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I have successfully determined the name of God

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calandale
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14 Aug 2007, 9:46 am

Flagg wrote:
Using a simple set of logical statements I have successfully determined the name of God.

Premise 1: God is infinite forgiveness
Premise 2: In order to forgive us, He must first pity us
Premise 3: Human folly is universal: we are all fools
Premise 4: Mr. T pities all fools
Therefore: Mr. T is God. We are all pitied.

I am genius and the first member of the offical chruch of Mr. T


You forget that His son, E, tried to spread the word.



The_Chosen_One
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15 Aug 2007, 3:09 am

S, E said U will B sent to L if U do not B-lieve, So make sure U R A B-liever, or U will B L-bound.


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jrknothead
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15 Aug 2007, 5:18 am

Naw man, the true name of god is Popeye the Sailor... he reveals this to us in the all encompassing statement "I yam what I yam"



The_Chosen_One
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15 Aug 2007, 5:41 pm

Paul McCartney is God, for 2 reasons:

I am, he is, you are, he is, you are me and we are all together. - I am the Walrus

The Walrus was Paul - Glass Onion.

So therefore, God is a Walrus named Paul.

He is the most successful songwriter ever, and has therefore spread the word further than anyone.


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Karma decides what must happen, and that includes everyone.


jfrmeister
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15 Aug 2007, 8:57 pm

Flagg wrote:
Using a simple set of logical statements I have successfully determined the name of God.

Premise 1: God is infinite forgiveness
Premise 2: In order to forgive us, He must first pity us
Premise 3: Human folly is universal: we are all fools
Premise 4: Mr. T pities all fools
Therefore: Mr. T is God. We are all pitied.

I am genius and the first member of the offical chruch of Mr. T


Dear FSM NOOOO!! !! We're not starting down that "Church of whatever" thing that werbert started. Does he even still post here??



techstepgenr8tion
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15 Aug 2007, 9:57 pm

Anubis wrote:
No, all hail Chuck Norris!! !!


Really? I thought he was the boogieman's closet-monster.



MrMark
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15 Aug 2007, 10:05 pm

Flagg wrote:
Using a simple set of logical statements I have successfully determined the name of God.

Premise 1: God is infinite forgiveness
Premise 2: In order to forgive us, He must first pity us
Premise 3: Human folly is universal: we are all fools
Premise 4: Mr. T pities all fools
Therefore: Mr. T is God. We are all pitied.

I am genius and the first member of the offical chruch of Mr. T

Your syllogism is flawed in at least 3 places.

Flagg wrote:
Why does the Christian god always being black in flims always feel so cliche?

George Burns was not black.

JonnyBGoode wrote:
Pugly wrote:
Flagg wrote:
Why does the Christian god always being black in flims always feel so cliche?


Because only black dudes look good wearing white...


Image

Myth busted! :lol:

Thank-you. Therefore, Flagg is not a genius, being black in films is not always cliche, and only dudes wearing white look good. :wink:


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The_Chosen_One
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15 Aug 2007, 10:58 pm

2 more reasons confirming Paul McCartney is God

He has communicated with Mother Mary, who was speaking words of wisdom - Let It Be

He knew Lady Madonna intimately - Lying on your bed, listen to the music playing in your head.

Plus he has risen from the dead; Sgt Pepper's and Abbey Road sleeves.


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Pagans are people too, not just victims of a religious cleansing program. Universal harmony for all!!

Karma decides what must happen, and that includes everyone.


jfrmeister
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16 Aug 2007, 9:05 am

MrMark wrote:
Flagg wrote:
Using a simple set of logical statements I have successfully determined the name of God.

Premise 1: God is infinite forgiveness
Premise 2: In order to forgive us, He must first pity us
Premise 3: Human folly is universal: we are all fools
Premise 4: Mr. T pities all fools
Therefore: Mr. T is God. We are all pitied.

I am genius and the first member of the offical chruch of Mr. T

Your syllogism is flawed in at least 3 places.

Flagg wrote:
Why does the Christian god always being black in flims always feel so cliche?

George Burns was not black.

JonnyBGoode wrote:
Pugly wrote:
Flagg wrote:
Why does the Christian god always being black in flims always feel so cliche?


Because only black dudes look good wearing white...


Image

Myth busted! :lol:

Thank-you. Therefore, Flagg is not a genius, being black in films is not always cliche, and only dudes wearing white look good. :wink:


What would we do without your wisdom MrMark?



MrMark
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16 Aug 2007, 10:22 am

jfrmeister wrote:
What would we do without your wisdom MrMark?


As my mother used to say in response to, "Mom, where's my [whatever]?"...

"I'm sure I don't know."


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18 Aug 2007, 9:34 pm

Mr. T has a speech impediment - a lisp. Possibly a cleft palette. I have proof too. I am not a Christian but I read the beginning part of the King James version bible and God (oops, I mean Mr. T) says things like, "He hath no....."

Speech therapist working w/ Mr. T: HAS!! ! NOT HATH. Sound it out. H A S
The King James version does not have a copyright date either.

Mr. T saves! (He is here to save us, right?) By clipping double coupons and shopping wisely.
Mr. T does have dark skin, btw. Sexy jewelry too - shows off that white robe.


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The_Chosen_One
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19 Aug 2007, 10:41 pm

Jesus Saves -- at the Commonwealth Bank!


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Pagans are people too, not just victims of a religious cleansing program. Universal harmony for all!!

Karma decides what must happen, and that includes everyone.


calandale
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19 Aug 2007, 11:03 pm

C'thulhu saves...in case he's hungry later.



jrknothead
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20 Aug 2007, 8:13 am

Jesus Saves... but Moses Invests!



The_Chosen_One
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20 Aug 2007, 11:12 pm

Jesus said to Peter 'come forth, come forth'.... But he tripped and came fifth.


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Pagans are people too, not just victims of a religious cleansing program. Universal harmony for all!!

Karma decides what must happen, and that includes everyone.