Why is it easier to be single?

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Why is it easier to be single?

You're asking a question based on an opinion,as if it's fact.

It's easier for me to be single because I don't have to take anyone else into consideration when living my life. I don't have to run my plans by anyone else and I can do what I want, when I want. I can make financial decisions without stressing anyone else's spending habits. I can cook what I want, clean when I want, be alone when I want, vanish in the woods when I want...I have freedom.

I'm a person who requires a huge amount of alone time in order to be okay. Being single, I'm not making anyone mad or hurting anyone's feelings when I 'hide'. I'm also not a very emotional person, so I'm not hurting anyone by making them feel alone when they are sitting next to me or when I fail to show affection in ways that resonate with them. I find liking people to be incredibly uncomfortable to me as well, so I don't have to feel any discomfort in that way. Less stressful when I'm single.

I don't like dealing with other people's problems as I find they generally bring these problems onto themselves. That frustrates me. I don't like other people's work issues, facebook fights, friend drama or whatever... People can often seem to feed these things rather than try to solve them, and if it's a partner, those issues become my issues unless I ignore them and become the jerk. I hate that crap. Less problems in life when I'm single.

I don't feel lonely. I think that's important. It seems to me most people I've run into want a relationship because they want to alleviate loneliness or have sex. I have family and friends who eat up a decent amount of my time and I have nothing left for a partner time/energy wise. I prefer to spend my spare time alone, with my dog. I have a fwb as well, so I feel no need for a relationship in order to have sex. Adding someone else to my life would exhaust me. The people I have now exhaust me regularly as it is. I have nothing left for anyone else at this point in my life. It would be kinda crappy of me to even try to be in a relationship right now. I cannot be a decent partner to someone else if I have nothing left for that person. For me, it's not only easier, it's also nicer to others if I stay single.

Standard disclaimer... the above is my opinion. I'm only saying why I think it's easier for me to be single.

You only have to account for yourself and your family-----not a spouse and his/her family, too.

• Your decisions are your own: You never have to compromise with someone whose decisions conflict with your own.

• Your living-space is your own: The furniture stays where you left it, and no one can move in without your permission.

• Your money is your own: You know exactly how much you have to spend on bills, how much to save, and how much is left to have some fun.

• Your property is your own: When you set your keys down, they will still be in the same place when you need them again -- no one messes with your 'stuff'.

• Your secrets remain secret: There is no one to 'accidentally' inform the world about your favorite ways to make yourself happy.

• Your time is your own: What are you going to do this weekend?  Whatever the hell you want!

I've decided that I'm going to live the single life, because I won't have to change for anyone. I don't have to squeeze myself into a little box. I don't have to give up on my favourite things.

• The only annoying friends you must deal with are your own.
• The only debts you must pay off are your own.
• The only disasters you must fix are your own.
• The only fetishes you must deal with are your own.
• The only insecurities you must deal with are your own.
• The only messes you must clean up are your own.
• The only mood swings you must deal with are your own.
• The only person spending your money is you.
• The only person who goes through your stuff is you.
• The only person who sees your inbox is you.
• The only person whining about not being fed is your cat.
• The only person whining about not not going out is your dog.
• The only person who moves the toilet seat is you.

• There's only one way to do things: your way.

• You do not have to answer to anyone.
• You do not have to apologize for normal human behavior.
• You do not have to change your life simply someone else has jealousy issues.
• You do not have to change your religious beliefs one bit.
• You do not have to deal with "compliment fishing".
• You do not have to deal with someone else's relatives all the time.
• You do not have to hide gifts, receipts, and other purchase records.
• You do not have to hide your stash of comfort food (i.e., chocolate, et cetera).
• You do not have to live with someone who can't stand your parents.
• You do not have to make excuses.
• You do not have to put on an act 24/7 just to keep the peace.
• You do not have to share.

.

This reason in particular, plus everything else Fnord mentioned.

Although my boyfriend's drinking problem causes stress and grief for me, I still wouldn't want to give all that up and be single again. I suffered severe mental health problems when I was single, and the mental health problems seemed to go away as soon as I got into a serious relationship with my boyfriend. Of course I have my moments still, but not as bad as before. And yes I get panicky and tearful and sometimes even frightened when he's too drunk, but thankfully it's not every day.

In the UK it is hard to find a partner that doesn't drink, even though some drink more than others of course but unless they're religious or have underlying health issues that alcohol can make life-threatening, people that choose to be teetotal like me are extremely rare in the UK and finding one would be like looking for a needle in a haystack. So even if I did leave him just because he gets drunk sometimes, the next man I meet will probably like his drink too and might even be worse than my boyfriend when drunk.

So that's my attitude anyway. I don't envy single people but I do respect them of course.

^

That's interesting, I can imagine that being true, as in not just your imagination.


I've only had bad relationships, so fnord's list rings true with me. I can't help but imagine what a good relationship would be like, it could just be a fantasy.

If you are single and have pets it might alter the equation a bit on those.

And ...

Pets can even change that one too ...
(note: some folks will not consider a pet to be a "person" but some days with some pets you really do wonder ...)




If nothing else has ever demonstrated that, yes, there are valid, documentable, truths on the internet ...

^ Why I don't have any pets!

I need a lot of alone time...that means pets need to GTFO too.

Yes, the distinctions must be made between being single, living single, and living single with pets.

This presupposes that being in a relationship entails all of these things. You can be in a relationship to someone without marrying them and/or living with them.

That is the state of being "Single" (as opposed to being "Married").  You can be single and have any number of relationships; but once you are married, even if you live separately, you are no longer single (and likely have few, if any, other relationships).

It's easier for me to be single because it is extremely difficult for me to get in romantic relationships. VERY few people are willing to give me half a chance. However 1ce I am in a romantic relationship, I find it aLOT more comfortable, relaxing, & easier to deal with & maitain than being single.