Being Expected to Like ALL Disabled People Bcuz yr Autistic?

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Joe90 has to close her mind to survive in her own life because she's surrounded by bigots and dinosaurs and she can't stand up against them.

Anyway people are people to me. Respect where respect is due.

A few years ago I was listening to a radio show called "the coming out show" on our local GLBTetc radio station, in which a woman was recounting her experiences as a teen and early 20s lesbian discovering she was not alone.

She described going to a well known Melbourne lesbian pub at 18yo (calm down Americans, that's drinking age here) and discovering an entire pub full of women *just like her*! ! Revelation! She built her new gay social life around the people she met there.

But as she grew older, she expanded her group of friends and grew out of going to the pub every Saturday night, until one day maybe ten years later she decided to go back for old times sake. And discovered the place was full of people who had *nothing at all in common with her* except that they were lesbians...

We all know that if you've met one person with autism, you've met *one person* with autism. Similarly, when you're first diagnosed, it may seem places like WP are full of people *just like you*, but they're not, they're mostly people who've got nothing in common with you except that they've all got aspergers/autism. You've got a lot of common experiences (otherwise a forum like this would be pointless), but you're all different.

Other disabled people are just people, mostly with nothing in common with you except that they've got a disability. You're under no more obligation to like them than any other random stranger you might meet.

I drove wheelchair taxis in the 1980s and met lots of people with a fairly diverse range of disabilities. Even in a city the size of Melbourne I was meeting the same passengers from one week to the next and I got to know a lot of regulars. Most of them were great people, but just like any other random group, there were one or two rather unpleasant characters too.

It doesn't matter whether we, as autistics, are treated badly. We still shouldn't treat others badly.

We shouldn't go down to the level of the bullies. We have to be above them.

Murderers shouldn't justify themselves being murderers because "but other people murder people, so why can't I?"

When somebody justifies criminal actions because "other people do it," I don't feel sympathy for that person. I encounter this sort of logic in criminals all the time.

Perhaps, I'm using an extreme example. But my point, really, is that you must follow your own notions, rather than fall prey to the notions of others.

I would never misunderstand or make fun of people with disabilities, as usually a lot of people with disabilities have low self-esteem and just want to be accepted by society and treated with respect.

Bullying is not in my nature even when I was a small child. When I was at school there was this girl with one arm, and because I'd never seen a person like that before I was a bit afraid of it when I first discovered it one summer out in the playground. Some kids would bully another kid who has a difference they're afraid of, but intuitively, making fun or bullying her was not what I was intending to do. Instead I became fascinated, and when I got home from school I tucked my left arm in my sleeve and did normal everyday things in my house and backyard with just one arm, to see what life was like for her. I wanted to be her friend but I didn't know her really and I was pleased she had friends to play with. If she had been rejected and on her own I probably would have made an attempt to make friends with her.
If only all kids reacted like that instead of bullying like some do.

Speaking of bullying, some people see rejection as bullying, same as when you won't talk or interact with them. Some feel bullied when you call them out on their rude behavior and set boundaries. They then scream ableist when you won't tolerate rudeness.

Possible trigger Warning:
Sometimes giving people the benefit of the doubt ,whom appear to be disabled but are not in reality , like detecting some one with psychopathy , and misunderstanding that they are not actually a variably disabled person . Has cost me the life of a loved one . Had no idea this slow appearing person was aligned with a group of criminals .
Would like to think it was a exceptional , one off situation . But had no idea how deep the situation went until
Doing my research . It became crazy making , turned the situation into a special interest . But even then , one must get on with it , and pretend the best normalacy one can. Years later still cannot get dept of justice to observe all the facts . But am a bit less likely to give the benefit of the doubt this days . These were not physically disabled people .
But anyone can turn into a ??? Lousy person .?
Hard not to develop that Equal opportunity hating person . But I do not think that is what life is meant for .

I feel safer around people who have disabilities.