Dogs.

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Don't you just love those puppy eyes??? Makes your heart melt.

But let's get real.

Us, autistics, we often run on limited energy capacity. Getting together with a partner takes some. Then the two might decide to get a "pet" to expand the "family".

Dogs are man's best friend, right? They have got to be better. But. A dog demands a lot of daily attention, walking it, picking up crap after it. That takes some of that energy.

A couple with one or both autistic partners may agonize or procrastinate about having children, because raising a child takes a lot of energy. But they may get a dog, not giving it much thought, because you just gotta have those puppy eyes. But here's the thing, animals are like children, and there is a good reason why "owners" are often referred to as "parents" to a pet. If ultimately the family wants a child, it is obviously higher priority than a dog. And having both may almost certainly be stretching the limits of energy capacity of an autistic partner. So I must ask the question, why waste the energy on a dog (and pets in general), when instead it can be used to raise a child, the best you can, given that the child is ultimately wanted?


Getting a pet together is a stereotypical move for couples, but to me, dogs just seem like the wrong thing for autistic couples.

Last edited by r00tb33r on 16 Jan 2023, 8:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Being in a relationship doesn't take up energy for me.

I never shared a pet in a relationship.

I had them growing up, and then as a single mum for the kids.

They’ve always been my responsibility. Dogs in particular are a huge expense and a tremendous amount of work. I had them when dating (post-divorce) but I didn’t live with those people and the dogs were mine.

My beau and I each have a dog now but we don’t live together either.

I worry about couples who get pets and expect to share them. What happens when / if they split up? I’ve heard of custody fights over animals and that’s abusive to the pet. One of my exes killed my dog after leaving so I’m very protective of my pets now.

That person who killed your dog, at the very least, has a screw loose somewhere.

It’s shocking that this happened.

The act should at least be an indictable offence.

It was drunk driving.
He rolled the car on her in a ditch.

Of course, it’s still atrocious.

He had stolen her which was bad enough. Then he decided it would be smart to get drunk and drive a car while “walking” her beside the car, holding her lead through the open driver’s window, when it was raining, and staying at the side of the road by a ditch to avoid a drunk driving accident in traffic.

That was his version of multitasking so he himself wouldn’t get wet walking my dog.

RIP Bailey

I have to get out of all these bad memories lately.

It must be my meds making me so emotional.

It’s good to let out old memories.

I’m fortunate I’ve never run into these sorts of people.

Weren't most of your men homosexuals?

Per graduation requirements for my engineering degrees I had to complete credits in the social sciences category. I had a sociology course, because it was supposed to be easy with an easy professor. What I do remember is him drilling in the term "deviants" and how probability of deviations increases when other deviations occur. Clustering, essentially. It really sounds like your men were those scientifically defined deviants, with all those observations applied.