What's the most stress-free living situation for someone...?

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TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB
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07 Apr 2022, 1:05 pm

What's the most stress-free living situation for someone with Aspergers?

*Living with parents

*Renting so all problems go to the landlord

*Other options?



Fnord
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07 Apr 2022, 1:24 pm

A vegetative state or coma.

A practical living situation for me would be just my wife and our cat(s) living in a safe, secure place somewhere in the country where our children could visit us whenever we feel like it.



lostonearth35
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07 Apr 2022, 1:37 pm

Being in your mother's womb. I used to have dreams when I was younger where I would be floating in a large bath or pool of warm water, and it was very dark, I was naked, and I felt very peaceful and relaxed, so I believe must have symbolized being in the womb. Seeing an episode of the Simpsons where Homer is dreaming he's a fetus in a womb confirmed my beliefs. Also like Homer, I did not enjoy waking up from the dream, even though I wasn't being quite literally torn out of it like he was.



The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Apr 2022, 2:24 pm

Living single, no kids, regardless where you live.

And oh, and a secure income.


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07 Apr 2022, 7:13 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
Being in your mother's womb. I used to have dreams when I was younger where I would be floating in a large bath or pool of warm water, and it was very dark, I was naked, and I felt very peaceful and relaxed, so I believe must have symbolized being in the womb. Seeing an episode of the Simpsons where Homer is dreaming he's a fetus in a womb confirmed my beliefs. Also like Homer, I did not enjoy waking up from the dream, even though I wasn't being quite literally torn out of it like he was.

Such a thing exists. Google "sensory deprivation chamber". Controversial comedian and podcast host Joe Rogan swears by it so do with that what you will :o



Texasmoneyman300
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07 Apr 2022, 10:57 pm

Well I am trying to start a Christian commune to get into a less stressful living arrangement



TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB
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08 Apr 2022, 10:24 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Living single, no kids, regardless where you live.

And oh, and a secure income.


@The_Face_of_Boo

Single is the best option?

Couldn't be with a partner & no kids with a secure income?



StillWaters
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09 Apr 2022, 8:37 am

Good question TB :) Since where I live rents are often extortionate, many people (me included) find themselves having to have roommates or living with parents even into their 30s. Unfortunately, what I have found is that I just can't do either. The main reason for this is that being social is a significant drain on my energy and I do not like having to deal with random strangers often at random times. Being rather particular about general cleanliness and noise levels further precludes this.

The one time I lived to together with a romantic partner was also a mess. Although this was largely due to the same reasons as mentioned above, the main one was that I just found myself getting extremely affected by my partners moods, which ultimately created a codependent toxic mess. While in theory I still like the idea of living with a partner, due to my strong sensitivities, I don't think it will ever happen. She would just have to be extremely like me.

So long story short: for me as someone with aspergers, living solo works best because it allows me to not be affected by other peoples' energies and living habits.



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12 Apr 2022, 3:05 am

Fnord wrote:
A vegetative state or coma.

A practical living situation for me would be just my wife and our cat(s) living in a safe, secure place somewhere in the country where our children could visit us whenever we feel like it.



Clever. Not quite living but not quite dead.

For me it would be 20 million in cash in the bank and being healthy.

Ironic considering I discovered yesterday that broke my foot two weeks ago and worried about holiday pay Vs sick pay now.

Turns out 55 hour weeks standing and walking in a workshop can actually cause your feet to break themselves with not a single bump.



ezbzbfcg2
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12 Apr 2022, 3:54 am

Having money, or winning it big in the lottery, and making decent return on interest in a savings account.

Never have to worry about being able to pay a utility bill ever again. Never have to worry about being able to pay for a major repair for the car or around the house. Never have to worry about being able to make rent (or mortgage / property tax payments). Never having to worry about working with hostile NTs.



nick007
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24 Apr 2022, 11:01 pm

TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB wrote:
What's the most stress-free living situation for someone with Aspergers?

*Living with parents

*Renting so all problems go to the landlord

*Other options?
I would guess that the most stress free living situation for someone with Aspergers would be living in a hollowdeck like Barclay wanted to do in Star Trek TNG. My 2nd guess would be living in some kinda virtual reality world while machines are hooked up to you to keep you alive like the Professor's parents on Futurama at the Near Death Star :nerdy:

Realistically thou, I think it would depend on the specific Aspie & what the exact circumstances & environment of their living options are. I personally am a lot better off mentally living with my girlfriend in an apartment than I was living with my parents. My parents live in a rural area & I cant drive & mom majorly resented me for being home all the time & not being alot more independent. We had a very volatile relationship with LOTS of fights that turned into me having bad meltdowns & mom threatening to kick me out into being homeless. Me & my girlfriend both have major problems being independent but we get by with the help of gov benefits to cover expenses & her family occasionally helps us out with things around our place. She's kinda unstable but she's also an empath & usually very sweet & loving so I find her aLOT easier & much more comfortable to deal with day to day than my parents were. I never really had any other living options available to me.


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28 Apr 2022, 5:44 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Living single, no kids, regardless where you live.

And oh, and a secure income.


All the above (which I have), plus a support network for when you need practical help (which I don't have anymore cause COVID killed them :cry: ).



kraftiekortie
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28 Apr 2022, 6:22 pm

I'm sorry that COVID killed many of your friends.



Where_am_I
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28 Apr 2022, 6:48 pm

Thanks, Kraftiekortie. I only had two friends in the city I moved to. The other handful live abroad.



Ettina
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30 Apr 2022, 8:47 am

TB_TB_TB_TB_TB_TB wrote:
What's the most stress-free living situation for someone with Aspergers?

*Living with parents

*Renting so all problems go to the landlord

*Other options?


It really depends on the people involved.

Living with parents can be very stressful or stress-free depending on how well you get along with your parents. Living with loving, supportive parents who respect and care about you is very low stress, living with abusive parents is very high stress, etc.

Renting from a good landlord can be low stress. Renting from a landlord who sets a lot of weird arbitrary restrictions or doesn't deal with serious problems promptly and effectively is very stressful. Also, if you're struggling financially, especially if your financial situation fluctuates unexpectedly, renting can be extremely stressful because of worries about paying the rent.

Homeownership can be low stress because once you have the home, you're much less likely to lose it if you run into financial difficulties. Also gives you a lot more personal control over your living situation, because you don't need to get permission from a landlord - as long as you follow your local bylaws, you can basically do whatever you want with your home. But on the con side, you don't have help dealing with problems that arise.

Owning a home with a homeowner's association is basically most of the cons of renting and the cons of homeownership, minus a lot of the benefits of either option. I don't recommend it for anyone, ever.



nick007
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30 Apr 2022, 11:42 am

A couple major factors I thought of are how independent the Aspie is(or wants to be) & if the Aspie wants a serious romantic relationship. If the Aspie has a very hard time dealing with independent living, owning their own home or renting their own place by themselves would probably be very stressful for them. But if the Aspie really likes having their independence & freedom to be left alone & do their own thing & can handle the responsibility of independent living, then owning or renting their own place might be much better options for them. If the Aspie really wants to have a romantic partner around a lot, sharing a place with their partner(or partner & kids) might be a lot better for them than living with parents or living alone would be.


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