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Nades
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27 Sep 2022, 7:19 am

I have a female friend who used to be quite responsive with meeting on weekends. Over the last few weeks she's been slow at responding to messages and often doesn't respond when I ask to meet up on the weekend.

She's had problems recently with her boyfriend that she said is getting her down. She's always been a bit down in the dumps for as long as I've known her but she's lost a lot of her bubbly self over the last few months.

I was thinking either wait with the usual ask once a weekend if she wants to meet up or plan something fun that's better than the usual walks.

Don't really know if anyone's had any experience with coaxing people into their normal selves and activities again?



klanka
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27 Sep 2022, 2:00 pm

what kinds of problems with the boyfriend? if shes in a bad relationship that'll do it.



Raleigh
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27 Sep 2022, 2:30 pm

She may have shut down if she's having personal problems or feeling depressed.
Is it possible to visit her?


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Nades
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28 Sep 2022, 1:39 am

Problems as in her boyfriend has gone into "providing" mode where her sexual desires go permanently ignores. This has been going on for two years.

She's messaged me back late yesterday actually saying she's feeling better now and asked how I was. Dunno about actually meeting up yet though.



klanka
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28 Sep 2022, 3:55 am

that dont sound right, something wrong with that



autisticelders
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28 Sep 2022, 8:06 am

give her some time, she may simply be overwhelmed and not feel like doing usual things. Express your concern but don't pester. Many people need alone and quiet time especially when they are upset. Don't take it personally.


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CockneyRebel
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28 Sep 2022, 8:19 am

The situation with her boyfriend explains everything.


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babybird
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28 Sep 2022, 9:53 am

At least you've heard from her.


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Nades
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28 Sep 2022, 10:26 am

I usually keep formal messages to once a week unless they're goofy or funny links I know she'll like.

She's always suffered from depressive episodes but this is the worst one I know of so far. I know her home life with her boyfriend is tepid at best (though he's never aggressive or angry with her). She doesn't like her parents too to add to the isolation she probably feels. She seemed delighted when they sold her childhood home a few months ago and moved out the town which surprised me as most would be disappointed.

I'm gonna have a nose if she's up for anything this Saturday



babybird
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28 Sep 2022, 11:38 am

Yeah that'd be a nice thing to do.


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