What made you first wonder if you could be Autistic?

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blitzkrieg
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25 Nov 2022, 11:48 pm

I was studying A-levels back in 2005 and several people in my sixth form questioned whether I had Autism. I didn't really know what it was at the beginning but soon found & and by 2009 I considered myself Autistic.



ASPartOfMe
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26 Nov 2022, 4:44 am

I noticed the lead character in the American TV series Bones was a lot like me. I also read a number of times that she had traits of Aspergers Syndrome. I said to myself "I'm probably autistic" . That was as far as it went. It was a curiosity, nothing more. I had no idea the importance of it.


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kokopelli
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26 Nov 2022, 6:13 am

I never thought it was all until I learned about Prosopagnosia and how it is often found among the Autistic.

Then one day, the son of someone I knew came by the office and while talking, he asked me if I'm Autistic. I normally wouldn't have even considered the question, but his job was working with Autistic children. I don't know what he saw that made him ask the question.

As of yet, I'm far from convinced that I actually am Autistic.



blitzkrieg
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26 Nov 2022, 11:31 pm

kokopelli wrote:
As of yet, I'm far from convinced that I actually am Autistic.


A lot of people think of the bar being really high in terms of impairment, or somebody having to look Autistic to be considered such.

If people are asking if you are Autistic, particularly if they work with Autistic folk, then there's a reasonable chance you might be. Usually people don't make such speculations for no reason.



auntblabby
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27 Nov 2022, 12:19 am

that i never got very far in life compared to my NT peers, that was the first clue. an army social worker early in 1985 came right out and told me i was autistic. it took me a long time to understand that, many decades later i figured it out enough to seek a DX from a psychiatrist.



ASPartOfMe
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27 Nov 2022, 6:11 am

auntblabby wrote:
that i never got very far in life compared to my NT peers, that was the first clue. an army social worker early in 1985 came right out and told me i was autistic. it took me a long time to understand that, many decades later i figured it out enough to seek a DX from a psychiatrist.

Pretty amazing that a social worker figured you out in 1985 because
1. Only the most severe autism was recognized at the time(Rain man was described a high functioning in the movie).

2. The person was not a psychologist or psychiatrist.


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27 Nov 2022, 6:54 am

ASPartOfMe wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
that i never got very far in life compared to my NT peers, that was the first clue. an army social worker early in 1985 came right out and told me i was autistic. it took me a long time to understand that, many decades later i figured it out enough to seek a DX from a psychiatrist.

Pretty amazing that a social worker figured you out in 1985 because
1. Only the most severe autism was recognized at the time(Rain man was described a high functioning in the movie).

2. The person was not a psychologist or psychiatrist.

psychiatric social worker. one of my waivers was from my shrink [a waiver is a permission to admit somebody into the military that has a normally disqualifying condition such as autism].



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27 Nov 2022, 8:24 pm

A co-worker flatly asked if I was autistic, which planted a very small seed in my mind.
I told a very close friend what I was asked, and they told me to watch a TV programme on autism, the seed was germinated after watching that.
Dr Google was the perfect nutrient for the new seedling.
Autism forums promoted new growth and buds were forming.
Youtube was a bud enhancer and the buds were getting bigger and fatter, but ultimate proof would be in the flavour.
After a formal diagnosis, the plant was in its finishing stage, putting all its energy into the buds.
Dankest buds I've ever tasted :nerdy:


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28 Nov 2022, 5:46 am

Was driving home one night around 2013 and put on some kind of talk radio phone in show. It blew my mind how much they were just describing me.

3 years of research and thinking followed, along with my doctor recommending I go for assessment, and then me not turning up, then I went back and asked again, went in 2016 for assessment and received diagnosis then



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28 Nov 2022, 9:56 am

I always knew I was different from others, but could not exactly put my finger on why. In third grade, my class was tested and I found out that I was in the highly to exceptionally gifted category. At that school, there was no one like me before, so they let me work through their gifted materials that they had. I went through them in two years, what should have taken at least several more years to do. My classmates treated me just the same as everyone else. However, life took a turn for the worse when we moved out of state.

At my new school, I could not find a way to fit in. Over the next few years, I was constantly bullied. It really sucks to have to hide your intelligence from your classmates. I could not be me, I had to dumb it down to survive there. It only ended when we moved to a different town when I was 16. Even there, I did not fit in, but I could hide in plain sight. I only had a few friends at the time.

Fast forward thirty or so years and I still do not fit into an average life. I simply cannot relate to most people in social settings, so I tend to live in my head most of the time. My social life has been dead since high school. I have no kids nor wife. I do not own a home. At my age, my former classmates are always discussing their grandchildren. They think I am stupid that I could not do what they did. I saw no other way to proceed on my path.



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29 Nov 2022, 10:05 pm

What amazes me is the frequency that NTs will outright ask if someone is autistic. This would be considered a blunt move. It's like an autistic outright asking an NT how much they weigh or if they have difficulty with intimacy or something like that. Nobody has ever asked me if I was autistic, but a LOT of people surely thought I was odd, strange, different, rude, quirky, weird, etc. Of course, I don't know what they were THINKING. It's possible they thought I'd snap at them if they asked if I was autistic. Maybe the people who are being asked if they're autistic are very mellow and easygoing, and thus, the curious NT feels more comfortable being so direct.



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29 Nov 2022, 11:13 pm

There was a very young boy at my church that was different. I understood that child when nobody else did. He gravitated towards me, and we formed a special bond. When he was old enough to be tested, he received an autism diagnosis. His family moved away; his parents and I kept in touch for a while, and they told me how I had been his best friend, how he warmed to me and no one else to the extent that they had even wondered if he had seen me as his mother. Yet none of that made me wonder what that said about myself. The moment that made me wonder was when I heard these words leave my mouth when speaking to my pastor: "I really miss [that boy who moved away]. He was the only kid I understood in the nursery." After I said it, I wondered. It was one thing to be able to bond with the one, but why did I feel I didn't understand all the others?

I am still not sure if I am autistic, but I'm confident I am somewhere in the ND family. At this point I am skeptical about the accuracy of the current definitions/categories. I'm pretty confident I have an autistic husband, and quite possibly an autistic daughter. There are diagnosed and self-diagnosed and armchair-diagnosed autistics and ADHDers in both my extended family and my husband's. I feel like I am halfway between autistic and ADHD without quite fitting either. "Gifted" was my label as a kid.


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Sciency_Owen
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30 Nov 2022, 5:09 am

Diagnosed at 16. My first suspicions of autism specifically came when I watched Community in 9th grade, due to the character Abed Nadir. Before that I had considered myself abnormal, but figured my social difficulties came down to the fact that I was well ahead of my peers academically, as I was aware of the stereotype that smart people were social pariahs.



usagibryan
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30 Nov 2022, 10:54 am

I don't know how this forum feels about this character but when The Big Bang Theory first appeared on TV my entire family and even some strangers would talk about how I was like Sheldon Cooper. Then thanks to the internet I learned that Sheldon Cooper was written with the characteristics of someone who has Asperger's Syndrome (even though the writers insist he isn't), then I looked up the characteristics of Asperger's Syndrome and was like "oh s**t that's me." At the time it was validating but now I see Sheldon Cooper as a not so charming character and the show as problematic, but maybe that's just me being influenced by internet opinion again. The first character I REALLY identified with was Adrian Monk, but he's described as having OCD which I was actually diagnosed with. Looking back I think Monk also had characteristics of someone on the spectrum. I was misdiagnosed with ADD before I was diagnosed with OCD before they wanted to test me for autism but never did, I also have anxiety and I think there are overlapping symptoms of all these and I'm still not sure what my deal is really.


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30 Nov 2022, 11:29 am

Even if the experts could accurately sort out their tests to diagnose 40% AS, 30% OCD, 20% Synesthesia, and 10% Narcissism, life experiences could still make you very different from someone else with the same percentages. In practice, we are lucky to even get a shrink to admit that we have more than one condition. It is like going to a paint store to get a colour match, and they only sell the primary colours.



Man
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01 Dec 2022, 8:27 am

I always knew it in some form or another.

It became most apparent in pre-school where I was pretty much the only outcast. It's not like the kids bullied me or anything, I just didn't have any friends.

Didn't know how to make friends!

Didn't even know why I needed friends as I was more than happy in my little world.

Shame it took me over two decades to figure out I'd Asperger's!