Page 1 of 1 [ 16 posts ] 

cool09
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 17 Mar 2023
Age: 60
Gender: Male
Posts: 26
Location: Chesapeake City MD

19 Mar 2023, 7:59 pm

I don't consider myself emotionally stable. Like rejection and criticism sends me spiraling out of control and my self-esteem crashes. If someone looks at me the wrong way I feel very slighted. Is all of this normal? Or is it some kind of disorder? I don't know how normal people work 8 hrs a day and nothing seems to bother them or interfere with their work. It's been 20 yrs since I've worked and work was horrible. I worked for USAF and everyone criticized me because I wasn't "social" and everyone were a-holes.



funeralxempire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 39
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 25,188
Location: Right over your left shoulder

19 Mar 2023, 8:04 pm

Rejection sensitive dysphoria is a pretty typical symptom of ADHD.

https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/rejectio ... -dysphoria


_________________
"If you stick a knife in my back 9 inches and pull it out 6 inches, there's no progress. If you pull it all the way out, that's not progress. The progress is healing the wound that the blow made... and they won't even admit the knife is there." Malcolm X
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


timf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Oct 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,040

20 Mar 2023, 6:50 am

Being hypersensitive is not uncommon in Aspergers, both to sensation and social interaction. We can misread the words of others and react with anger or hurt.

When I entered the workforce (in the 1960s) most of the workers were of the WWII generation. They tended to a jocularity that included insulting each other. When I was asked why I objected (such as being asked, "What is the matter, can't you take it"), I responded that I questioned the assumption that people should be required to "take it".

In the last 60 years social homogenization has increased to such an extent that it seems in work environments failure to blend in is regarded as worse than failure to do the job. I found a little more "social elbow room" working third shift.



rse92
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 14 Oct 2021
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,076
Location: Buffalo, NY

20 Mar 2023, 9:11 am

cool09 wrote:
I don't consider myself emotionally stable. Like rejection and criticism sends me spiraling out of control and my self-esteem crashes. If someone looks at me the wrong way I feel very slighted. Is all of this normal? Or is it some kind of disorder? I don't know how normal people work 8 hrs a day and nothing seems to bother them or interfere with their work. It's been 20 yrs since I've worked and work was horrible. I worked for USAF and everyone criticized me because I wasn't "social" and everyone were a-holes.


You literally have not had a job for twenty years?

What do you do?



cool09
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 17 Mar 2023
Age: 60
Gender: Male
Posts: 26
Location: Chesapeake City MD

20 Mar 2023, 11:58 am

I don't do much. I have anhedonia really bad and don't enjoy anything (like taking walks, etc.). I'm a mess. I have trouble talking and feel disconnected to my speech which causes lots of anxiety. Don't know where to turn anymore, I've seen so many drs and therapists (including 6 inpatient stays at Johns Hopkins). I asked a Dr there what she knew about mood disorders and she said, "Not much. Maybe in 10 yrs we'll know more". There you have it...



skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,295
Location: my own little world

20 Mar 2023, 3:10 pm

cool09 wrote:
I don't consider myself emotionally stable. Like rejection and criticism sends me spiraling out of control and my self-esteem crashes. If someone looks at me the wrong way I feel very slighted. Is all of this normal? Or is it some kind of disorder? I don't know how normal people work 8 hrs a day and nothing seems to bother them or interfere with their work. It's been 20 yrs since I've worked and work was horrible. I worked for USAF and everyone criticized me because I wasn't "social" and everyone were a-holes.
What specifically happens to you when you feel slighted and spiral out of control?


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


cool09
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 17 Mar 2023
Age: 60
Gender: Male
Posts: 26
Location: Chesapeake City MD

20 Mar 2023, 5:47 pm

Quote:
What specifically happens to you when you feel slighted and spiral out of control?

My confidence gets shattered and I get depressed.



skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,295
Location: my own little world

20 Mar 2023, 6:27 pm

cool09 wrote:
Quote:
What specifically happens to you when you feel slighted and spiral out of control?

My confidence gets shattered and I get depressed.
Does it make you suicidal?


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


xxSkull_Princessxx
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 26 Mar 2023
Gender: Female
Posts: 99
Location: United States

20 May 2023, 1:08 pm

To me, this sounds like atypical depression.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atypical_depression


_________________
Diagnosed with autism as a toddler and diagnosed with general anxiety disorder at the age of 9.


Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

20 May 2023, 2:26 pm

cool09 wrote:
Quote:
What specifically happens to you when you feel slighted and spiral out of control?

My confidence gets shattered and I get depressed.


Me too. :cry:
I sometimes get suicidal thoughts but I've never acted on them. It's a good job I don't drink, otherwise I might have had more guts to do such a thing.

I'm also missing my mum really badly at the moment and I just feel emotionally vulnerable and tearful.


_________________
Female


SharonB
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jul 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,733

20 May 2023, 6:02 pm

I can be confident and with good emotional boundaries, but mostly I am as you described. I wish I spent more time in the confidence zone. Nature and nurture contrived against me to some degree. I like the idea that I will own my power some day, or at least more of it. Perhaps like most everything for me and ASD, it's how to modulate it. I'm either a timid mouse or a ferocious lion and timid seemed to "work" better. Something in the middle, or a touch towards lion would be nice.



colliegrace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Nov 2022
Age: 30
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 1,263
Location: USA

20 May 2023, 6:49 pm

Autism can come with emotional dysregulation, so I think autistic people can have RSD too. I think it's fairly common in neurodivergent people, and people with personality disorders as well. I'm AuDHD (autism + ADHD), most likely, and I have avoidant personality disorder.... so I get RSD a lot. Any sort of criticism, often even gentle criticism, is like a knife to the heart.


_________________
ASD, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well. Also dx'd ADHD-C, but don't think it's accurate.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


SharonB
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jul 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,733

21 May 2023, 9:10 am

I've just started seeing the AuDHD term. That's me too. Supposedly my daughter is ASD only and my son is ADHD only. Whatevs: all spectrum-y. My son expresses his big feelings and my daughter suppresses, similar to my dad who is perhaps ADHD only and my mom who is ASD only --- so it appears the two tendencies came together in me and then separated out again.



KitLily
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jan 2021
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,074
Location: England

21 May 2023, 9:20 am

I really don't know how humans remain unaffected by their emotions. I'm certainly not, I'm very emotional and up and down.

I don't know why it's so fashionable to be 'cool' and not show emotions. It seems if we show emotions, it's bad somehow.

We should all be educated about emotions and how to handle them. It's so important for people to know this.

Well that was a general observation, anyway. Not sure if it helps.


_________________
That alien woman. On Earth to observe and wonder about homo sapiens.


CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,304
Location: Stalag 13

21 May 2023, 10:07 pm

I'm also a highly sensitive person. especially when it has to do with emotions. It takes a lot for me to control my emotions.


_________________
Who wants to adopt a Sweet Pea?


AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,518

22 May 2023, 12:45 am

I agree that rsd might be the reason. I am also like that, i try to not take what people say and do personally but it is hard.

Especially when you already think you are not good enough