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Kianna
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11 Aug 2022, 11:28 am

For example I’m at work and my client - I’m a caregiver ask me if I’m ok … but this isn’t the first time . Most of my life people often ask me if I’m ok .. I don’t get it . I guess casue Mabe I go though moods of not talking much ? Or some days I’m more tired then others ? Like I seriously don’t get it and my bf does same thing . I will feel perfectly normal and he will say are you ok ? And the most frustrating part is these people never tell me why they ask this even though I will repeat yeah why ? They just shake their head and say no reason ! ! God I dint understand typical people . It makes me feel like I’m being wierd somehow . Anyone else experienced this ?



Twilightprincess
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11 Aug 2022, 11:31 am

Yep, I've experienced this. Some people think that there must be something wrong if one is quiet or not smiling all the time.


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DanielW
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11 Aug 2022, 11:46 am

When it happens to me, its my facial expression. It doesn't match my actual mood or it isn't concealing the fact that am not it a good mood.



StrayCat81
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11 Aug 2022, 2:09 pm

That happens when humans notice we act differently. Depending on response, they might become hostile, so I'd recommend being very cautious here...



klanka
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11 Aug 2022, 5:07 pm

This doesn't happen to me, so can't say why it happens



Pteranomom
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11 Aug 2022, 5:15 pm

You are giving off some sign that you might not be ok, and they are checking to see how you are doing because they care about you.

They might not actually be aware enough of what different moods and expressions look like to be able to verbalize what made them think something might be wrong, or after you said you were ok they may have felt silly for asking.



lostonearth35
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11 Aug 2022, 5:29 pm

Could be a case of RBF, where a person unintentionally looks angry or upset, even when they aren't at all. Even though RBF is as common in males as it is in females, people in western society tend to think more negatively of women who look that way.

And of course, Americans generally think anyone who isn't talking loud or smiling constantly must have something seriously wrong with them it's usually the other way around.



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11 Aug 2022, 5:38 pm

People at work ask me if I'm okay because I'm quiet and zone out a lot (the work I do is really repetitive, so I kind of just listen to podcasts and turn my brain off so I don't die of boredom lmao). Today, after asking a couple times, one of my managers said that she couldn't tell if I was mad or sad, and when I explained this she just went "Oh," and didn't ask me if I was okay again.



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11 Aug 2022, 8:47 pm

I used to be asked if I took "uppers" because I was so "hyper" when I was a young adult.



Blue_Star
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11 Aug 2022, 9:21 pm

I have a naturally slightly frowning mouth when my face is neutral. When I have a lil smile, it looks like my mouth is straight across. When I get a comment (such as at work), I basically say what I did above, but I also start giving that co-worker the large mouth creepy smile after. Sometimes I'll even do a slow head turn while holding it.

It's almost always a man saying I should smile more or asking why I'm not smiling. F that. Keep that old-fashioned sh!t to yourself. Occasionally there are creepy religious undertones (always Xian) too.



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11 Aug 2022, 9:56 pm

It happens all of the time to me and always has. Atypical body language.


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HeroOfHyrule
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12 Aug 2022, 12:14 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I used to be asked if I took "uppers" because I was so "hyper" when I was a young adult.

A couple of my coworkers always tell me to "slow down" because I'm so fast when I walk and do tasks. I just get really restless if I do things slower. I don't know if it's my ADHD, or my need for movement from the sensory aspect of ASD, but I just can't handle it...

If I'm walking back to my department and I get stuck behind one of my coworkers I also get internally frustrated, because they all walk so slow compared to me and I have to slow down. :lol:



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12 Aug 2022, 1:10 pm

I get asked that question all the time. I have this very Mick-Avory-like face.


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12 Aug 2022, 2:38 pm

There could be a lot of different reasons why

Your post does not contain enough information to answer your question "why"

Precious lil "people" keep asking me "are you ok?"

Almost always the answer is "yes"

Even if I am not "ok" there is nothing they could do to "help" my worthless corpse

Maybe they are being manipulative

They are just annoying but they are not aware of it

Which reminds me:. In counseling, the correct answer to "how are you doing?" Is "perfect". All other answers are wrong and the punishment for a wrong answer is 5150. If the answer is "perfect", then the counseling session is over

Those precious lil "people" put up a farce/facade that they "care", but the only thing they are willing to do and know how to do, is flap their traps. Like (smoke and mirrors)

A woman and I pushed a man's car. He gave me five bucks. I took it. He offered her cash. "It's good to help people. Thank you for letting us help you". She acted like she dragged him out of a burning building. It was like she stole the Nobel peace prize



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12 Aug 2022, 2:49 pm

In the UK when people ask "Are you alright" or "Are You okay", they're just saying 'Hello', and the required response is to say something like "Yes thanks, and you?" or simply to reply by saying 'Alright'. I was unaware of this for much of my adult life, and used to take it as a genuine expression of curiosity or concern about my wellbeing, and would often be taken aback by the question and say "What?" This in turn would lead to a certain amount of uneasiness and lack of mutual understanding all round.

I eventually worked all this out, and these days just give the required response. It occurs to me though that the situation in other cultures may differ from that of the UK, and that when someone asks if you're okay, they may be genuinely concerned about your wellbeing. That's sometimes the case here as well of course, but if so, they'll ask it in a very different tone of voice.


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BrantaBranta
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12 Aug 2022, 3:22 pm

Wow, thought I was the only one and it resulted because of my mask face and stiff muscles.

I get asked this by random bystanders on the street all the time when I'm out on my walks. It's always asked in a suspicious manner, and it others my presence in a place. It doesn't usually seem to come out of a place of genuine concern
A few of those times have resulted in police calls on me and being swarmed by cops because someone apparently thought I was high on drugs or otherwise a potential threat.