Who gets insulted, verbally abused, mocked and ridiculed?

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Shadweller
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05 Jun 2022, 1:23 pm

Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?



temp1234
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05 Jun 2022, 2:41 pm

I was in exactly the same situation for many years.

I got laughed at, bitched about behind my back, excluded from work email lists so that I couldn't do my work, etc...

The whole work environment was toxic. Even in normal situations it was difficult for me to talk with people due to anxiety/nervousness, let alone when I knew people were being nasty.

I dealt with it by recording the details of all instances of people being malicious with date and time, however small, documenting them properly, and then lodging a written complaint to the HR when there was an escalated instance. I implied that I was prepared to contact an outside organization (government department) that deals with unfair treatment of employees if the issue was not taken seriously. It worked. Now those that got in trouble are too scared to harass me. They got shamed and it's in their employee records. They still hate me but don't bother me.

Fortunately, I transferred to a different department within the same company where people are civilized and respectful.

Edit: added a missing word



Jayo
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05 Jun 2022, 2:53 pm

I suppose you could always do what they call "turning the tables".
Their inappropriate laughter and mockery are over a perceived mental illness - yours.
You could confront them with "what are you laughing at?" - if they respond "oh - nothing", as they are likely to do, then you could follow up with "Well, then you must be clinically insane, because only bipolar people and crazies (or the Joker) laugh at nothing!!"



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05 Jun 2022, 2:55 pm

Good for you - by standing up for yourself you're actually educating society that not everyone can be the same and that laughing at someone is not appropriate and can hurt their feelings. You'd think NTs would know this already but sadly most don't (some do, thank God).


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Jayo
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05 Jun 2022, 2:56 pm

temp1234 wrote:
I was in exactly the same situation for many years.

I got laughed at, bitched about behind my back, excluded from work email lists so that I couldn't do my work, etc...

The whole work environment was toxic. Even in normal situations it was difficult for me to talk with people due to anxiety/nervousness, let alone when I knew people were being nasty.

I dealt with it by recording the details of all instances of people being malicious with date and time, however small, documenting them properly, and then lodging a written complaint to the HR when there was an escalated instance. I implied that I was prepared to contact an outside organization (government department) that deals with unfair treatment of employees if the issue was not taken seriously. It worked. Now those that got in trouble are too scared to harass me. They got shamed and it's in their employee records. They still hate me but don't bother me.

Fortunately, I transferred to a different department within the same company where people are civilized and respectful.

Edit: added a missing word


Yeah, that's good that you did that, I had to do that myself with a former bully boss who was eventually let go.
It can be tough for us to surmount this sort of mass bullying of the passive-aggressive kind, because each member of the clique will cover for the other, and use "plausible deniability". They may also unfairly invoke your "mental illness" as a lack of credibility, because you misinterpreted or hallucinated the behaviour :evil: :x
This is why you have to have thorough documentation of the incidents.



Jayo
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05 Jun 2022, 3:01 pm

Shadweller wrote:
Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?


I might also add that a big problem with this kind of inappropriate reaction by NTs is that they don't give you any factual feedback to work with, so that you might avoid this in future.
Like if you confront them and they say "we're laughing because you're weird, there's something strange about you" OK, well, that doesn't exactly narrow it down does it???
If they said "we're laughing because we noticed that you keeping moving your head around in strange ways, mutter to yourself, and tap two fingers on the table repeatedly" then you'd at least have something to work with...



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05 Jun 2022, 7:00 pm

Quote:
Who gets insulted, verbally abused, mocked and ridiculed?


Who doesn't, when they are on the spectrum? :scratch:



cubedemon6073
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05 Jun 2022, 8:46 pm

Shadweller wrote:
Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?


Okay!

You said something and now what? What did it accomplish? Did you change any of these people's minds on anything? Did it get them to respect you anymore then they do? Or, are they still continuing to talk behind your back? Did they get any kind of insight from you?

The truth is you saying something accomplished absolutely nothing. It changed nothing. It didn't make anyone feel guilty or think about anything.

So with that being said...

Let them talk about you. Does it matter what they really said in the long grand scheme of things? Why?

Will they even remember you after a week or two? I bet they won't and they will continue to do what they always done before they met you.

In the end, who in the f**k cares what they think. They don't give a damn what you think. YOU DO YOU! LET THEM DO THEM! f**k them to hell and back!

This is what I said to my SO when a couple of dudes called her a bed wench for some BS reason (I didn't even know wtf it even meant at the time) when "I didn't defend her" and she wanted to say something to them.

Why? What's the f*****g point? It accomplishes nothing. It changes nothing. It sure as s**t didn't change their mind. So, I'm telling you what I told her. Who cares what they think. f**k them to hell and back!

If you must say something and I personally see all these haters as beneath my notice (so I really don't care) then tell them to eat a dick and keep it moving. That's it! It's that simple! Tell them to eat a dick if you really feel you should say something back which I think it is a waste of your time and energy.

I do think you should work on things that you have control over like your anger especially internalizing.

I did and sometimes do have the bad habit of internalizing anger. I know it is easier said then done and I do still hang on to grudges and I'm still working on things but the truth is we got to let it go.

If you can do that then you shall be at the first step at mastering the force. :D

But the truth is anger is like a slow acting poison that kills you slowly in more ways then one.



Last edited by cubedemon6073 on 05 Jun 2022, 9:00 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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05 Jun 2022, 8:57 pm

Yeah

It's almost always due to my lack of social interaction. I'm asocial and only really speak when spoken to, and unless I know someone, I'll only give a short and direct answer. I guess this leads to people assuming the worst of me, so enter eventual bullying and I eventually leave. Kinda not an issue in the end comparatively speaking, other than having to be around groups of people for an extended period of time a bother; it made schooling and any attempts at working disabling in many ways.

The hyenas are quite adapt at noticing those who're different.

I just ignore it.

That's just life, though.



cubedemon6073
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05 Jun 2022, 10:22 pm

Or, another solution.

You can fill a super soaker filled with urine and shoot at them. :D :D

Seriously, please don't do this. You will go to prison for aggravated assault.

I'm just joking!!



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06 Jun 2022, 2:17 am

cubedemon6073 wrote:
Shadweller wrote:
Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?


Okay!

You said something and now what? What did it accomplish? Did you change any of these people's minds on anything? Did it get them to respect you anymore then they do? Or, are they still continuing to talk behind your back? Did they get any kind of insight from you?

The truth is you saying something accomplished absolutely nothing. It changed nothing. It didn't make anyone feel guilty or think about anything.

So with that being said...

Let them talk about you. Does it matter what they really said in the long grand scheme of things? Why?

Will they even remember you after a week or two? I bet they won't and they will continue to do what they always done before they met you.

In the end, who in the f**k cares what they think. They don't give a damn what you think. YOU DO YOU! LET THEM DO THEM! f**k them to hell and back!

This is what I said to my SO when a couple of dudes called her a bed wench for some BS reason (I didn't even know wtf it even meant at the time) when "I didn't defend her" and she wanted to say something to them.

Why? What's the f*****g point? It accomplishes nothing. It changes nothing. It sure as s**t didn't change their mind. So, I'm telling you what I told her. Who cares what they think. f**k them to hell and back!

If you must say something and I personally see all these haters as beneath my notice (so I really don't care) then tell them to eat a dick and keep it moving. That's it! It's that simple! Tell them to eat a dick if you really feel you should say something back which I think it is a waste of your time and energy.

I do think you should work on things that you have control over like your anger especially internalizing.

I did and sometimes do have the bad habit of internalizing anger. I know it is easier said then done and I do still hang on to grudges and I'm still working on things but the truth is we got to let it go.

If you can do that then you shall be at the first step at mastering the force. :D

But the truth is anger is like a slow acting poison that kills you slowly in more ways then one.



It allowed him to vent. It served an important purpose in that sense and is a stepping stone for starting genuinely unpleasant retorts back to such people.

I wish I could have called people a bunch of fat ass losers more often on the past but never plucked up the courage.



Texasmoneyman300
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06 Jun 2022, 3:05 am

Shadweller wrote:
Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?

Ya my dad trolls me every day.He says he's just joking but he tries to get a rise out of me every day and pretty much all the time I am with him and sometimes he mocks me and says I am weird as a joke but I dont take it that.He says I am so weird but I know he is joking but it still so very hurtful.He exasperates me every day on purpose.He is a big bully a lot of the time and there is nothing I can do about it even though he think he is being funny and is good natured ribbing he thinks.But Ya it stinks.He also yells at me a lot.He also insults me a lot.My dad tries to make me mad every day.But I take it as if he was a big schoolyard bully at recess every day and every night 24/7 when he exasperates me.



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06 Jun 2022, 4:27 am

Texasmoneyman300 wrote:
Shadweller wrote:
Due to their social deficits and all manner of lack of social skills caused by their Autism?

It always happens to me when I am pushed into a situation beyond my limits to cope with, and people just love an easy target that they can put the metaphorical verbal boot into.

I caught one couple exchanging glances over me and laughing to each other yesterday, I was finally able to speak up for myself to a certain extent, and although what i said wasn't ideal, it was a start, and better than having to sit and stew for hours as a result of having been insulted and not defended myself.

I said "what are you laughing at!!? I would like to know what you are laughing at! Laughing at someone because they are Autistic is not very funny!" One of the women was clearly embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. Good! And so she should be. That was exactly what I was hoping for. How dare they pick on such an easy target, thinking that they have a defenceless vulnerable easy lone target. The other woman looked at me as if I had made some kind of clever joke or something. I couldn't figure that out. But I will know what to say next time. "What are you looking like that for!? I'm not Joking!"

I refuse to be treated this way any more and not say anything. Last time it happened a few weeks ago I was so tense and upset that I developed a stomach ache and felt quite ill for the rest of the day. It ruins my day when people laugh at me due to my social deficits. Rather than hopelessly get angry and upset I am going to plan what I can say to these ****** next time this happens. Oh and it will. Whenever I push myself into new situations outside my comfort zone this happens.

I am not a violent person, I dont want to get into fights, but if i can cause these horrible mean people to feel embarrased and ashamed of themselves for being so mean then my work is done. It will be on them to carry the shame and anger and not on me. God I hate these people. BUt no more getting upset and angry in a futile way. Instead I will plan what I should have said to these horrible people. Then when something similar happens again I will have something to say. This is not about launching at someone in an uncontrolled furious tirade, it is about being controlled, being in control, and turning the tables on the nasty pieces of work who think it is acceptable to laugh at an easy target when that person is an Autistic person outside of their comfort zone, on their own, and they are in a group and the balance of power is clearly off.

Part of my deficits are that I cant usually think of things to say off the cuff on the spur of the moment in unusual or novel circumstances. Still there are certain commonalities in all of these events. Anger should be used to advantage. Not left to fester where it can wreak havoc on a persons body and mind and quite literally make them ill.

Does anyone else go through anything similar? How do you deal with it?

Ya my dad trolls me every day.He says he's just joking but he tries to get a rise out of me every day and pretty much all the time I am with him and sometimes he mocks me and says I am weird as a joke but I dont take it that.He says I am so weird but I know he is joking but it still so very hurtful.He exasperates me every day on purpose.He is a big bully a lot of the time and there is nothing I can do about it even though he think he is being funny and is good natured ribbing he thinks.But Ya it stinks.He also yells at me a lot.He also insults me a lot.My dad tries to make me mad every day.But I take it as if he was a big schoolyard bully at recess every day and every night 24/7 when he exasperates me.


Gosh. When the two of you are in front of others, and your dad says something...you should jump in and say with a smile "we have to tolerate dad here ...saying dumb stuff like that...because he is senile. You just have to bear with him." And when he gets livid just say "cant ya take a joke?". :lol:



Shadweller
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06 Jun 2022, 12:47 pm

cubedemon6073 wrote:

Okay!

You said something and now what? What did it accomplish? Did you change any of these people's minds on anything? Did it get them to respect you anymore then they do? Or, are they still continuing to talk behind your back? Did they get any kind of insight from you?

The truth is you saying something accomplished absolutely nothing. It changed nothing. It didn't make anyone feel guilty or think about anything.

So with that being said...

Let them talk about you. Does it matter what they really said in the long grand scheme of things? Why?

Will they even remember you after a week or two? I bet they won't and they will continue to do what they always done before they met you.

In the end, who in the f**k cares what they think. They don't give a damn what you think. YOU DO YOU! LET THEM DO THEM! f**k them to hell and back!

This is what I said to my SO when a couple of dudes called her a bed wench for some BS reason (I didn't even know wtf it even meant at the time) when "I didn't defend her" and she wanted to say something to them.

Why? What's the f*****g point? It accomplishes nothing. It changes nothing. It sure as s**t didn't change their mind. So, I'm telling you what I told her. Who cares what they think. f**k them to hell and back!

If you must say something and I personally see all these haters as beneath my notice (so I really don't care) then tell them to eat a dick and keep it moving. That's it! It's that simple! Tell them to eat a dick if you really feel you should say something back which I think it is a waste of your time and energy.

I do think you should work on things that you have control over like your anger especially internalizing.

I did and sometimes do have the bad habit of internalizing anger. I know it is easier said then done and I do still hang on to grudges and I'm still working on things but the truth is we got to let it go.

If you can do that then you shall be at the first step at mastering the force. :D

But the truth is anger is like a slow acting poison that kills you slowly in more ways then one.


Yes I agree that I should work on my ease of provocation. At the same time I am not on this earth to be a doormat for people to walk all over as they see fit. It's a balancing act. For me, pretending to ignore it and act as if i dont care has never worked.This is what my parents told me to do, but it does not work for me. It leaves me seething with resentment for hours, days, months, or years. When I do say something i immediately feel glad and better. It is a mark of self respect to not take s**t from any rude and ignorant twat. Nor should I. This tells me something I have to trust my own inner guide on this. I think this is what will work for me. My Dad takes no s**t from anybody, he has an incredible knack of turning any insult right back at anyone who has attempted to slight him, and make them feel like the small piece of s**t that they truly are for trying to get something over on someone who is autistic and deaf as in the case of my father. I agree there is nothing to be gained by losing it and making a fool of oneself. The thing is that I am not quick witted in such situations so I will either need to prepare ready responses for common scenarios that have cropped up and may crop up again. I resent being treated as someone fool that hey think they can get one over on me to boost their fragile ego by feeling socially superior to an Autistic person. Such people really are lowly pieces of s**t.



Joe90
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06 Jun 2022, 1:06 pm

Quote:
At the same time I am not on this earth to be a doormat for people to walk all over as they see fit. It's a balancing act. For me, pretending to ignore it and act as if i dont care has never worked.This is what my parents told me to do, but it does not work for me. It leaves me seething with resentment for hours, days, months, or years. When I do say something i immediately feel glad and better. It is a mark of self respect to not take s**t from any rude and ignorant twat. Nor should I.


That. Is. Exactly. EXACTLY. How I feel, only you've worded it better.
Ignoring = putting up with it/tolerating it.

The cliche is that bullies or whatever they are only want a reaction, but this is not always the case. Some bullies seem surprised when they get a reaction. If bullies (a.k.a people who don't care about your feelings) think they can get away with belittling someone then they will. And by ignoring them, you are letting them get away with it.

And I believe in the adult world bullies actually don't do the things they do for a reaction. They do these things because they feel like it and don't understand how it's making you feel.

I spent all my high school life ignoring bullies, but it never made them go away. In fact the more I ignored them the worse they got. Then others saw that I was too weak to stand up for myself, and they joined in, thinking it was a game. They were having a great time humiliating me. And really, I just looked the idiot for walking along with my nose in the air ignoring them because it meant I was just letting them have their fun.

Ironic word of advice: ignore those who tell you to ignore.


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06 Jun 2022, 1:29 pm

Pepe wrote:
Quote:
Who gets insulted, verbally abused, mocked and ridiculed?


Who doesn't, when they are on the spectrum? :scratch:


And are we supposed to just accept this like some kind of human verbal punch bag. It is literally making me ill by not standing up for myself.

It seriously has the potential to send me to an early grave.