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Greentea
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09 Aug 2007, 4:17 pm

By scapegoats I mean that in the politics of the group, be it family, friends. evening class or work, when something goes wrong because of someone's selfishness or negligence, I'm the one blamed (even if I have no direct bearing in the issue). It happens, I think, because I'm the only one in the group who doesn't have the cunning to make others look bad and myself look good (manipulation).

Anyone else with a similar experience?


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09 Aug 2007, 4:18 pm

yeah I am a scapegoat; yet I am the most talented and creative member of my family.



Aspie_Chav
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09 Aug 2007, 4:42 pm

Same here; however, since I have an interest in human psychology, darwinion psychology, these monkies often get a surprise as I know exactly what they are doing.

I might a silver-back am a David Attenborough. I put down some snare traps and the primative monky will not see that I did it as they assume I am a less intellegent version of themselves.



krex
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09 Aug 2007, 4:43 pm

yes


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09 Aug 2007, 5:47 pm

Thank you



Postperson
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09 Aug 2007, 7:03 pm

yes, i'm always to blame. the family scapegoat, the workplace scapegoat.

i don't know how you escape from scapegoatism, but it's useful to consider (this is a bibilical thing) that when people point the finger at you, they really should be pointing it at themselves, it's like projection, they project all the stuff they don't like or want to admit about themselves onto a scapegoat, so really they're talking about themselves and telling you all sorts of things they wouldn't normally reveal.



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09 Aug 2007, 7:20 pm

Pretty much most of the time. It took a long time for my mom to pick up on that one.


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dosh
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10 Aug 2007, 7:31 am

I have always thought that, in an earlier age I would have been burnt at the stake as a witch! This is of course my way of feeling superior about their irrational behaviour.



girl7000
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10 Aug 2007, 10:29 am

Greentea wrote:
By scapegoats I mean that in the politics of the group, be it family, friends. evening class or work, when something goes wrong because of someone's selfishness or negligence, I'm the one blamed (even if I have no direct bearing in the issue). It happens, I think, because I'm the only one in the group who doesn't have the cunning to make others look bad and myself look good (manipulation).

Anyone else with a similar experience?


Yes, I have problems like this with my family (and some of my former 'friends') too.



Mishcana
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10 Aug 2007, 11:56 am

Almost always. It seems everything always my fault (maybe it is ;).



samtoo
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10 Aug 2007, 3:04 pm

I couldn't hack it if I were picked on to that extent. I think I've learnt to overcome that and turn that situation around... I think I'm rarely a scapegoat... and I get damn angry when I am... see I'm really self-protective these days... that's not to say I don't have days where I wouldn't be vulnerable in that situation, but a lot of the time I'm capable... I have to say lack of sleep is very bad for you socially... I'd recomend excercise, martial arts, sleep... things like this are very good for your day to day confidence.


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LKL
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10 Aug 2007, 3:13 pm

I feel like it's dishonorable to complain about my co-workers to my boss, or report them when they do something improper, but unfortunately they do not seem to have the same reserve with regard to me. I've been reported for swearing after someone hung up on me on the phone and for finishing someone else's computer game (the person that reported me made it seem like I was the only one that had been playing).



iamnotaparakeet
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10 Aug 2007, 3:33 pm

When I work in a Deli my coworkers always had blamed me if a customer wasn't being waited on, even if I was already helping another customer. Even when I was given cleaning jobs and deadlines, if a customer wasn't looked after, I was at fault. I decided to turn in the cases where my coworkers were ignoring customers and my coworkers turned in a BS story of my threatening one of them, so I got fired and banned from the blasted Wal-Mart. I hope those people will be in hell.



thyme
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10 Aug 2007, 9:59 pm

Yes it happens to me at work and sometimes in my family a well. I guess because i'm the odd-man out. Knowing its unfair and having to stand-up for myself and having no one else to defend me. And then when you do stand-up for yourself you are told you are a trouble-maker. Your the one who has trouble getting along with the group.



iamnotaparakeet
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10 Aug 2007, 10:09 pm

thyme wrote:
Yes it happens to me at work and sometimes in my family a well. I guess because i'm the odd-man out. Knowing its unfair and having to stand-up for myself and having no one else to defend me. And then when you do stand-up for yourself you are told you are a trouble-maker. Your the one who has trouble getting along with the group.


My stepdad explained that a family is like a lever problem; the farther out one is the more the others have to move away to keep a balance. I.e. his excuse to treat me like an outsider.



Greentea
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11 Aug 2007, 7:36 am

thyme, I so identify with every word you wrote. I'm invariably the mean one for standing up against their abuse.


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