The damage of my life being worse bc of outside forces

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CubsBullsBears
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10 Nov 2022, 12:08 am

Sometimes it feels like that maybe there's a reason no one can ever convince me to re-frame my mind into thinking more positively or having complete focus on things I can control or whatever. Maybe that reason is that life is just that damn bad.


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Rossall
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10 Nov 2022, 9:44 am

Sorry you're feeling like that.

Maybe try making a glass half full list: You've got a roof over your head, you've got food, you haven't got cancer etc. etc.


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czarsmom
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10 Nov 2022, 9:55 am

CubsBullsBears wrote:
Sometimes it feels like that maybe there's a reason no one can ever convince me to re-frame my mind into thinking more positively or having complete focus on things I can control or whatever. Maybe that reason is that life is just that damn bad.


I very much understand and can relate to feeling that life is pretty damn bad. I also identify with other people trying to convince us that we should think positively. I personally get pretty frustrated when being told to be more positive.

This world is designed for neurotypicals, overall. Some of us, myself included, were born into families that didn't understand or appreciate us, and didn't give us any type of support at all. It makes life for us pretty damn tough.


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Juliette
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10 Nov 2022, 1:58 pm

It can be good to acknowledge the truth & reality of where you’re at in life. From there, hopefully comes the will to claw your way out of that place. Been there.



CubsBullsBears
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10 Nov 2022, 2:02 pm

Juliette wrote:
It can be good to acknowledge the truth & reality of where you’re at in life. From there, hopefully comes the will to claw your way out of that place. Been there.
that seems impossible to do with all the messed up things I can’t fix. I’m all alone here. Maybe alone with some other people, but still alone in a way.


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CockneyRebel
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10 Nov 2022, 2:08 pm

My life was pretty much the same when I was your age. I got through it.

Sweet Pea hugs


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kraftiekortie
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10 Nov 2022, 3:44 pm

What is causing those feelings?

Did anything, in particular, happen?

I remember, one time, some guy said he was going to kick my butt---for no reason! I was working at a crap job with him. Then and there, I decided to quit that job and get a much better one. Then, I decided to go to college.



Juliette
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10 Nov 2022, 5:43 pm

CubsBullsBears wrote:
Juliette wrote:
It can be good to acknowledge the truth & reality of where you’re at in life. From there, hopefully comes the will to claw your way out of that place. Been there.
that seems impossible to do with all the messed up things I can’t fix. I’m all alone here. Maybe alone with some other people, but still alone in a way.


Alone can be a preferred way of being for many of us. We need & often crave it. I’m sorry you feel that your life feels impossibly difficult due to “messed up things you can’t fix.” Would it help to elaborate & share what’s happening there? Things that are out of our control can make life feel hopeless at times, but I hope that your current situation is only one chapter of your existence. Many of us here have been to hell & back at times, but holding onto the thought that everything in life is temporary, that your hopes and dreams for the future can be achieved, are not worth giving up on. It could be that you need a change of scene, a break from your current life, if possible. If you truly feel alone, WP is certainly a good place to find friends. Hang in there.



CubsBullsBears
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10 Nov 2022, 10:04 pm

Basically, it's in regard to other people's views on things. For example, people believing that people should be punished for things when there was an obvious lack of intent.

On another note, I'll address why I won't go to college; my grades were consistently mediocre, and I was told that almost all colleges required a certain GPA to be accepted in. Plus school was too rough on me to wanna continue that grind for another 2-4 years.


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kraftiekortie
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10 Nov 2022, 10:26 pm

All community colleges require is a high school diploma or equivalent. Their credits count just as much as 4-year college credits. You could also get something like a certificate which would enable you to be something like an X-ray technician.



Juliette
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11 Nov 2022, 5:05 pm

I have a great deal of respect for KK & his knowledge of what Colleges require over there. I’ e lived & worked in the US too, but most of my educational experience comes from Australia & the UK. I would imagine a diagnosis plus a minimum of a Pass in the basic subjects of Maths & English, along with a phonecall or written word from parents, would certainly assist in acceptance into further study, but only if this is where your heart lies. There are different paths to working in various fields, and quite often, you’d be surprised what can be achieved/gained by alternate routes.

School can be rough, especially if you’re on the spectrum & I’m so glad that the option of Home Education/Open University Courses/Online Learning coupled with eventual transition into Colleges/Tafes/Universities etc can make a wonderful difference. There are always alternatives, but sometimes we’re simply not aware they exist. Over here, the Universities & Colleges make a point of providing that chance to people on the spectrum to prove themselves & get ahead, if they can show they’re all about making an effort to succeed & complete the work involved. In some cases, they’ll allow you to complete basic Maths & English through them, while having already accepted you into the new courses you’ve chosen.

Sounds like you feel wrongly punished for something you may have done. You mentioned lack of intent. Sometimes, regardless of intent, we’re having to accept that life expects A,B & C of us & dealing with the consequences is par for the course. Hopefully, we become stronger from these things, no matter how right or how wrong they seem. Drawing a line under the past, having a plan for the future is what it’s all about. Is there a particular job you feel drawn to in life, a field that you think you’d be happy in?



CubsBullsBears
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12 Nov 2022, 1:22 am

Juliette wrote:
Sounds like you feel wrongly punished for something you may have done. You mentioned lack of intent. Sometimes, regardless of intent, we’re having to accept that life expects A,B & C of us & dealing with the consequences is par for the course. Hopefully, we become stronger from these things, no matter how right or how wrong they seem. Drawing a line under the past, having a plan for the future is what it’s all about. Is there a particular job you feel drawn to in life, a field that you think you’d be happy in?
I was actually speaking more about things that have nothing to do with me, which I've seen a lot of in life along with people not seeing how unjust something is. That said however, yes, there actually have been numerous times in my life where I got the short end of the stick and in some cases, got blamed for it as well, so I guess there's still truth to what you're saying.

Regarding the job thing: I have no fricken idea at the moment.


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kraftiekortie
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12 Nov 2022, 7:40 am

I’ve gotten the “short end of the stick” many times.

You shouldn’t let that perception interfere with you accomplishing things.



Juliette
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12 Nov 2022, 12:06 pm

CubsBullsBears wrote:
Juliette wrote:
Sounds like you feel wrongly punished for something you may have done. You mentioned lack of intent. Sometimes, regardless of intent, we’re having to accept that life expects A,B & C of us & dealing with the consequences is par for the course. Hopefully, we become stronger from these things, no matter how right or how wrong they seem. Drawing a line under the past, having a plan for the future is what it’s all about. Is there a particular job you feel drawn to in life, a field that you think you’d be happy in?
I was actually speaking more about things that have nothing to do with me, which I've seen a lot of in life along with people not seeing how unjust something is. That said however, yes, there actually have been numerous times in my life where I got the short end of the stick and in some cases, got blamed for it as well, so I guess there's still truth to what you're saying.

Regarding the job thing: I have no fricken idea at the moment.


I realised you might be talking about politics(Trump) only later. Is it possible you might be feeling as you do, due to the mood disorder you mention you might have. I’d be the last one to encourage medication, but if you’re experiencing prolonged periods of feeling down, or are up & down and all over the place, you might want to consider talking to someone. Evening out moods & stabilising emotions can alter so much for the better. Especially if it’s affecting your relationships or potential to have relationships/friendships with others & to be able to feel better about life.



CubsBullsBears
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13 Nov 2022, 4:28 am

Juliette wrote:
CubsBullsBears wrote:
Juliette wrote:
Sounds like you feel wrongly punished for something you may have done. You mentioned lack of intent. Sometimes, regardless of intent, we’re having to accept that life expects A,B & C of us & dealing with the consequences is par for the course. Hopefully, we become stronger from these things, no matter how right or how wrong they seem. Drawing a line under the past, having a plan for the future is what it’s all about. Is there a particular job you feel drawn to in life, a field that you think you’d be happy in?
I was actually speaking more about things that have nothing to do with me, which I've seen a lot of in life along with people not seeing how unjust something is. That said however, yes, there actually have been numerous times in my life where I got the short end of the stick and in some cases, got blamed for it as well, so I guess there's still truth to what you're saying.

Regarding the job thing: I have no fricken idea at the moment.


I realised you might be talking about politics(Trump) only later. Is it possible you might be feeling as you do, due to the mood disorder you mention you might have. I’d be the last one to encourage medication, but if you’re experiencing prolonged periods of feeling down, or are up & down and all over the place, you might want to consider talking to someone. Evening out moods & stabilising emotions can alter so much for the better. Especially if it’s affecting your relationships or potential to have relationships/friendships with others & to be able to feel better about life.
politics are a part of it. I won’t get into much detail bc this isn’t PPR, but I take serious issue to some of my family members views on certain things. Some of that is political and some is not.


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kraftiekortie
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13 Nov 2022, 6:17 am

I take issue with the political beliefs of some of my family, too.

Doesn’t mean I have to bemoan my existence because of that.

My mother didn’t want me around. I didn’t want to be around her. So I took steps not to be around her. Ironically, we mostly agree on politics.