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Kitty4670
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08 May 2022, 7:49 pm

If you were young & had more of a hard time understanding stuff & can have a behavior problem, how can someone hold you responsible for something that you had no control over, cuz you have Cerebral Pasly & Aspergers?


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klanka
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08 May 2022, 7:59 pm

Depends what the incident was, I got sternly told off for not having the capacity to know what I was doing wrong many times. I didn't understand vague instructions.



kraftiekortie
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08 May 2022, 8:52 pm

What didn’t you have control over?

When I was in 7th grade, I tore some kid’s ligaments because I was irritated that he chased around calling me “retard.” I didn’t realize it then—but I realize now that I was responsible for hurting this, even though he was teasing me, and I had autism.



doofy
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08 May 2022, 10:31 pm

Kitty4670 wrote:
how can someone hold you responsible for something that you had no control over


I always remember my mom RIP (thx) telling me to take "responsibility"



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09 May 2022, 1:51 am

That varies.

What pisses me off is the lack of input to work on. Lack of awareness and knowledge to get around with.
Because of lacking visibility and contexts when it comes to reading signs or reading between the lines.

That just seem like not having any control over things, and it's worse with mental health issues.

I prefer to be responsible and accountable.
But it doesn't consistently match my own reliability to uphold that.


Asking for help, expressing unmet needs, tons of patience and telling it all in a clear manner is itself a responsibility.

In fact, knowing when and how to ask for help is actually a self help skill for personal independence.


I understand why it's fricking frustrating.
There are many, many unspoken steps and prerequisites (I'm looking at executive functions) for being responsible and personally accountable.

That that 'concern tag' on one's back can be very infuriating to one's autonomy and self esteem.
That that impulse-like and involuntary-like sways gets in the way of reliability to self and others.


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09 May 2022, 1:55 am

Depends on what this responsibility entailed.



shortfatbalduglyman
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09 May 2022, 7:30 am

"can someone hold you responsible"?

"Can", in what sense?

Physically, legally, morally, or do they have permission?

"Can", "should", and "will" are three different things

"Someone" is who:. Employer, law enforcement, friends, enemies, acquaintances, strangers?

"Responsible" in what way?

Not all verdicts are factually correct

Anyone could "tell off" anyone for any reason. It doesn't have to be justified

Sometimes, someone doesn't believe that you have no control over it

Sometimes they don't care

But, yes, someone could hold you responsible for something out of your control

Sometimes defendants get framed up and sent to jail

There is nothing impossible about it

Sometimes employees get made redundant for something that is not their fault

The company could do anything it wants, legal or illegal. Unless you win a civil lawsuit, you can't do anything about it

If you are just talking about schoolteachers, parents, and et cetera, then of course.

Numerous lil dipshits have had the nerve to bark at me for my wrongful facial expressions


Your question is too ambiguous



Kitty4670
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09 May 2022, 6:33 pm

Is it true that when people are young & have Autism, they cannot understand alot of things, they can be little violent, hurt themselves, cannot control their anger or act bad. I’m just asking.


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doofy
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09 May 2022, 6:46 pm

Kitty4670 wrote:
Is it true that when people are young & have Autism, they cannot understand alot of things, they can be little violent, hurt themselves, cannot control their anger or act bad. I’m just asking.


Sure
But, lets be honest, that can apply to NT kids also

I'd say it kinda depends where your cutoff point is for "young"



shortfatbalduglyman
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09 May 2022, 8:50 pm

doofy wrote:
Kitty4670 wrote:
Is it true that when people are young & have Autism, they cannot understand alot of things, they can be little violent, hurt themselves, cannot control their anger or act bad. I’m just asking.


Sure
But, lets be honest, that can apply to NT kids also

I'd say it kinda depends where your cutoff point is for "young"


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auntblabby
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09 May 2022, 9:30 pm

in summary, hell is other people. some of us learn it a lot sooner than others.



Kitty4670
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10 May 2022, 12:12 am

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
doofy wrote:
Kitty4670 wrote:
Is it true that when people are young & have Autism, they cannot understand alot of things, they can be little violent, hurt themselves, cannot control their anger or act bad. I’m just asking.


Sure
But, lets be honest, that can apply to NT kids also

I'd say it kinda depends where your cutoff point is for "young"


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Nobody understands everything. Young or old. Autistic or neurotypicals

It is not functionally necessary to understand everything

Violent and angry people represent a wide variety of ages and diagnoses

Nobody is perfect

There is no such thing as perfection


My sister think she knows everything about me. Last time we texted, she was nasty to me, saying really worse things to me, she also said complete strangers really don’t know the real me. Why is she doing this to me? My mom was right, my sister never wanted a handicap sister, there were alot of times when she was jealous of me, saying our parents spent more time with me, it wasn’t my fault that I have Cerebral Pasly & Psoriasis, when I was very young, my Psoriasis was sooo worse. I did not want to change for P.E. & in high school, I put my gym clothes over my regular clothes, my legs were covered in Psoriasis. I got them when I was 6 years old, my Psoriasis wasn’t too bad, my parents believed the doctor saying my Psoriasis will go away if they put me in a sunlight booth, my dad built me one, my Psoriasis got sooo worse. Since my mom made a trust fund for me, my sister & my nephew, my mom put my sister in charge of the trust, she is tooo controlling, demanding, sooo stubborn, she been the worse to me for 10 years now, she think I’m the worse. What happened to her!? I wish I can make my own money. She can be so scary & ugly. She sooo worse for my health. My sister became my enemy. With what she said was soooo unreal.


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klanka
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10 May 2022, 12:38 am

Its pretty bad