Page 1 of 4 [ 61 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4  Next

r00tb33r
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2016
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,778

17 Jan 2023, 7:17 pm

Does that kind of life work?


_________________
Enjoy the silence.


Recidivist
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2023
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,851
Location: He/him/his

17 Jan 2023, 7:19 pm

Works for me.


_________________
Another man's freedom fighter, one man's terrorist is - Yoda (probably)


Caz72
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Feb 2013
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,394
Location: England

17 Jan 2023, 7:22 pm

i dont have friends

i only have my boyfriend and my son

im happy that way


_________________
Have diagnosis of autism.
Have a neurotypical son.


IsabellaLinton
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 68,461
Location: Chez Quis

17 Jan 2023, 7:27 pm

I don't do living breathing friends.
I prefer vapours and imaginary goons online.


_________________
And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.


Highlander852456
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 1 Apr 2013
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 301
Location: Bratislava

18 Jan 2023, 2:10 am

Its good to have friends, because by definition you define people who are desirable in life as friends.
Its tautological word.

The problem is friends aren't always good or sometimes they are good, plus they can be pushy or bad company.

SO a good friend is always good. A true friend.

I think friendships should be symbiotic in sense both get something positive out of it.

I don't think its good friendship if only one person gets the good thing and the other nothing in return.

So yeah between bad friends and bad company and no friends, no friends win.

Good friends you can get along well is obviously good.



Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,461
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

18 Jan 2023, 2:15 am

Well I don't have any friends.

I got my boyfriend but that is not the same thing as having friends...uh these days idk even how to make a friend.

On that note me and my bf may try to get into some magic the gathering, we got decks...lol I am just hoping there are other 30+ people interested because idk nerd hobbies seems a way to meet people and idk being a bit nerdy myself I like nerds. But hopefully there are some in our age range and not just teens andd early 20's people. No problem with them just would be nice to meet people in my age group who are 30+ since I am 33 now.

But yeah we don't have friends currently.


_________________
We won't go back.


Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

18 Jan 2023, 5:39 am

Having friends is certainly desirable, if possible. There's no law that says you must have friends, but there are many advantages to having at least a few good friends.

Having good friends -- good enough to help each other in time of trouble -- is especially desirable for those of us who cannot rely on our families.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

18 Jan 2023, 5:58 am

It’s good to have friends. I don’t like the obligatory nature of many friendships.

I don’t find people to be “that bad” where I feel I don’t want the company of them.

But I don’t like social gatherings. I prefer to just hang with my tablet.

If you have the resources, it’s always good to travel the world.



Trueno
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2017
Age: 68
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,788
Location: UK

18 Jan 2023, 6:10 am

I have one very good friend. We sat next to each other at school and known each other for 55 years. We keep in contact via emails. I really don’t like social gatherings. Have a funeral coming up soon and there are about 5 people I’d like to meet again and a whole load I’d like to avoid.


_________________
Steve J

Unkind tongue, right ill hast thou me rendered
For such desert to do me wreak and shame


r00tb33r
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2016
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,778

19 Jan 2023, 7:22 am

I have no hatred toward people, in fact I'm often sympathetic. Still, I fail to connect, and fail to find motivation to continue communicating. Either a lack of common interests, or lack of interest in the person, or lack of enjoyment (not fun).


_________________
Enjoy the silence.


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

19 Jan 2023, 8:44 am

If you're interested in computers, you would have a ready audience here.

I know virtually nothing about computers---but have some knowledge of history.



AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,518

19 Jan 2023, 9:13 am

It is okay if you have less social needs/ don't need much social interaction.

For me, i would like to have more friends but i have trouble with maintaining them and came to accept the fact that i might not have any lasting friendships anymore.

Most importantly: you are not a bad or worthless person if you dont have friends. There can be lots of reasons why someone has no friends, and it is not simple.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

19 Jan 2023, 9:16 am

I have very few friends.

I feel worthless because I suck at fixing stuff around the house----not because I have very few friends.



r00tb33r
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2016
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,778

19 Jan 2023, 5:35 pm

^ I take too long fixing things because I always try to make it perfect.


_________________
Enjoy the silence.


Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

19 Jan 2023, 11:27 pm

r00tb33r wrote:
I have no hatred toward people, in fact I'm often sympathetic. Still, I fail to connect, and fail to find motivation to continue communicating. Either a lack of common interests, or lack of interest in the person

Have you made a point of seeking out people who share your interests, e.g. by seeking out relevant groups on Meetup.com?

Of course, not everyone who shares your interests is a potential friend, but shared interests are a good start. At least they give you something to talk about.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)


Silence23
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 10 Dec 2022
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 255
Location: Germany

20 Jan 2023, 8:34 am

Yes, it can work for more than a decade to not have offline friends. But it's probably better to avoid it.

Not sure about having no friends at all. Maybe having online friends could be psychologically beneficial. People you can trust and open up to, who you share common interests with. Trying to figure it out right now by finding people who are similar to me to have private conversations with (this is not a request, pls don't write me messages). May take a year until I reached my conclusion I guess.


_________________
Asperger syndrome (diagnosed), schizoid personality disorder (self-diagnosed), dysthymia (diagnosed)