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KitLily
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30 Jun 2022, 6:04 am

I am very excited about this but very nervous. Because it entails:

1. Making sure I get everything right i.e. doing her hair neatly (I'm not a girlie girl at all, I have no idea about fashion); ensuring she has everything she needs- bag, shoes, tissues, money etc. Otherwise she may not enjoy the prom.

2. Getting out of the car with her and talking to teachers and other parents. I'm nervous doing that anyway but I haven't talked to strangers for 2+ years due to the pandemic, so I'm extra nervous.

3. Fetching her from the prom late at night. My husband will be driving but it will still be 'going out at night' which I rarely do now, I rarely leave the house anymore.

So I'm anxious today but hoping I don't have a meltdown and spoil her day. Wish me luck.


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lostonearth35
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30 Jun 2022, 12:29 pm

I never went to the prom when I was young. I remember once going to a dance in junior high one time but leaving early because it was boring and sensory overloading. So much pressure put on young people at proms, especially girls. They think it's going to be some kind of fairy tale, like Cinderella at the Ball. Welp, there's a reason why it's called a fairy tale: it's not real.



Fnord
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30 Jun 2022, 12:32 pm

@KitLily: Just curious, but why are you (instead of a boy) taking your daughter to her prom?

(I am assuming that she is in high school.)



KitLily
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30 Jun 2022, 12:46 pm

lostonearth35 wrote:
I never went to the prom when I was young. I remember once going to a dance in junior high one time but leaving early because it was boring and sensory overloading. So much pressure put on young people at proms, especially girls. They think it's going to be some kind of fairy tale, like Cinderella at the Ball. Welp, there's a reason why it's called a fairy tale: it's not real.


Yes, we didn't have proms when I was at school. I'd probably have been nervous, I don't know. School was a long time ago (the 1980s). We just kind of said 'bye then' to everyone. A big anticlimax. Now they mark the occasion nicely.

She was nervous but she loves dressing up. We drove up to the red carpet and she got out and had her photo taken. I didn't even have to get out and speak to anyone! She knew the people greeting her and went off with them confidently. She is so brave.

And we managed to do the hair, make up, dress etc. just right. Gosh I was relieved about that. I was terrified of making a mistake.

I think it went well and hopefully she will have a lovely time with her friends :heart:


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Last edited by KitLily on 30 Jun 2022, 12:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

KitLily
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30 Jun 2022, 12:48 pm

Fnord wrote:
@KitLily: Just curious, but why are you (instead of a boy) taking your daughter to her prom?

(I am assuming that she is in high school.)


A boy? Why would a boy take her? The students are taken by their parents, or they go as a group of friends in a limo. She is at secondary school, well, just finished last week. She is 16. She is meeting her friends there, they all agreed to meet up.


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Fnord
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30 Jun 2022, 12:49 pm

KitLily wrote:
Fnord wrote:
@KitLily: Just curious, but why are you (instead of a boy) taking your daughter to her prom?  (I am assuming that she is in high school.)
A boy? Why would a boy take her? The students are taken by their parents, or they go as a group of friends in a limo. She is at secondary school, well, just finished last week. She is 16. She is meeting her friends there, they all agreed to meet up.
Oh, sorry . . . I just now noticed you are in England.  Obviously, you do things differently there.



KitLily
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30 Jun 2022, 1:01 pm

Fnord wrote:
Oh, sorry . . . I just now noticed you are in England.  Obviously, you do things differently there.


Oh I see! haha. You must be American. Yes, as far as I know it's always been groups of friends going to proms together in England.

I think it's far too much pressure for boys to ask a girl to the prom and girls to wait to be asked. Anyway, maybe the boy wants to go with a boy and the girl with a girl?


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Fnord
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30 Jun 2022, 1:09 pm

KitLily wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Oh, sorry . . . I just now noticed you are in England.  Obviously, you do things differently there.
Oh I see! haha. You must be American. Yes, as far as I know it's always been groups of friends going to proms together in England.  I think it's far too much pressure for boys to ask a girl to the prom and girls to wait to be asked.  Anyway, maybe the boy wants to go with a boy and the girl with a girl?
Yes, I grew up in America, and during a time when the only couples included 1 boy and 1 girl (this is slowly changing).  Kids without a prom date went alone or with a few friends in the hope that they might pair up with someone else there.



KitLily
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30 Jun 2022, 1:13 pm

Fnord wrote:
Yes, I grew up in America, and during a time when the only couples included 1 boy and 1 girl (this is slowly changing).  Kids without a prom date went alone or with a few friends in the hope that they might pair up with someone else there.


I suppose fashions change don't they. It is a bit pressurised saying you must go with a date. I hope it changes in America to just be a group of friends. I bet when I was at school (in the 1980s) if we'd had Proms I wouldn't have got asked by a boy and I'd have felt even more weird and excluded :(


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Fnord
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30 Jun 2022, 1:16 pm

KitLily wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Yes, I grew up in America, and during a time when the only couples included 1 boy and 1 girl (this is slowly changing).  Kids without a prom date went alone or with a few friends in the hope that they might pair up with someone else there.
I suppose fashions change don't they. It is a bit pressurised saying you must go with a date. I hope it changes in America to just be a group of friends. I bet when I was at school (in the 1980s) if we'd had Proms I wouldn't have got asked by a boy and I'd have felt even more weird and excluded.
Similar to the way a boy feels being rejected for a prom date by every girl he asks.  I never went to the prom.



KitLily
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01 Jul 2022, 3:40 am

Fnord wrote:
KitLily wrote:
I suppose fashions change don't they. It is a bit pressurised saying you must go with a date. I hope it changes in America to just be a group of friends. I bet when I was at school (in the 1980s) if we'd had Proms I wouldn't have got asked by a boy and I'd have felt even more weird and excluded.
Similar to the way a boy feels being rejected for a prom date by every girl he asks.  I never went to the prom.


Yes, it's stupid to put all that pressure on kids. Much better to go in a group of friends isn't it.


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