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Aet1985
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04 Jul 2022, 3:22 pm

This has been getting me upset and bothering me lately, why do us Aspies have issues socially or with groups? I know I can be a little eccentric or ''odd'' but I am myself such as holding onto my thoughts, worldview and at times ''arrogant'' behavior, it seems when I don't fit the ''format'' I am ''written out of the show'' so to



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04 Jul 2022, 3:43 pm

My understanding is NTs are uncomfortable around people who are not like them.

Being not like them is immediately considered to be a defect.


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Aet1985
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04 Jul 2022, 3:52 pm

That is what annoys me I am far from perfect but I consider myself intelligent such as with difference subjects space study, history, science and so on, I consider myself a very deep thinker and can think in vivid ''HD'' pictures, I am very down to earth but find myself questioning humanity and where we are going, or can be ''critical'' and scathing of society norms and thought, even though I am a nice person despite preferring my own thoughts and imagination, very rarely am I giving a chance, then many NTs wonder what is wrong or why does he get angry and emotional?



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04 Jul 2022, 5:30 pm

I find humor helpful.

Subtle, dry, wry humor.

If you can get someone to chuckle they often seem to be more tolerant of you.


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04 Jul 2022, 9:30 pm

Aet1985 wrote:
... why do us Aspies have issues socially or with groups?


Likely some "pathological" changes to areas of the brain involved in social and emotional interaction during very early development, which will be exacerbated by the same causing difficulties when trying to compensate via early learned behaviors from others. "Damaged" nature leading to difficulties in responding to nurture in other words. Just the latter on its own can make someone appear autistic or develop something that looks like it. Those with autism have a double hit, hence why deficits in social and emotional skills are often the most marked symptoms. I'm sure there's many a paper on this out there, many a theory.

It won't be as evident in typing or writing all that much, and that's where learned behaviors later on in life enter, where intelligence compensates.



shortfatbalduglyman
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04 Jul 2022, 10:09 pm

Double Retired wrote:
My understanding is NTs are uncomfortable around people who are not like them.

Being not like them is immediately considered to be a defect.

___________________________________________________________________________

not all neurotypicals are uncomfortable around people who are not like them.

some autistics are uncomfortable around people who are not like them.

8 billion people in the world.

nobody is perfect.

there is no such thing as perfection.

the perfect character for a CIA interrogator differs from the perfect character of a clinical psychologist.

every situation is different.



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04 Jul 2022, 11:38 pm

Aet1985 wrote:
That is what annoys me I am far from perfect but I consider myself intelligent such as with difference subjects space study, history, science and so on, I consider myself a very deep thinker and can think in vivid ''HD'' pictures, I am very down to earth but find myself questioning humanity and where we are going, or can be ''critical'' and scathing of society norms and thought, even though I am a nice person despite preferring my own thoughts and imagination, very rarely am I giving a chance, then many NTs wonder what is wrong or why does he get angry and emotional?


Einstein wrote a short essay and changed physics, but that only worked because people were waiting for such a paper. As a strong rule, the more advanced your thinking, the higher the odds that you will be ignored without using salesmen's tricks, and making the core of your presentation something that quite dull people can feel they understand. It sounds as if you have quite a bit in common with TV's Dr. Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory. His mother had to point out that people don't like it when he makes them feel stupid.



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05 Jul 2022, 7:01 am

Aet1985 wrote:
why do us Aspies have issues socially or with groups?


I can answer for myself. In one on one situations, I have trouble reading, understanding, and responding to non-verbal signals to the point where I find myself getting triggered and panicking.

In group situations, I quickly get overwhelmed by all the noise, attention, and tight groups. Trying to break through and start conversations caused the problems in the first paragraph.


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05 Jul 2022, 8:45 am

Aet1985 wrote:
That is what annoys me I am far from perfect but I consider myself intelligent such as with difference subjects space study, history, science and so on, I consider myself a very deep thinker and can think in vivid ''HD'' pictures, I am very down to earth but find myself questioning humanity and where we are going, or can be ''critical'' and scathing of society norms and thought, even though I am a nice person despite preferring my own thoughts and imagination, very rarely am I giving a chance, then many NTs wonder what is wrong or why does he get angry and emotional?

Question: Have you made point of seeking out, as potential friends, other deep thinkers who share one or more of your interests?

The majority of people are not deep thinkers and not interested in lengthy discussions about science or history. But there do exist some other people out there who are deeply interested in these things.


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rse92
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05 Jul 2022, 8:57 am

Aet1985 wrote:
That is what annoys me I am far from perfect but I consider myself intelligent such as with difference subjects space study, history, science and so on, I consider myself a very deep thinker and can think in vivid ''HD'' pictures, I am very down to earth but find myself questioning humanity and where we are going, or can be ''critical'' and scathing of society norms and thought, even though I am a nice person despite preferring my own thoughts and imagination, very rarely am I giving a chance, then many NTs wonder what is wrong or why does he get angry and emotional?


You have issues socially because you question humanity and are critical, often scathing, of social norms and thought, and neurotypical people (and probably typical neurodiverse people) wonder why you get angry and emotional about it.