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HeroOfHyrule
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20 Aug 2022, 12:19 am

Does anyone else have issues telling where people are pointing?

If someone points at something that's farther away than a foot or two, I usually can't tell what they're trying to get me to look at. People eventually have to bring me directly whatever it is to bring my attention to it. I find it hard to follow their gaze and where they're pointing, process everything in the area being pointed at, and then pick out specifically what they're showing me.

I also have problems with pointing to show others things. I prefer to just bring them over to it and touch it to make sure they get what I'm showing them.

People are always bewildered by the fact that I can't tell where they're pointing and it makes me embarrassed. I've had problems with this since I was a toddler, and sometimes I get frustrated at myself and just ignore what people are trying to show me so I don't have to struggle to figure it out, especially if I'm already stressed out or overstimulated.



Double Retired
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20 Aug 2022, 10:31 am

I am now picturing driving my car with my bride sitting next to me....

"GO THAT WAY!" With a point. And she should've learned by now there's no point in doing that. I don't know what she's pointing to.

:?


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HeroOfHyrule
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20 Aug 2022, 10:57 am

I'm legitimately glad that I'm not the only one with an issue like this. I always hear about autistic people having problems pointing to show others things, but rarely anything about us having issues with others pointing, unless it's phrased as if we just somehow don't notice and/or care about it. I do notice when other people point and will try hard to figure out what they're showing me, I just can't tell where they're pointing. :?



Double Retired
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20 Aug 2022, 1:53 pm

Here comes some blatant, unfounded speculation. Attach weight to it at your own risk.

I sometimes wonder whether some of the problem is that Aspies want "definitely correct" but NTs will settle for "probably good enough". So the NTs are more comfortable with imprecision because often their guesses will be right...and "often" isn't what I want.


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Pteranomom
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21 Aug 2022, 2:21 am

My kids have trouble with this, too. It helps if they come stand next to me so they can "sight" down my arm... Otherwise we just have to direct them to it. "Go forward. Forward. Turn left. Now bend down. Stick out your hand. There!"



HeroOfHyrule
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21 Aug 2022, 9:00 am

Pteranomom wrote:
My kids have trouble with this, too. It helps if they come stand next to me so they can "sight" down my arm... Otherwise we just have to direct them to it. "Go forward. Forward. Turn left. Now bend down. Stick out your hand. There!"

I usually have to try standing right next to someone and looking straight out in the direction their arm is pointing, too. From early on I figured out that if I do that I can sometimes tell what people are pointing at. I haven't seen anyone else do that before so it's interesting to hear that your kids do that, too. lol



HeroOfHyrule
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21 Aug 2022, 9:04 am

Double Retired wrote:
Here comes some blatant, unfounded speculation. Attach weight to it at your own risk.

I sometimes wonder whether some of the problem is that Aspies want "definitely correct" but NTs will settle for "probably good enough". So the NTs are more comfortable with imprecision because often their guesses will be right...and "often" isn't what I want.

I definitely prefer to just bring people to things and touch the item, since I'm worried about pointing being inaccurate and misdirecting people. Other allistic people don't have issues with pointing though, and can usually tell exactly where someone else is pointing, which is bizarre to me. I don't get why I can't do that. :?



Edna3362
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21 Aug 2022, 9:10 am

Most at the time.

It's not just the pointing fingers apparently, it also involves some eye contact and angling that from the pointing finger.
That's not what my instinct does, nor what I'd do first or at all.

Heck, it's almost just as worse when pointing with lips are involved.


I also don't get it why not just they hand it to me or something.
Or even the point of asking me to pass stuff to them when they could easily just get up and reach it at all.

Maybe it's almost like small talk. Except it's functional? Except it's not necessarily practical. It's annoying when it's unnecessary. It's not like they're not abled bodied.

"On/in/at/etc. the X" they say. I say "Which??" "Where?" Or even "What??"


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League_Girl
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21 Aug 2022, 10:19 pm

Honestly it helps when people tell you what they are pointing at.


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CockneyRebel
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21 Aug 2022, 10:36 pm

I also have a hard time with that. Even when people are telling me what they're pointing at, I still can't tell.


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