Struggles putting baby to sleep

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aspiemike
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09 Jan 2023, 2:17 pm

I will keep this short and sweet. Got a 3 year old not happy with the lack of attention he is getting from me on his day home from daycare. He is crying in the next room. I took a few toys away from him today for throwing them and this is likely from lack of attention. The reason this is likely happening is because my 11 month old would not nap for me today. I tried him twice and both times, could not get him down. Mommy returned to work today after a year of parental leave. I switched to afrernoons at work. First day has been beyond frustrating.
I gave up after 1 hour of trying the first time. Brought baby back downstairs to play and 3 year old came down. Fed the baby after 1 hour. He then started to get tired around the same time 3 year old needed to poop. Brought the boys upstairs and baby to nap while 3 year old is playing in his room.

The problem is baby cries when I hold him to put him to sleep. Not right away, but when it looks like he is about to sleep. Put him in his crib and he gets way too playful. Something clearly isnt working here. After some back and forth, i just simply put him in his crib and left him while sitting a few feet away. I eventually had too leave the room to comfort the 3 year old. 3 year old is at daycare tomorrow. Based on what i have seen today, sleep may not go as planned later on for my wife.

Not sure what else i can do but try getting back at it tomorrow


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aspiemike
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13 Jan 2023, 2:35 pm

Follow up

Today was the other day 3 year old was at home. Got completely stressed as i woke up earlier than usual. Baby naptime suffered again. The three days 3 year old was at daycare this week, everything was manageable for me and some things got done. Not so on the other two days. Decided it was best to ask daycare provider if they can accomodate 5 days. Thankfully it wont be to drastic a difference with the childcare subsidy.

I do not have the skills to deal with both of them the whole day on limited sleep before my work starts.


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DW_a_mom
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23 Jan 2023, 4:46 pm

I'm a strong adherent of the "make life as easy as possible for yourself" camp, so if your 3 year old is happy in daycare and the day runs more smoothly for you, and you can solve your issue by sending him more days, I say go with it. Each battle you don't have to fight is a load of stress removed. A happier and less stressed parent is better able to be the parent both kids need.


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IsabellaLinton
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23 Jan 2023, 7:56 pm

I agree with DW. If your budget can manage it, and your older son seems content at daycare, then it's probably best for you all. It must be very hard working from home with young children. I would find it really difficult to compartmentalise or focus on my work because kids' needs are so varied and unpredictable.

I was a single parent working full-time when my kids were that age. I was up at 4 am to shuffle them to their nanny (she worked from her house not mine), drive an hour to work, work 8-9 hour days minimum, drive another hour home, and somehow manage to spend a bit of quality time in the evenings before collapsing in a coma until I got up to do it again. Working from home sounds idyllic but in many respects I think it would be even harder, so more power to you for finding a solution that works.

How are things now?


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