Grabbing Someone Back for Grabbing You

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Heyman27
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06 Oct 2022, 5:47 pm

Has anyone every been a crowd and someone bumps into you and the grab you by the bare arm with their bear hand to say "Excuse me?"

I really don't like being touched like that and I think part of it is due to my Asperger's, as well as being bullied by being grabbed and just not liking touch in general.

So what I was really wondering is has anyone ever grabbed someone back for grabbing them? Like if someone grabbed you by the bare arm with their bare hand did you grab them back in the same way? Or grab them off of you?

I grab people back sometimes but sometimes I don't because I'm too scared to. Anyways the reason for me grabbing them back is retaliatory because I don't like being grabbed the way so sometimes I grab them back.

Sometimes I'm too scared because I'm worried they'll get violent, but I wish I could have the confidence to grab people back more often to not get stepped on like a doormat.



CockneyRebel
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06 Oct 2022, 9:40 pm

That's one way of showing the grabber how it felt to be grabbed by them. I wouldn't recommend though. It could turn into a physical fight.


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himmellaufen
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07 Oct 2022, 2:33 am

never happened to me, must be unique to your local culture



temp1234
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07 Oct 2022, 7:28 pm

Grabbing someone in that manner is already a form of aggression. Best stay away from such animals. Whether you are scared or not, you should be wise and just leave. If the animal persists, call the police. You wouldn't want to get in legal trouble fighting back against a worthless animal.



Heyman27
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27 Oct 2022, 10:16 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
That's one way of showing the grabber how it felt to be grabbed by them. I wouldn't recommend though. It could turn into a physical fight.


Yeah as mentioned above I had considered that.

Still I just don't like it when they do that. It's just feels wrong for someone to touch you that way without your consent plus I've been bullied like that before.

What do you think I should do instead?



IsabellaLinton
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27 Oct 2022, 11:45 am

I'd likely deck them.
My partner grabbed me by the arm last week and let's just say it won't happen again.



kraftiekortie
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27 Oct 2022, 12:16 pm

The person shouldn't have grabbed you. The person was overly aggressive.

You probably bumped into the person by accident. It happens all the time. The person should have known that bumping into people is common in crowded places.

As I'm retiring in two months, I really don't want to get into a fight with somebody, and get charged with assault. I would just say something like "Excuse you," and walk away.



IsabellaLinton
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27 Oct 2022, 12:28 pm

I should clarify my partner wasn't being aggressive.
It was for my own safety.
I'd had a panic attack and tried to bolt into traffic, late at night, in the city.
Even then, I nearly decked him for it.
It was a trauma reflex.

Women deal with inappropriate touch from strangers all the time.
Men often touch women to move past them in crowded places.
It's not just our arms, but our waists, our backs, our hands, our hips, and our hair.

That whole culture needs to stop.

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autisticelders
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28 Oct 2022, 4:51 am

I avoid places where there are so many people that this could even remotely be a possibility... I hate sudden touch of any sort too and go way out of my way to avoid being in any place where people might be that close to me. Grabbing somebody back can escalate an already uncomfortable experience, but I understand the feeling of the need to defend oneself when it happens! I would say something like "don't touch me" very, very loudly!! !


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League_Girl
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28 Oct 2022, 3:06 pm

I'm crowded areas, I assume it's an accident when they bump into you. I wouldn't ho grabbing people because they could haveca flight or fight response. If you grab them, they may punch you in self defense because they got grabbed and they didn't know you so a fight or flight response kicks in. They might have a fight response. You don't ever grab strangers.


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Caz72
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28 Oct 2022, 6:13 pm

men dont grab me when im walking in a busy place and i attract a lot of men

people sometimes grab my arm if they know me and are talking to me or trying to get my attention but i dont mind that so much


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