It’s 2022. How do people not know an Aspie when they see 1?

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CubsBullsBears
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07 Sep 2022, 6:12 pm

Either that or people are just cruel. Why are brand new managers who were born in the 2000s being just as nasty as a middle aged Karen? And how in the world do people not understand that you can be a manager and not be a b**ch!?!


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CarlM
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07 Sep 2022, 6:20 pm

I think we will need more specifics about the situation to provide an answer.


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r00tb33r
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07 Sep 2022, 6:20 pm

I think a day when they just see you as a person and not something else is pretty good. I don't wish to be seen as "different".


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CubsBullsBears
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07 Sep 2022, 6:32 pm

CarlM wrote:
I think we will need more specifics about the situation to provide an answer.
I will later. Just don’t feel like it rn.


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kraftiekortie
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07 Sep 2022, 6:55 pm

People usually can't tell if someone is "Aspie" at first glance. Many autistic people don't look "unusual" at all.

In order for us to advise you with some decency, we would need more details of the encounter.



jimmyjazzuk
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07 Sep 2022, 7:18 pm

They probably have a extreme stereotype from TV in their head which you don't fit.

Also..

"Give a low man one ounce of power and he’ll throw ten thousand pounds of bricks on your head."



CubsBullsBears
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07 Sep 2022, 7:46 pm

One of the shift managers, whom I’ll call manager 1(the same one I said on here that I wanted to date)was giving me a hard time for something I thought was someone else’s responsibility. She said “I don’t mean to be disrespectful but” and then proceeded to say some snarky stuff(example: I’m not your maid). I said back to her that that really is disrespectful. Another manager, who I’ll call manager 2 then said “she’s not being disrespectful, she’s telling you to do your job”.

I’ll just stop right there. In case you haven’t figured it out, this guy somehow does not understand that you can be a manager and not be a prick. I hate him so much just for that.

After that, I went to do a delivery. On my way there I get told to come back bc the customer showed up at the store. After I did that, there were 2 different misunderstandings that seemingly made manager 1 even more mad bc she yelled out to me “CBB, you can go home!”.

I would say that manager 1 lost her chance to ever go out with me, although I’ll guess she would never wanna date me anyway, so she prob wouldn’t be feeling any sort of loss, bc I have a totally unfair disadvantage in this world.

Before I said “to two co workers, screw you”. Make that 4. :roll:


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Last edited by CubsBullsBears on 07 Sep 2022, 8:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.

CubsBullsBears
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07 Sep 2022, 8:19 pm

Here’s something that bothers me: manager 1 is YOUNGER than me and manager 2 can’t be much older than I am. It’s one thing to be a cranky old boss getting pissy with employees, but you would think that no one in my age group would talk to me like that. I don’t care that they’re technically my manager. There is no need to be snarky and it is not going to encourage me to be any better at my job than I am now. It’ll only make me resent people, and potentially make me not wanna work there anymore.

Manager 1 wasn’t even a manager when I started. Someone who says the things she said being promoted like that seems to be a microcosm of what kind of world we live in.


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Last edited by CubsBullsBears on 07 Sep 2022, 8:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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07 Sep 2022, 8:32 pm

Maybe this might inspire you to go to college.....

Fast food is like that....it just sucks.



jimmyjazzuk
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07 Sep 2022, 8:43 pm

If you think it's more them than you, look for new work in your free time.

In the meantime work on giving them nothing to criticise you for and stay out of their way as much as you can.



CockneyRebel
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07 Sep 2022, 10:08 pm

Sweet Pea hugs


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lostonearth35
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08 Sep 2022, 12:28 am

No one suspected I was an aspie until I was diagnosed in 2001. I didn't even know what Asperger's was until then. Most people can't tell someone is on the spectrum just by appearance. That's why they're always saying stupid things like "You don't look autistic" or "You can't be autistic because I know someone who is and you're nothing like them."



temp1234
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08 Sep 2022, 3:12 am

I still don't really understand your story.

I can understand that two people were not nice. Being snarky or biased is simply bad as a person, regardless of their position, age, gender etc. You get such people everywhere. They are simply bad people. As such they are not fit for their positions. However, if the company culture is rotten, then such people get promoted. You'd better find a job in a civilized company.



kraftiekortie
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08 Sep 2022, 7:23 am

I went through similar crap as you.

That's why I decided, screw it, let me get an office job.



Trachea
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08 Sep 2022, 7:36 am

People without disabilities have basically zero idea of disabled people existing in their brain unless they know someone closely and even then its an abstract idea. You can tell someone your exact issues and they will act sympathetic and when you get a symptom they WILL take it personally, 99/100 times. But I can't really blame them because autistic people are the same way to other autistics too so, people are people.

But I send you my sympathies regardless, in hopes it gives you at least a sense of camaraderie and brings you some little strength in adversity :heart: Keep dodging the a-holes! :ninja:



shortfatbalduglyman
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08 Sep 2022, 11:43 am

Your post does not specify if you disclosed your official diagnosis to human resources and requested accommodations. If not, please do so

There is a lot of misinformation about autism

Some managers felony convictions, drug addictions, and psychiatric diagnoses. Just like some people that are not managers have felony convictions, drug addictions, and psychiatric diagnoses.

If you want get a different job

However, people change jobs

Sometimes people change personalities.

Besides, the situation that you described in your post, is not necessarily a representative sample of your job.

The situation in your post, could happen in other jobs too

Other jobs could be better or worse than your job

I have gone to a lot of job interviews

Sometimes you meet your supervisor and manager before you get hired. However, even if you do meet them, it's just a brief conversation. Every situation is different. Just because the manager or anyone else acted civilized during the onboarding, doesn't guarantee that they will be civilized ever again. (Facade, farce, first impressions)

Sometimes you don't even meet the supervisor or manager before you get hired

When I started my current job, two years ago, there was no Front End Supervisor. One month later they hired a Front End Supervisor. That one lasted one year. Then the next Front End Supervisor lasted four months. Then the next Front End Supervisor lasted three months

When I started my current job, there was a Front End Manager. Now there is no front end manager

So what use is it, if you meet your supervisor and manager before you get hired, when the supervisor and manager might not even work there the next day?

High turnover

About your post title:. Even clinical psychologists have to sit down a perform an assessment, before making a diagnosis. My diagnosis took ten hours and five hundred bucks. (San Diego 2003). According to diagnostic protocol, even the clinical psychologist is not allowed to just look at someone and make an official diagnosis

Based on your post, it doesn't sound (to me) like your managers were clinical psychologists (or anything like that). Not everyone has a PhD in Psychology. People that are not clinical psychologists, do not have a right to diagnose autism.

Your managers might not know an about autism.

Unless their field involves autism, they are not required to know anything about autism.

Reasonable accommodation

American Disability Act

However, psychologists, like everyone else, have subconscious and

Anyone could be rude to anyone

However not everyone is having sex with the boss