Is this no wonder I have few friends and not met anyone new?

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chris1989
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02 Sep 2022, 9:49 am

I haven't really found anything that is worth going to meet new people where I live. I mean I've been persuaded to try a book club but I won't even go to them because it may involve having to talk about a specific book I'm not interested in. I'll probably go to one and they maybe talking for example about Fifty Shades of Grey. The next week they might talk about Harry Potter both of which I'm not interested in.

In my own time I seem to find myself interested in writing lists and stuff and coming up with ideas for a book I'd like to write and if I do go out, its usually on my own locally looking around shops etc but there are not many groups involved with meeting people doing those things I do. I seem to think other people out there are having more fun all except me because they've got more friends than me.

I have been asked to if I'd go back into volunteering but I don't really feel like going back. Some of these places like charity shops which I like to visit, I don't really want to volunteer in because sometimes these places have not many people working in them, I had that experience when I last did volunteering. It bored after a while and there were times when I didn't turn up. I do remember my dad getting me into a place to meet people but many of them there were more disabled than me (had down syndrome and conditions like that) and I did feel like I fitted in and didn't really want to be there.

I seem to think my options or other people's options given to me on meeting new people are rather limited because I won't get back into volunteering in a charity shop or something, I won't go down on my own to a pub or something on a weekend in the hope of meeting someone which may not even happen especially if I am on my own sitting at a table with a drink looking around for an opportunity to see someone I like and chat with them and I worried I'll come across as weird and socially awkward to the person I'm talking to. I seem to feel as though I aspire to around a social environment with other ''normal'' people like those I see in a selfie at a bar on a weekend evening even though clubs and stuff like that are not my thing.



Mona Pereth
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02 Sep 2022, 8:01 pm

chris1989 wrote:
In my own time I seem to find myself interested in writing lists and stuff and coming up with ideas for a book I'd like to write

What is the genre/topic of this book you'd like to write?

chris1989 wrote:
and if I do go out, its usually on my own locally looking around shops etc but there are not many groups involved with meeting people doing those things I do.

How have you gone about looking for groups of like-minded people? (Perhaps someone here can suggest ways of looking for them that you hadn't thought of?) Also, what specific interests/activities of yours do you feel you could enjoy sharing with others?

chris1989 wrote:
I seem to think other people out there are having more fun all except me because they've got more friends than me.

A common problem for us autistic folks....

I would suggest that you look for groups of people who share specific interests of yours. The question is how to do this. Reasonable answers to this question will depend both on your specific interests and on what you've tried so far.


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that1weirdgrrrl
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05 Sep 2022, 2:12 pm

Since you are interested in writing a book, I recommend checking out Nanowrimo. It's a global community of writers, who sometimes meet up in person. I've made some very good friends from the group.

(Apparently you have to sign up to view the forums now: https://forums.nanowrimo.org/top?period=weekly)

They also have topics on the forum to get help with your writing.


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