How To Get A Girlfriend If You're An Autistic Man

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Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 1:56 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Furthermore, it occurs to me - are we not, those of us here in this thread, this forum, socializing? Holding conversations, expressing ideas, etc. Not only that, but there's a group of us. That means we're engaging in group socialization. We're each talking to multiple people. We're talking among our selves. Holding different conversations with different people simultaneously, as well as addressing the room. We're shifting and changing who we're talking to, on a moment-to-moment basis.

Doing this in a text-based online forum is very different from doing this in-person, in real time.

Many (though not all) autistic people are better able to handle online text-based interaction than in-person interaction.

Anyhow, I think many of us do need to be selective about which kinds of "social skills" we try to acquire. Trying to make ourselves appear NT-like in every way is known to be bad for autistic people's mental health. See, for example:

- Autism Masking: To Blend or Not to Blend by Rebecca Joy Stanborough, MFA, healthline, updated on Nov 19, 2021
- Autism Masking: How Hiding Your Neurodiversity Can Affect Your Mental Health by Hilya Delband Tehrani, PsyD, GoodRxHealth, August 29, 2022



Agreed. Finally a common sense post here stating the reality.



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02 Feb 2023, 2:01 am

uncommondenominator wrote:

Nades wrote:
Even I've rejected her because holding hands with her in the street would be bad enough, yet alone having to look after her.


Such a charmer! I bet you say that to all the girls...! :heart: *swoon!* :heart:

How svelt must the lady be to be worthy of the gentleman's time and attention? Are you yourself currently correspondingly muscular and fit? Or are you still "working on that"? You may want it, but are you there yet? Can you deliver? Or is that cheque still "in the mail".

If you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person, or so I've heard. If you feel that your social skills are sufficiently sub-par that YOU need to turn YOUR attention elsewhere, that's fine. You do you. But don't go around telling other people that their limits are lower just to absolve yourself of the expectation of improvement on your part.

You say autistics can't. I say the art music and writing section here demonstrates otherwise.

BTW, I met my wife when I was overweight and unemployed, with only a fraction of the skills I have now.

And I never said anyone in here was a pig. I said that some men in here seem so focused on sex, they end up treating women like livestock, whether they realize it or not - weighing them and measuring them and stamping them with ratings and labels - It just sounds like "USDA Approved, Lean Female, Grade B, suitable for consumption, but not a prime cut"

Ask yourself this - would you date a girl if you knew it would never lead to sex? If the answer is "no", you don't want a relationship, you want sex.


Good god. You're so sexist with your comments. Switch the sexes in your reply and take another look at it. For someone who complains about others feeling "superior" you seem to have a superiority complex on this thread along with white knighting.

I have a decent body. It's modestly muscular for my size. I didn't realise men had to be rippling muscle just to date someone who doesn't treat their body like crap and weigh 350 pounds of pure fat. If I seek standards in a woman, then I've already met them myself. I'm no hypocrite when it comes to standards.

Secondly men can seek sexual relationships too. Why does intending to seek one out make men objectify women? You would never say this sexist crap to women of she was looking for a sexual relationship....only men and clearly autistic men.

You have disgusting views on autistic men.



Last edited by Nades on 02 Feb 2023, 3:30 am, edited 2 times in total.

Mona Pereth
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02 Feb 2023, 2:03 am

To uncommondenominator: See also my post here, on the previous page.

But I do agree with most of the following:

uncommondenominator wrote:
I still can't help but feel that some of our problems are less related to an "inability" to learn social skills, and more related to some of the maladaptive behaviors we've picked up for w/e reason - like talking about women in off-putting ways

Yes! And various counterproductive attitudes reflected in those off-putting ways of talking about women, such as seeing one's hypothetical future partner primarily as a status symbol, as someone to be seen with, rather than as someone to relate to.

uncommondenominator wrote:
To be clear, when I say "social skills", I mean stuff like "managing emotions", and "dealing with conflict" and, oh, I dunno, "maintaining a relationship". Cos there's nothing a girl likes more than a big strong guy that can't handle being told "no" :roll:

I agree that the ability to "deal with conflict" in constructive ways is essential. I would also say that it should be prioritized over certain other kinds of "social skills." See, on my website, Autistic-friendly social skills vs. blending in with NT's and the accompanying lists of online tutorials on topics such as assertiveness, active listening, and conflict resolution.

Just one caveat: for some people, "managing emotions" may require the help of psychiatric drugs. Anti-depressants can make a huge difference for some people, though certainly not for everyone.

For other people, "managing emotions" may require avoiding sensory overload.

Exactly which set of "social skills" an autistic person can acquire will vary a lot from one autistic person to another.

uncommondenominator wrote:
I can cook all kinds of tasty food, from scratch. I can sew by hand and repair clothing. I can fix things around a house, including basic plumbing, electrical, carpentry, drywall, and painting. I can fix most things on a car, from changing oil to rebuilding an engine (formally trained mechanic). I'm building two racecars. I also work on boats. I can drive, pilot a boat, and ride a motorcycle. I can hitch a trailer and back it up around a corner. I can launch and trailer a boat. I've studied (formally) several different martial arts, including Kenpo Karate, Boxing, Tae Kwon Do, Brazilian Jiujutsu, Pekiti Tirsia Kali, and Pencak silat. I'm pretty handy with a knife or machete. I can throw a punch, and I can take a punch. I can build a PC from a pile of parts I picked myself, and diagnose and repair it if it breaks. I have been know to fix the occasional broken game console. I know how to weld.

I have a three octave vocal range when I'm warmed up, and I sing pretty well. I also play, write, and compose music, and have been known to dance from time to time. I know how to paint nails and apply acrylics. I can use a hair curler or a flat-iron without burning hair off. I can braid hair. I can dye hair. Sometimes I draw or paint. I like to write for fun. I prefer to practice the acquisition and application of alliteration and other neat mnemonic nuances normally known to be plentiful or prolific in prose and poetry, and practice tongue twisters to test my talents, and elevate my enunciation, should I happen to spur my soul to say something sweet to the smiling siren who sells sea shells by the seashore.

All of these are excellent skills to acquire, if one can. Even acquiring just half of these skills would be a great improvement for some of us here. And attending classes to learn some of these skills (such as sewing) might be a great way for some of the men here to meet women.

uncommondenominator wrote:
Being realistic about one's limitations isn't just about acknowledging what you can't do, but also being honest about what you can do, and working on those things to the best of your ability.

With this I agree. This is much more reasonable than the all-or-nothing attitude toward "social skills" that you've displayed elsewhere in this thread.

uncommondenominator wrote:
Nades wrote:
Even I've rejected her because holding hands with her in the street would be bad enough,

An example of what I mean by seeing prospective partners primarily as status symbols.

(Nades, correct me if I'm wrong, but your remark here seems to be all about wanting to be seen with a pretty woman and not an ugly one.)

uncommondenominator wrote:
BTW, I met my wife when I was overweight and unemployed, with only a fraction of the skills I have now.

And I never said anyone in here was a pig. I said that some men in here seem so focused on sex, they end up treating women like livestock, whether they realize it or not - weighing them and measuring them and stamping them with ratings and labels - It just sounds like "USDA Approved, Lean Female, Grade B, suitable for consumption, but not a prime cut"

Yep, that's a problem. And indeed it may tend to be a worse problem among autistic men than among NT men.

I think part of the problem is that, because autistic people tend to be socially underdeveloped, many of us have no idea what even a friendship is, much less what a romantic relationship is, before we reach adolescence and the hormones start kicking in.


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Last edited by Mona Pereth on 02 Feb 2023, 2:18 am, edited 4 times in total.

The_Face_of_Boo
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02 Feb 2023, 2:04 am

Nades wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Furthermore, it occurs to me - are we not, those of us here in this thread, this forum, socializing? Holding conversations, expressing ideas, etc. Not only that, but there's a group of us. That means we're engaging in group socialization. We're each talking to multiple people. We're talking among our selves. Holding different conversations with different people simultaneously, as well as addressing the room. We're shifting and changing who we're talking to, on a moment-to-moment basis.

Doing this in a text-based online forum is very different from doing this in-person, in real time.

Many (though not all) autistic people are better able to handle online text-based interaction than in-person interaction.

Anyhow, I think many of us do need to be selective about which kinds of "social skills" we try to acquire. Trying to make ourselves appear NT-like in every way is known to be bad for autistic people's mental health. See, for example:

- Autism Masking: To Blend or Not to Blend by Rebecca Joy Stanborough, MFA, healthline, updated on Nov 19, 2021
- Autism Masking: How Hiding Your Neurodiversity Can Affect Your Mental Health by Hilya Delband Tehrani, PsyD, GoodRxHealth, August 29, 2022



Agreed. Finally a common sense post here stating the reality.


Mona was always one of the logical ones.



Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 2:19 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
To uncommondenominator: See also my post here, on the previous page.

But I do agree with most of the following:

uncommondenominator wrote:
I still can't help but feel that some of our problems are less related to an "inability" to learn social skills, and more related to some of the maladaptive behaviors we've picked up for w/e reason - like talking about women in off-putting ways

Yes! And various counterproductive attitudes reflected in those off-putting ways of talking about women, such as seeing one's hypothetical future partner primarily as a status symbol, as someone to be seen with, rather than as someone to relate to.

uncommondenominator wrote:
To be clear, when I say "social skills", I mean stuff like "managing emotions", and "dealing with conflict" and, oh, I dunno, "maintaining a relationship". Cos there's nothing a girl likes more than a big strong guy that can't handle being told "no" :roll:

I agree that the ability to "deal with conflict" in constructive ways is essential. I would also say that it should be prioritized over certain other kinds of "social skills." See, on my website, Autistic-friendly social skills vs. blending in with NT's and the accompanying lists of online tutorials on topics such as assertiveness, active listening, and conflict resolution.

Just one caveat: for some people, "managing emotions" may require the help of psychiatric drugs. Anti-depressants can make a huge difference for some people, though certainly not for everyone.

Exactly which set of "social skills" an autistic person can acquire will vary a lot from one autistic person to another.

uncommondenominator wrote:
I can cook all kinds of tasty food, from scratch. I can sew by hand and repair clothing. I can fix things around a house, including basic plumbing, electrical, carpentry, drywall, and painting. I can fix most things on a car, from changing oil to rebuilding an engine (formally trained mechanic). I'm building two racecars. I also work on boats. I can drive, pilot a boat, and ride a motorcycle. I can hitch a trailer and back it up around a corner. I can launch and trailer a boat. I've studied (formally) several different martial arts, including Kenpo Karate, Boxing, Tae Kwon Do, Brazilian Jiujutsu, Pekiti Tirsia Kali, and Pencak silat. I'm pretty handy with a knife or machete. I can throw a punch, and I can take a punch. I can build a PC from a pile of parts I picked myself, and diagnose and repair it if it breaks. I have been know to fix the occasional broken game console. I know how to weld.

I have a three octave vocal range when I'm warmed up, and I sing pretty well. I also play, write, and compose music, and have been known to dance from time to time. I know how to paint nails and apply acrylics. I can use a hair curler or a flat-iron without burning hair off. I can braid hair. I can dye hair. Sometimes I draw or paint. I like to write for fun. I prefer to practice the acquisition and application of alliteration and other neat mnemonic nuances normally known to be plentiful or prolific in prose and poetry, and practice tongue twisters to test my talents, and elevate my enunciation, should I happen to spur my soul to say something sweet to the smiling siren who sells sea shells by the seashore.

All of these are excellent skills to acquire, if one can. Even acquiring just half of these skills would be a great improvement for some of us here. And attending classes to learn some of these skills (such as sewing) might be a great way for some of the men here to meet women.

uncommondenominator wrote:
Being realistic about one's limitations isn't just about acknowledging what you can't do, but also being honest about what you can do, and working on those things to the best of your ability.

With this I agree. This is much more reasonable than the all-or-nothing attitude toward "social skills" that you've displayed elsewhere in this thread.

uncommondenominator wrote:
Nades wrote:
Even I've rejected her because holding hands with her in the street would be bad enough,

An example of what I mean by seeing prospective partners primarily as status symbols.

(Nades, correct me if I'm wrong, but your remark here seems to be all about wanting to be seen with a pretty woman and not an ugly one.)

uncommondenominator wrote:
BTW, I met my wife when I was overweight and unemployed, with only a fraction of the skills I have now.

And I never said anyone in here was a pig. I said that some men in here seem so focused on sex, they end up treating women like livestock, whether they realize it or not - weighing them and measuring them and stamping them with ratings and labels - It just sounds like "USDA Approved, Lean Female, Grade B, suitable for consumption, but not a prime cut"

Yep, that's a problem. And indeed it may tend to be a worse problem among autistic men than among NT men.

I think part of the problem is that, because autistic people tend to be socially underdeveloped, many of us have no idea what even a friendship is, much less what a romantic relationship is, before we reach adolescence and the hormones start kicking in.


Nope I actually haven't said that at all. Uncommondenominator just puts so many words into the mouths of men here it's hard to tell what I originally said.

I don't want to date people who are clearly not looking after their health and that's pretty much it. Whether they're attractive or not is separate.



Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 2:29 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
That means you can't try? You won't know how far you can improve unless you do it. But why go to all that work when you can just make another excuse.

Besides, I'm not sure that's as true as you'd like it to be, as a defense. But again, it makes a handy excuse.

I think it's good to determine, as exactly as possible, what one's actual neurological limiting factors are regarding the development of social skills.

For example, many of us have attention issues of a kind that that makes us worse at multi-tasking than most people are. This intrinsically limits the kinds of group social activities we can participate in well.

On the other hand, most of us can improve at one-on-one conversation, even if we will never be able to handle group chitchat very well. Also, as for group activity, many of us can become much better at structured group activity, e.g. games, than random group chitchat.


I was going to point out, that all someone has to do to thwart your suggestion, is to say "no they can't!" - but I see someone else has already demonstrated this for me.

The only difference I see between your suggestion and the implication that autistics "can't!" learn social skills, is by the degree. Instead of ALL social skills being thrown off the table as options, only HALF of social skills have been discarded entirely, with the remaining options presented like a new previously unforeseen opportunity, as though it wasn't an option the whole time.

Furthermore, it occurs to me - are we not, those of us here in this thread, this forum, socializing? Holding conversations, expressing ideas, etc. Not only that, but there's a group of us. That means we're engaging in group socialization. We're each talking to multiple people. We're talking among our selves. Holding different conversations with different people simultaneously, as well as addressing the room. We're shifting and changing who we're talking to, on a moment-to-moment basis. OMG! It's almost as if we actually have social skills!

I still can't help but feel that some of our problems are less related to an "inability" to learn social skills, and more related to some of the maladaptive behaviors we've picked up for w/e reason - like talking about women in off-putting ways, or putting "NT"s on a pedestal far beyond the reach of the supposed limitations of the abilities of us autistics.

As for "hittin' the gym"...

If you want to work out to be healthy, good on you - but do it for yourself.

If you want to work out to be "pretty", good for you - it's vanity, but good for you for doing something about it - but do it for yourself.

If you want to work out to be "pretty" cos you think it will win over "the ladies", (But also totally health! Yup, definitely health, and not vanity at all!), you're not doing it for yourself. You're doing it to get attention. And you're expecting it to carry the weight of a lot of other things.

Furthermore, it's the whole package, not just the "working out". It's not only rubber stamping "social skills" as "INCONCEIVABLE!" ("you keep using that word...") but also focusing exclusively on Muscles!, as though they can compensate for anything, with the occasional afterthought of something obvious like "being able to drive" or "being a semi-functional adult".

"Muscles! can make you interesting! Muscles! give you something to talk about! Muscles! can give you personality! Muscles! can make you charming!"

Which by the way, if Muscles! can make you charming and add to personality, then why such a fuss about being expected to have personality? Aren't you going to have Muscles!? Isn't that going to add to your personality?

Which, you are SLIIIIIIIGHTLY correct, that having hobbies does add to personality - but ideally, it should be more than "one single 'hobby', and literally nothing else".

To be clear, when I say "social skills", I mean stuff like "managing emotions", and "dealing with conflict" and, oh, I dunno, "maintaining a relationship". Cos there's nothing a girl likes more than a big strong guy that can't handle being told "no" :roll:

I don't normally talk about what I personally can do, or have done, cos it's not fair to assume that just cos I can, that anyone else can. At the same time, I don't think I'm anything special, and don't see why others couldn't do at least some of the stuff that I have, to some degree, especially having seen so many others on this site that can do some pretty cool things, that I can't, or haven't.

However, just to provide a benchmark, here are some of my skills which are in no way "social" or socially related:

I can cook all kinds of tasty food, from scratch. I can sew by hand and repair clothing. I can fix things around a house, including basic plumbing, electrical, carpentry, drywall, and painting. I can fix most things on a car, from changing oil to rebuilding an engine (formally trained mechanic). I'm building two racecars. I also work on boats. I can drive, pilot a boat, and ride a motorcycle. I can hitch a trailer and back it up around a corner. I can launch and trailer a boat. I've studied (formally) several different martial arts, including Kenpo Karate, Boxing, Tae Kwon Do, Brazilian Jiujutsu, Pekiti Tirsia Kali, and Pencak silat. I'm pretty handy with a knife or machete. I can throw a punch, and I can take a punch. I can build a PC from a pile of parts I picked myself, and diagnose and repair it if it breaks. I have been know to fix the occasional broken game console. I know how to weld.

I have a three octave vocal range when I'm warmed up, and I sing pretty well. I also play, write, and compose music, and have been known to dance from time to time. I know how to paint nails and apply acrylics. I can use a hair curler or a flat-iron without burning hair off. I can braid hair. I can dye hair. Sometimes I draw or paint. I like to write for fun. I prefer to practice the acquisition and application of alliteration and other neat mnemonic nuances normally known to be plentiful or prolific in prose and poetry, and practice tongue twisters to test my talents, and elevate my enunciation, should I happen to spur my soul to say something sweet to the smiling siren who sells sea shells by the seashore.

I am an Associate of Arts, having studied math, chemistry, history, art, communications, and psychology. I'm a Bachelor of Applied Sciences in the field of Organizational Behavior Management, with a background in behavior. I'm a Master of Business Administration, and all that that entails. And while the following are "social skills", I am a skilled writer, and have no problems presenting in front of groups - I'm good at it and enjoy it. I can speak extemporaneously with very little preparation. I've tutored my peers and helped them improve their writing skills. Just to name some of my skills and abilities.

I am autistic. Every skill I have, every last one, I had to WORK at, to get to where it is now. All of them. Not for a few weeks, or even a few months. Years, of actual hard work, effort, discomfort, overcoming my issues one by one, and finding a way. Of failing over and over so I at least got practice, at least I tried. I broke cars. I ruined computers. I knocked myself stupid with sticks and cut myself on occasions when learning Kali. I got hit in the face when I was learning boxing. I failed the occasional class. I delivered some horrible speeches. I'm still not who or where I want to be, but at least I'm doing something about it, and have something to show for it. And despite that, now I can do all that stuff I couldn't do before. But I wouldn't have, if I'd given up or just made excuses for what I "can't" do.

I don't expect to be applauded for it, but I also don't particularly care to hear people whine about the "impossible", while other people have done, and are doing it. Not just me, but all the other people on here who are making progress and doing better in their lives.

Dismissing all that as "luck" undercuts all the work and effort that went into it making it happen. And claiming that autistics "can't" do it, invalidates the possibility that it could have even been accomplished to begin with - as I said, a slap in the face to all the autistic people on here that DO have social skills, and personalities, and probably also worked hard to develop them. The poets, the artists, the writers, the musicians, the adventurers, The MARRIED.

Being realistic about one's limitations isn't just about acknowledging what you can't do, but also being honest about what you can do, and working on those things to the best of your ability.

Nades wrote:
Even I've rejected her because holding hands with her in the street would be bad enough, yet alone having to look after her.


Such a charmer! I bet you say that to all the girls...! :heart: *swoon!* :heart:

How svelt must the lady be to be worthy of the gentleman's time and attention? Are you yourself currently correspondingly muscular and fit? Or are you still "working on that"? You may want it, but are you there yet? Can you deliver? Or is that cheque still "in the mail".

If you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person, or so I've heard. If you feel that your social skills are sufficiently sub-par that YOU need to turn YOUR attention elsewhere, that's fine. You do you. But don't go around telling other people that their limits are lower just to absolve yourself of the expectation of improvement on your part.

You say autistics can't. I say the art music and writing section here demonstrates otherwise.

BTW, I met my wife when I was overweight and unemployed, with only a fraction of the skills I have now.

And I never said anyone in here was a pig. I said that some men in here seem so focused on sex, they end up treating women like livestock, whether they realize it or not - weighing them and measuring them and stamping them with ratings and labels - It just sounds like "USDA Approved, Lean Female, Grade B, suitable for consumption, but not a prime cut"

Ask yourself this - would you date a girl if you knew it would never lead to sex? If the answer is "no", you don't want a relationship, you want sex.



Jesus Christ, and yet I am atheist, but…. Jesus Christ!

Are you done with mansplaining everyone?

If autistics can really improve themselves in « unlimited way » then let’s burn the whole DSM while we are at it. According to you, mental conditions are just bunch of excuses in order not to improve ourselves.



Yeah, he's been saying this entire time that autisitcs can socialise their way out of autism and only then are they worthy of dating.

Not only that but social skills are apparently all that matter too. Nothing else.

I guess I can become a crack addict or something then. Unemployed? A drunkard, a star on my 600ibs life? Apparently none of that matters.

He could have had a constructive point to make but he started being obnoxious towards the men immediately in doing so and still is.

His list of skills too lol. How ironic considering he was accusing me of superiority. Its a multi paragraph wall of flex for the ladies of WP to see here.

I haven't mentioned my list of skills and achievements here, have you?



uncommondenominator
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02 Feb 2023, 3:53 am

Argue, excuse, deflect, project. Got it.

I'm trying to flex for the ladies, says MR MUSCLES! "Oh yes mona, you always were my FAVORITE!" says the guy claiming I'm trying to win people over. Could you be any more obvious.

Dramatically scoffing in hyperbole may make you feel cool, but nobody suggested that you had to date a 600 lb crackhead, or that all autistics can just wish anything away - but if you didn't exaggerate what I said, it might sound reasonable.

No, you haven't made a list of skills. Do you even have any? You can make out like I was just trying to brag, but what do you bring to the table? It's a fair question. If you want a girlfriend, what makes you such a great boyfriend?

"Wow, look at him brag!" Would you rather I expect something from others, that I can't do my self? Should I make demands for things I can't even do? Should I have said "improve!" even though I haven't improved? Yes, I'm proud of what I did. Wouldn't you be?

Besides, isn't this thread called "how to get a girlfriend"? Those abilities help me get girlfriends. If I say people should do them, "thats impossible!" If I say I have them, "wow, what a braggart!" - it's chuckle-f*ckery, dancing around to avoid the point with strawmen.

Seriously, what do you offer, besides muscles and excuses?



Last edited by uncommondenominator on 02 Feb 2023, 4:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 4:19 am

uncommondenominator wrote:
Argue, excuse, deflect, project. Got it.


Wow, you're being so obnoxious. You're insulting every single guy on this thread.

I've never seen such a large ego stroking post on WP before too. Your lack of self awareness is dreadful considering everything else you've said here and how critical you are of autistic men (other than yourself that is). It's just endless mansplaining, dick swinging, white knighting and personal attacks from you.



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02 Feb 2023, 4:26 am

Nades wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
.



Yeah, he's been saying this entire time that autisitcs can socialise their way out of autism and only then are they worthy of dating.

Not only that but social skills are apparently all that matter too. Nothing else.

I guess I can become a crack addict or something then. Unemployed? A drunkard, a star on my 600ibs life? Apparently none of that matters.

He could have had a constructive point to make but he started being obnoxious towards the men immediately in doing so and still is.

His list of skills too lol. How ironic considering he was accusing me of superiority. Its a multi paragraph wall of flex for the ladies of WP to see here.

I haven't mentioned my list of skills and achievements here, have you?



We have finally found someone who can beat Chuck Norris.



uncommondenominator
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02 Feb 2023, 4:31 am

Nades wrote:
Your lack of self awareness is dreadful


Just blame it on my autism. It's a social disability. That's a FACT. Right?

Dance around, avoid avoid, excuse excuse, exaggerate, whine...

Mansplaining? Lol c'mon now... :jester:



Last edited by uncommondenominator on 02 Feb 2023, 4:51 am, edited 1 time in total.

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02 Feb 2023, 4:41 am

uncommondenominator wrote:
Nades wrote:
Your lack of self awareness is dreadful


Just blame it on my autism. It's a social disability. That's a FACT. Right?.


Ummmm. Yes it is.



Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 4:42 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Nades wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
.



Yeah, he's been saying this entire time that autisitcs can socialise their way out of autism and only then are they worthy of dating.

Not only that but social skills are apparently all that matter too. Nothing else.

I guess I can become a crack addict or something then. Unemployed? A drunkard, a star on my 600ibs life? Apparently none of that matters.

He could have had a constructive point to make but he started being obnoxious towards the men immediately in doing so and still is.

His list of skills too lol. How ironic considering he was accusing me of superiority. Its a multi paragraph wall of flex for the ladies of WP to see here.

I haven't mentioned my list of skills and achievements here, have you?



We have finally found someone who can beat Chuck Norris.


Assuming he's from the US, he's probably swimming across the Atlantic to deal with us as we speak.



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02 Feb 2023, 4:46 am

Nades wrote:

Assuming he's from the US, he's probably swimming across the Atlantic to deal with us as we speak.


Like....Beowulf!



uncommondenominator
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02 Feb 2023, 5:02 am

Nades wrote:
uncommondenominator wrote:
Nades wrote:
Your lack of self awareness is dreadful


Just blame it on my autism. It's a social disability. That's a FACT. Right?.


Ummmm. Yes it is.


Then why are you ever so surprised at my behavior? I'm autistic! I can't have social skills! Remember?

But thank you for insulting me for having the audacity of being autistic.

Even if you try to spin this and point out that I say they can learn skills, you say they can't, therefore if you're right, and I'm wrong, you shouldn't expect them of me, even if I do of you. That would be hypocritical of you, even if it is of me. And yet, if you know so well, that autism is a social disability, regardless of what I claim, if you truly believe that autistics cant have social skills, you should expect me to not have them, nor be surprised when I infodump about my special interests or talk excessively about myself, regardless of my reasons, whether bragging or making a point.

After all, I'm autistic! I can't have social skills! But you'll expect them of me, AND mock me for not having them? Even though you insist we CAN'T have them?

Cut the crap already.

"How Do I Get Girlfriend?"

Here's an autistically thorough list of things that help me get girlfriends

"WOW WHAT A BRAGGART!

Well f*uckin SCUSE ME for having talent...

"You're just trying to look good for the ladies!"

Is that not what the thread is about?

"SEXIST WHITE KNIGHT BRAGGART MANSPLAINER SASSAFRAS CARBUNKLE BANANA CREAM PIE!! !"

Fascinating.



Last edited by uncommondenominator on 02 Feb 2023, 5:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

Nades
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02 Feb 2023, 5:02 am

You ask several questions about what I look like in a single paragraph and then get offended when I say what I look like :?

Hmmm OK, weird logic.



uncommondenominator
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02 Feb 2023, 5:22 am

Nades wrote:
and then get offended when I say what I look like :?



Where exactly did I do this? I don't have social skills, and I'm not very self-aware, so I don't know. Please help me understand.

Also,

Nades wrote:
If I seek standards in a woman, then I've already met them myself. I'm no hypocrite when it comes to standards.


just like you say you wouldn't expect something that you couldn't deliver on, cos you're not a hypocrite - that's why I listed what I'm capable of, so I wouldn't be setting a standard that I couldn't also meet.

I know how this game works. If I say nothing, I'm a talker with no proof. If I list a buncha stuff, I'm bragging. Any number of things listed in between is either not enough, or too much, too hot, too cold, too medium... whatever you can say to dismiss things.



Last edited by uncommondenominator on 02 Feb 2023, 5:45 am, edited 2 times in total.