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Mentioning ASD Around Family Is Weird

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Caz72
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17 May 2022, 4:03 pm

I get what you mean

many people dont believe i am autistic because i drive buses and they think autistic people are unable to have a career like that

im moderate autistic wich means im high functioning but can be obviously autistic like being in my own world,visible meltdowns even in public,specified interests ( mine is my job (things like that .

obviously i have to mask a lot at work and i have had meltdowns at work but fortunately my boss knows i have autism and fully understands my needs so he puts me on the same bus route every day so that the feeling of sameness/routine makes me more able to handle things


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HeroOfHyrule
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17 May 2022, 5:21 pm

Caz72 wrote:
I get what you mean

many people dont believe i am autistic because i drive buses and they think autistic people are unable to have a career like that

im moderate autistic wich means im high functioning but can be obviously autistic like being in my own world,visible meltdowns even in public,specified interests ( mine is my job (things like that .

obviously i have to mask a lot at work and i have had meltdowns at work but fortunately my boss knows i have autism and fully understands my needs so he puts me on the same bus route every day so that the feeling of sameness/routine makes me more able to handle things

I think my autism is more moderate, too. I'm not as high functioning as my brother or my dad, and I can't mask that well as an adult. Adulthood is, unfortunately, way too demanding and confusing for me to function "properly" and thrive.



Dillogic
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17 May 2022, 8:42 pm

Not that I see any family, but I have no problems with mentioning Autism, as most people know all about it, even if in a stereotypical way (they'll at least have their reason for why I'm quiet, as many think the worst of quiet people). I don't mention it unless asked, as I'd rather be seen by personality than disorder, and I'd be of the quiet personality too with speak when spoken to.

A neighbor knows, among other things, but doesn't bring any of it up, which I like.



kitesandtrainsandcats
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17 May 2022, 9:07 pm

HeroOfHyrule wrote:
it's just frustrating when he gets angry at me for autistic traits I have and tries to pretend I'm completely normal.


I wonder if a factor in it could be that not exactly rare neurotypical twisted absurdity of logic where if you aren't NT then it means he is a failure.


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JDintheQuietCorner
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17 May 2022, 11:26 pm

Hmm. When I have a therapist appointment (it’s only been by phone and just recently on Zoom), she literally can’t talk to me unless I’m alone & in a private place.



HeroOfHyrule
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17 May 2022, 11:41 pm

JDintheQuietCorner wrote:
Hmm. When I have a therapist appointment (it’s only been by phone and just recently on Zoom), she literally can’t talk to me unless I’m alone & in a private place.

She asked me if I was in a safe place and all that, but I didn't really have any other choice because that is the only time she has an opening for a session with me (Monday at 3:30) and my aunt had another appointment that we went to right before that. Usually we're home by then and I am in a room by myself during my session.



HeroOfHyrule
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17 May 2022, 11:43 pm

kitesandtrainsandcats wrote:
I wonder if a factor in it could be that not exactly rare neurotypical twisted absurdity of logic where if you aren't NT then it means he is a failure.

That probably contributes to it. He definitely seems to think that if I'm "flat out autistic" that it reflects badly on him.



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18 May 2022, 1:28 pm

You're an adult. I think the solution is to carve out an adult life for yourself with adult friends who like and understand and respect you. Then the opinions of family become annoyances you have to put up with during holidays, not everyday occurrences.