Things I Don't Get

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Joe,

You started a thread saying you didn't want to be considered a narcissist, because you care about people and you have a lot of empathy. Other people commented in your thread by posting narcissism tests, which are related to whether we care about other people's feelings. Your thread seems to be why the topic of empathy has come up, and no offence but you're the main person who ever raises that topic because you're concerned about autistic people having a stigma about no empathy. You've started many threads about autism and empathy over the years. That's where the kajillion posts come from. Otherwise I seldom see empathy mentioned by other members.

I just did a side by side comparison of yours and Isabella's post and although it's not accurate as join dates are different and entries could be other posters the results are as follows:

Number of times Empathy was used in a post.

Joe90 = 650
Isabella = 194

You were also the first one to bring up empathy in your Just a Ramble thread from February.

What I'm getting at is , you really need to try and stop thinking about what others think of you here, it's irrelevant. It may feel important to you but unless you are talking about your friends it should be water off a ducks back.

And then people wonder why I take things personally when people make references in other threads and think it's about me or a thread I have made. This time it WAS about a thread I'd made, after all this time trying to tell me that people don't do it.
So cheers, you've just set off my paranoia again.

What I don't get: When people reassure me that their rants aren't referring to me or my threads, yet they go and do it!

(Yes, I've done it now too).

What I don't get: insult by insinuation.
Or is is association?

For example if someone says they hate people who like X, and they know you happen to like X, is that an insult against you personally?
I'm told it's not an insult.
But I think if they know it is triggering to you it's being done to be hurtful.

^^ Are you talking about that weirdo singer from BMTH ?

I don't get : how to take responsibility for something so involuntary and unpredictable without the accessibility to solve it.

Sure, I'll put up with this in another 2 years -- that's when I'm sure I can afford to AND crossing certain time lines of my development.

But am I still patient enough for dealing with emotional liability?
Or, can I actually resolve and grow that fast within a span of two years?

Figuring is fine, I get the hows from the higher knowledge but...
Expecting me to just will the damn out of it?? I wish. I wish it is that easy. I don't get how people could just say as if it's that easy.

They never elaborate the tricky or hard parts, they just assume.
Even if their intent is to reassure that it isn't, it's pissing me off and it's patronizing.



What I do get : having to convince myself that I'm this person, trapped by a condition and conditioning.
And I just need to find a cure for this condition or be unconditioned from that so I can be myself again.

So I keep telling people I'm not like always this. Or that I am not like this. Because I fear being judged or being put in a label.

I'm turning 28 soon.
I either fight, solve and figure it for good just as I do all these years or...

In two weeks, I'm giving in for good.
"Start" there for good. That I cannot convince myself anymore, I cannot do it alone anymore.

.. Then I'll give myself another 7 years before shifting my gears in a significant way.

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Raleigh's here?
Hold on. I need to back up.