How do you “compensate”?

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Not saying ASD needs to be compensated for. It is a condition of some really significant strengths so I don’t downplay it and I strongly support neurodiversity. But there are some of us who struggle with the condition while some of us thrive with more minimal struggle. I don’t thrive. I am not a part of that group unfortunately.

For me, I can’t compensate with humor and wit. I simply don’t have it. When people aren’t naturally funny, they tend to just have a positive attitude and go with the flow of things and laugh at others’ jokes and such. I try to do that.

I guess I’m pretty wise for my age and get called an old soul sometimes. But most people my age don’t care that much about wisdom. So I tend to keep quiet when I have a wise thought.

I show a few talents to others and they get pretty dang impressed. That can be cool at times.

What do you guys do? NT’s sometimes view us as inferiors but that isn’t the whole truth. But when people see us at first glance, they see appearance. Then they see words. I’m not so good at the word part. I also can’t let myself be immature about anything or I’ll be “called out on”. Neurotypicals have the advantage of getting away with more, I think.

Been trying to focus on my “energy” a lot these days. Trying to make it positive as well as… healing? I meditate at times. Make the inner self shine through the outer self more if that makes sense? I’m told I have a very calm demeanor.

Maybe I won’t ever be “enough” to others but I’ll do what I can. For myself. Try to go halfway for others. Try to find a balance somehow. Isn’t that what we are all supposed to do as human beings? If I’m still not really accepted, that is okay. I can just make peace in my own downtime. To make all the other times easier.

I compensate with humor. It has been hit or miss for me. I mostly practice with strangers, a brief comment, get a smile or a laugh, and this sometimes leads in to a conversation. I did this yesterday with a couple but then didn't let go soon enough as they started edging away. Just still learning but I work at it when I want.

I'll sometimes have a social group with a planned night, game night or movie night or campfire. I'll mostly listen depending on the mood but have lead the conversations with practiced subjects...what is your zombie plan? ... where do you get your morals?...what is a lie?...depends on the mood and group but guide the conversation but not dominate it.

I like meditation and feel I can even do it with distractions, a mindfullness type. I'm not learned just my own self taught doings. I thought about getting an app but then think it would be a waste of money. I strive to just be at peace and to connect with my self. I've done it while waiting for a dr or dentist or when have auto serviced. I've never got into the lotus and meditated, is that you?

I feel I do more than go halfway as I have to work at it, kinda unfair but true. I strive to be honest with myself and then onto others. The other goal when with people is try to do the right thing for myself and then for others.

My boredom and curiosity is substituted for the lack of social drive and lack of need for socializing.

I don't compensate at socializing itself. It's the least of my worries and far from a priority.
I don't compensate to blend and pass.

Except anything to do involving verbal language.
Even nonsocial ones. I have low verbal aptitudes. I always compensate as I listen, read, speak and write with patterns and my other aptitudinal strengths.

It's a headache actually. And still feels unnatural for me.


Anyways.
I still do my best to avoid stress and sensory overload. I'd rather avoid burnout.
Most at the time, it can't be helped but.

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Edna reminds me about researching anxiety and excitement. Some research into repurposing the two emotions as they are implemented in our brain similarly. Sam Harris also has some discussions on it. I was going to look into it one of these days.

2014 study

I guess I compensate by not caring about what others think, and taking pride in being different. If you take away the caution and worry you're much more free to be yourself and be more comfortable. I do think it takes practice to socialize with various people. Like you know what not to say to your in-laws, who's emotionally sensitive, who you can joke with all the time ...etc. But the most important thing is to not worry if you made a mistake. I am the way I am. I try to be sensitive if I can but ultimately other people's feelings or opinions are not my responsibility.

Funny thing is I never have trouble finding friends. It's probably because I wasn't trying. OP you sound like a pretty awesome person. What others think shouldn't bother you. Maybe try to be friends with more mature people? I have friends who are seniors or disabled and they seem to have more patience. Young people are too busy with life to invest in non-sexual relationships. On the other hand I think young people nowadays have never learned to interact with real people. We're not so disadvantaged now.