the time that’s passed and him breaking commitments etc. I get that but it still sucks not to hear from him.

Supposed to be another few good weather days (we’ve had a Really long nice streak.. almost drought compared to typical rainfall) and then Friday it starts raining for a week. I’m kinda hoping the change in weather spurs him into making different choices.. like going to detox. I don’t Know, but I’d imagine that once it starts pissing rain it starts getting a whole lot more difficult to make cash selling goods at the street market.. and if easy cash dries up, then maybe he’ll make different choices and make his next attempt to get clean/sober.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Glad he is doing well enough to be clean and active.
You are a dedicated friend to him.

Went dtes to buy another painting my friend wants. That guy wasn’t around, but I bought a different painting from another artist.

Chatted with a nice knowledgeable girl for a while. Her friend saw my friend about an hour and a half earlier - I was probably on the other side of the street somewhere at that time.

She was the 5th or 6th person to say the same thing: he’s not calling because he’s ashamed. She recommended calling and leaving messages once a week so he’s reminded I still care even if his parents shut him out while he’s using. It’d been 6 days so I left a message this eve and said I’d be in town til 11 or midnight if he calls, and am working in town thurs-sun. Maybe he’ll call, maybe he’ll wander by this block again tonight or tmw -> this is where he makes cash to fuel his habit.

Sucks I haven’t seen him, but nice to know he’s alive and well. Also, even though they can’t say he’s staying there, from the words the person said when I called and left a message I know he’s still staying there and they’re expecting to see him something tonight to relay a message. Also a good sign.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

One young man who sometimes stays at the same place almost teared up and cried as he was getting emotional over the fact that I’d phone and leave a message once a week even if he’s high as a kite and not wanting to talk to anyone.. said that’s very thoughtful and he’d feel pretty good knowing someone cared if someone called to leave a message for him once a week.

Sooo, approx once a week I’ll leave another message I guess.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Came dt to pickup a painting. It won’t fit in my car. Gotta borrow my dads truck in a couple days.

Hanging out seeing if I spot him. It’s good that regular locals see him around 2-3x/day and I got a great tip on when and where I might spot him this early eve so I’m gonna hangout and see, probably stick around til 9 or so then run an errand or two omw home as I have things to do all day tmw.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I must have been asked if I was a cop like at least 10x today.

Tall fit white guy with clean looking teeth hanging out on one of the biggest drug sales corners in the worst neighbourhood. I get it.

It was mostly dealers that asked me and so I transparently told them I came down to buy a painting & stuck around to see if my friend who’s out of touch with his family wanders by and showed them pics of him. Most were super cool, one group kept questioning me.. asking if I had a badge or a wire.. I literally lifted my shirt to show them I didn’t and wasn’t wearing a vest/showed them the contents of my pocket and they still kept insisting I was a cop. Others told them I was cool, so relax.

Later on one dealer warned me the later evening dealers aren’t so nice.. I was about ready to leave anyways as I had things to do on a schedule so I headed out.

Nope, didn’t spot him. He could have popped by briefly when it was super busy and I missed him, or maybe he never came by. But one weed dealer across the street said he passes by 2-3x/day.

A least I know he’s alive. I’m gonna be pretty busy the next few days, especially tmw. Gotta borrow a truck and go pick up and deliver a painting, too, because it was too large to fit in my car or trunk sooo yeah I’ll be back to that hood in a couple days anyways.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Please be careful. I would take such warnings seriously.

Also, it may be that he knows when and where you are when you pass through. If he is ashamed he may stay out of sight?

Well yeah, and I did - was about time to leave anyways as I had something to do at 10pm. I've been around there Very Late, almost all night, before.. but never hung out in one area like that as I was wandering around. Others there told ppl I'm not a cop I was drinking a beer with them ffs lol which was good. And I had no problem proving I'm not wearing a vest or a wire etc. But still, if there are violent people Right There at that hour I don't Need to be there.

Possible he spotted me and avoided me, also possible he came by when I was distracted or had gone to pay for parking or whatever. Also possible he didn't come by for a variety of reasons. Just wish he'd call/meet/talk - that's the hard part, no communication at all with anyone.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I wandered some (well lit) alleys in the DTES the other night mostly just to check out the graffiti (but also to take a piss as there are no public washrooms open late - which is nuts, so, all the alleys smell like urinal.) and noticed some murals done by one of the street residents who was painting a Happy Halloween sign on a pizza box earlier in the day. The guy does have some talent.

I also took notice of several pieces by 'Boy,' who's art I'd seen around town before but didn't know who he was (never met him) until I saw him in an acquaintances' fb post and video as the guy I know was trying to get him medical help for his mental health. He was spiralling straight down and was delusional and suicidal - had tried to do enough drugs to die and failed etc. He was taken to a couple different hospitals that week, 3-4 weeks ago, but ended up passing away a week or so ago. From one comment I read it may have been congestive heart failure as he had it and didn't take care of himself via diet. Not really sure, I didn't ask, but a Lot of people know that Boy died, just like people knew that Jumbo died.


There's a funeral for him tomorrow eve at a DTES bar I've never been to called Funky Winker Beans that's just a couple blocks from the epicentre of all the crazy action. I'm thinking about attending even though I never met him, just because I know a lot of ppl that did - and out of respect for the guy and his art (he put 1930's style pie eyes on everything - kinda neat!) As Well As to have an excuse to visit the hood nearby and leave a message for my MIA friend that I'll be in the area tmw eve if he's game to hangout and catch up. Hmmm, maybe.. I do want to talk to him, but I don't want to be annoying leaving frequent messages.


I'll probably end up down there tdy. Gotta call my friend Cindy and see when she's home tdy. I bought a painting on her behalf but it was too big to fit in my car sooo I gotta borrow my dad's truck and zip down there and across town to deliver it. I *could* just keep his truck for the day/night, but probably will bring it back then drive my car to the beach or wherever - another drop off to make there but I gotta hangout til I see the guy (a metal detector I bought him on amazon) and I don't really want to have my dad's truck out just in case I do get a call from my friend and then want to park in a rough neighbourhood at night.. rather risk my car than his truck kind of thing, even if it ends up costing me like 50 bucks for gas today just to drive into town twice.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I saw him briefly on the sidewalk tdy. He’s alive, that’s good. He brushed me off by saying he was in a rush and he’d talk to me later.

(As per a few subject matter experts I consulted with tdy) 100% he’s ashamed I saw him there to sell merch and buy the drugs he was on a mission for. Still hard not to take it personally that he didn’t even wanna talk to me. :/

Left a message where he stays saying it was good to bump into him, call me lots to catch up on.. @beach tonight & Funky’s tmw for Boy’s funeral.

Maybe he’ll call, but not likely. I accept that the next time I hear from him will be on his timeline, not mine.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

@ Boy’s funeral at this funky bar in the hood called Funky Winker Beans. Not expecting a call or text from him nor for him to show up, but still if he did it’d be amazing.

There’s a couple ppl here I know at least. One used to be a bar customer of mine and he’s a total character.. obsessed with BMX bikes and music. He’s 50 and been to more than 12,000 concerts and back stage at many because he just finds a way even though he’s on disability and very poor. Such a positive attitude.

The other is a homeless guy I recently met that lives at the beach. He’s pretty cool. Says he can’t keep a job due to brain damage from being beaten by the HA and he’s got a bunch of titanium in his forehead and cheeks to fix up the 40 something bone breaks - which is true and real I felt the titanium screw near his eyebrow through his skin. Very interesting character.


I made an anonymous post on a fb group asking for comments from addicts/recovering addicts and each that’s responded has the same thing to say as the dozen or so ppl that have commented irl: Shame/he’s ashamed. That’s why he’s not communicating with me or his family. It’s comforting to know there’s pretty much a complete consensus that that’s the case. Makes me feel better that it’s him and how he feels, not me or anything I’ve said or done.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Titanium face guy and I played a game of pool - he's good, won easily, I bought him a drink. Then he played some drunk woman and she got all upset saying he didn't call a combo shot he made and she freaked out and hit him in the face then kept trying to attack him with a pool cue while he refrained from hitting her and people get in the way and separated them. She got kicked out, then he did. He did some crazy ranting outside for a bit to vent, then when she got in a cab he slammed the door on her leg - bet that hurt. Irrelevant to my friend but just thought I'd share as it was rather.. entertaining ? lol

The funeral speeches for Boy were quite nice. Talking about how he united so many people in the area, artists, homeless people.. helped give people a real sense of family and community. I never even met him but that brought a tear to me eye. Also, there are paintings of his all around the tops of the wall at the bar - he worked there in some capacity - and people brought in their Boy art to hang on the wall for the night so there were a few dozen of his paintings on the wall. That was pretty cool.

I stuck around til 10ish with the faint hope that maybe I'd hear from my friend, but didn't expect it really and it didn't happen. All of the addicts I've consulted with have told me he's not reaching out due to shame, and one that's been especially helpful to me (Ninja) told me that even though my friend has told me about how he makes $ for his habit, me seeing him there on that block in the act of turning stolen merch into cash for drugs while anxiously seeking to get high would be a deeply shameful moment regardless of my knowledge of it all, lack of judgement/tolerance for it etc. He'd still be in a 'Oh s**t, I Haaaaate that you're seeing me like this Here doing this thing rn,' frame of mind. In MY reality my thoughts/feelings were 'This really sucks, I feel hurt that you don't even want to talk to me.' but chances are in HIS reality he was probably thinking 'omfg I feel so low being seen in this state by someone that cares about me, here, doing this thing.. I just want to disappear.' kind of thing. I told Ninja that the next time I get to see and talk to my friend, I want to relay to him that it's different but I get it.. I haven't seen my best friend or his kids/family since he fired me from working for his company (ASD symptoms crept up and I made mistakes that cost me the best job I ever had.) even though I love them all, I'm just deeply embarrassed over what happened. I think maybe sharing that true example will help him understand that I understand where he's at and why so much time has passed between communications.

I'm not going to call and leave another message for another week - maybe next Monday, Halloween. And on that note, my thought this morning is that I'm going to call the front desk of the youth shelter he's staying at and ask if it would be Okay to bring Halloween treats there -> for everyone. Like how many youth (under 25) are staying there? 100 ? Then I'll go to Costco and buy 100 chocolate bars and deliver them to the front desk, maybe with a note for him. He knows my character and knows that's a thing I'd generously do. And the more young homeless people I meet, the more I realize that such a simple inexpensive act of kindness can really truly make their entire day/week/holiday.. so many of these young people have fled horrific situations and don't have loving caring family and friends that'd make the effort to deliver Halloween treats to the shelter where they're staying, so, an act like that by a complete stranger would probably feel quite nice for some of them - maybe many/all I dunno. But if the front desk employee I next speak to says it'd be alright for me to deliver chocolate bars on/for Halloween, then I'm gonna 100%.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.